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I am in love with a younger guy

 
 
Ojav26
 
Reply Fri 18 Sep, 2015 09:57 pm
I work in a school and handle hostel duties since 4 months, there is one particular student that I have fallen for .he's an introvert and very shy yet somehow I manage to get him to speak to me, he's the captain of the volley ball team and is currently single.although he's dark skinned and has a lot of pimples yet that doesn't bother me. I have come to love him for his personality a through gentleman. He's straight and only 16 I am 33 and gay but leaning towards bi.

I will it see him after he graduates which is in about 6 months roughly and am already depressed. I sometimes feel it's better if I talk less to him but at the same time can't miss the chance of not talking to him. Each time I talk to him I feel happy yet there's sadness cos I know we can never be together. I love him too much and how I wish I could somehow get a hug from him that would be the best day if my life.

I am at a loss of words here what should I do or not do. Please advice.
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Sat 19 Sep, 2015 04:29 am
@Ojav26,
You're not in love. It's a crush.

I imagine your school has employment policies forbidding employees from dating students, particularly underage ones. You might want to revisit your employees' handbook if you're unsure.

Seriously. Don't get fired over this kid.

In the meantime, you're obsessed. You need to meet other people. Hell, it sounds like you don't even know if this kid is gay.
Ojav26
 
  1  
Reply Tue 22 Sep, 2015 09:40 pm
@jespah,
Tks for being so frank. But the thing is that I really love him, I wasn't talking to him for 2 days and I literally died I made peace and now we are talking again yet the conversation isn't fluid.

He's more to me than just sex and it hasn't crossed my mind that I want him in bed.i have had my share of random hookups and sometimes with the same guy more than twice. Yet I hadnt fell anything like this before.

I can wait till he's legal but I know he's straight yet I feel I can make him love me if we see each other for a long time. All I want is him in my life. I would do anything just to be with him and I am not that stupid to do "Anything " at my workplace and with a "Minor".

But I am truly lovelorn .he's cast a spell on me.
0 Replies
 
GayguyNZ
 
  2  
Reply Tue 5 Jan, 2016 08:05 pm
@Ojav26,
Hi

I really really have sympathy for your situation and I read the other reply that is here. It is very good advice. You are emotionally vulnerable at the moment and this young guy is at an age where he really likes you taking an interest in him.

You say that he is not gay. HE IS NOT GAY. He is attracted to you because you are kind and caring and he needs kindness and caring help.

You are in a position where there is a disparity of power and everyone will see that you should not go anywhere near doing anything or saying anything about how you feel. Believe me he will be shocked and embarrassed. He will not know how to cope and you will completely destroy your kind relationship with him.

It's fine to be nice to this boy but do not go further.

You NEED a relationship with someone closer to your age. At least someone who is in their twenties if you want a younger gay friend. Go out. Find a gay friend. Find someone you can share all that love and affection with - not a child. Yes I know you see him as a young man but everyone else sees him as a child.

Being attracted to someone inappropriately is not a crime. Doing something to someone who is young would be considered a crime and totally inappropriate so just do not go there.

All the best. You are a nice guy and you deserve a great relationship with another gay guy. The relationship you want is one that is a real connection. You can only get that with someone who has the ability to relate at the same level as you. This young man is NOT capable of being emotionally available like you want him to be. You need to find that with an adult away from your school Go out and find that.

Cheers

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