Good Morning A2K!

Thank you Jr. I appreciate you.

Timur's hatred of religious people (or even slightly religious people) is just like racism. Ironically, there have been religious individuals in my life whom I can't stand. I wouldn't be surprised if, in fact, over the decades I've been more hurt by religious individuals than Timur has.

I don't hate Timur. I don't even know him. I just don't like him dumping on apparently nice people he doesn't even know. It's like hating someone just because he's black or gay.

Sounds to me like Timur has some pain in his life. So do I. I hope someday he has peace of mind. I wish him well.

Enough of this. I've grown tired of online rage partly because I'm physically tired all the time. It's an exercise in futility. Besides, reality beckons. Best wishes to all, and to all a good . . .

There you are, spreading more ****. I said religion is a disease, it has nothing to do with love.

I seem to remember that you know very little about love.



A lot more **** here.

All what religious people have done to me is what you are doing right now:

Trying to shove religion down my throat and denying it.

You are even more wicked than most, with your pitiful innuendos.

Your religiosity is really a disease.

If you think that disliking people that force their religion on others, disliking rapers, disliking violence towards women is racism, then I'm racist.

Live with that.





See, you have been hurt more than I did, because I haven't been hurt at all.

I just dislike the unfairness, the injustice and the mental violence of all religions.

Gosh Jr. I am so sorry you have been hurt too! I swear man. It really does make me angry. And ya know, while I was actually still trying to "fit" in the church environment that is probably the worst rejection I have faced in my life. Nothing I could do was ever good enough or "right" in their eyes. They'd look me right in the eyes, tell me they "love me in the Lord" while pointing out, and focusing on my every imperfection.

If not TO me... To everyone else. And why? So they could "pray" for me becuase I am such a cigarette smoking heathen. Lol Obviously there were a few good people along the way too, and there still are. I've met them here actually. I can't say I have one real life friend who is a Christian and not religious at this point though. It is pretty disheartening to be honest. To still feel that hateful judgement from people who don't even really know me, yet claim to "love the Lord."

But it is what it is. Awful. Unjust. Unfair. People. Just hurting people. We all are, and I meant it when I said I would take the pain and carry it myself for Timur, you, and anyone if I could. But I can't. So I hope to at least be a beacon of hope that there is real love out there... That won't judge you. Won't criticize your every thought or move. Won't say I love you, without even understanding what it really IS to love someone. That won't make you feel small and unworthy. Undesirable, Unacceptable.

Everyone carries beauty inside if them. I honestly believe that with all my heart. It's just that sometimes life heaps so much junk on a person that beauty gets harder to see because it gets buried, lost, then forgotten.

I don't hate much, but if there is one thing I undeniably hate with a passion... It is religion... In ALL it's forms, because believe me... Religion is not confined to the church alone, and all who are religous carry and display all the same character traits.

Timur... Did you forget that YOU invited YOURSELF to this thread? Lol Wowsers.

Actually Jr... This was wrong:



I actually don't have one single real life friend right now. Christian or not. Over the years they all just got lost in time and space somehow. When we tried to reconnect, the connection was no longer available. I have a husband who I know loves me, but doesn't listen or appear to care about the same things I do most of the time. I assume that's a man thing? Not in a bad way... We're just of a different design.

I have a step son who is harboring extreme anger inside about his dead beat mom and guilt parenting dad and choses to lash out at me the majority of the time. Who lies to my face and will defend that lie to the death. He is mean to my dogs when he thinks I'm not looking and he's angry at me. But... We do have the occasional good interaction too... I like those the best... Lol

We are always together because I am home schooling him. I don't attend church. I don't have a car to go anywhere and do anything. We have very little food in our fridge because of how badly we have been screwed by some of the people in this little town I live in. Every month for the last year really it's been a struggle just to pay the bills let alone eat. So... I eat about five or six times a week. No biggy.

It's far more important my step son eat. He's got a lot of life ahead of him. I'd like him to survive to actually live it. We have had constant harassment for the last week from bill collectors for the ones we had to skip just to get a little food this last check.

People pounding on our door day or night. No joke. Apparently, this kind of behavior is accepted by the police in this town as the main person doing it sent his cop friend over to my house a month ago to talk to my husband about some stuff he was accused of stealing and didn't. I had run to the store and he came while I was gone.

While he was here he banged on the door several times then began trying to peek in the windows. Got in the car and circled the block a few times, then on his way out stopped by to talk to our landlord to ask some personal questions about us. The friend from way back that I stayed with for a while. Well, I do consider her a friend. But we never talk or hang out anymore. She is so lost in her own world of hurt right now and well... It happens.

I understand and I love her. When she's ready for a friend again I will still be here. Other that that... Well... That's it. Whatever social interactions I have are here or if I decide to walk the 10 mile round trip to the nearest store. Lol It all sounds really bad... But it's not. It is what it is... For right now. It is slowly changing though. Things are finally starting to get better and we are not giving up our fight to make them better for ourselves.

As for me, though life feels pretty lonely still on the home front sometimes. I would sure like to have some friends again some day. That should come a little easier when we have a car again... Lol Though I won't be looking for friends in church. This love that I have... It's really all I have left to offer anyone. It's all I really want to give anyway. It's hard to watch people you care about hurting. It really is.

Goodnight A2K ! Sweet dreams and peace to all.

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I hope if you have never been able to really hear what I am trying to say, and you decide to push that play button... Tonight will be the night you hear my heart loud and clear.

Good Afternoon A2K! I hope y'all have a great day!

Bwaaaaaahahaha! I love this song! Haven't seen the movie yet...

Good Morning A2K! I hope y'all are enjoying a nice, sunny spring day... Somewhere... Cause it is no longer here. As a matter a fact it is blizzarding outside right now. NO JOKE! Lol

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It's another one of those songs... Just so ya know!



Peace out!

Good Morning A2K! I hope y'all have a great Monday!

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Disclaimer: This one's a wee bit "christiany".... It is indeed.

Good morning all!



Bad Religion – “God’s Love”
(Tell me!) Tell me; where is the love?
In a careless creation
When there’s no “above”
There’s no justice
Just a cause and a cure
And a bounty of suffering
It seems we all endure
And what I’m frightened of
Is that they call it “God’s love”

Timur, bad religion is what hurts people, and not just the "churchy" kind either. Bad religion comes from mankind and is based on his limited understanding of spiritual principle's. The love is there. It always has been. It's just a matter of being willing to see it and embrace it. Though I understand that is hard to do when one is wound as tightly as you. Have a great day Timur. It is always nice to see you.

Your comment is beside the point.

"Bad religion" is the name of the band.

Love is beyond any religion, good or bad (if there is such thing).

B. A. D.

Good Morning A2K! It is a gloriously sunny day out today! I hope y'all get a chance to enjoy it!

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Disclaimer: This one is perhaps a little more than a wee bit "christiany". Lol



This song has a little bit of a story behind it. Two years ago when we were first trying to start up the rescue ranch I was quite excited, as I thought this dream I had been dreaming for over ten years was finally coming true. I was making an honest effort to try to get a feeling of some sort of "sense" and purpose back in my life.

Through out my years, for some reason, reconnecting with horses has somehow always helped me to reconnect with myself, outside of my circumstances. I think that's probably because I have always, always been able to communicate with them better than I have ever been able to communicate with people. Lol

Well, over the course of the last several years I have lost my once vast collection of Christian music. All I could find at that time were two Third Day CD's. I hadn't listened to much of anything other than country for many years, but... I don't know... I remembered a time when listening to Third Day lifted my spirits, so I popped one in my boom box one morning while I was working the horses.

The most amazing thing happened, though it took me a few days to realize it... Lol Our indoor arena was 40x120 I believe. Huge. Every day when I would turn this song on hundreds of barn swallows would flock to the rafters of the arena and sing with the music until I turned it off when I was done. Then they would all just fly away, until the next morning. Lol

Then about a month ago I was walking my dogs down this soon to be beautiful nature trail I found not to far from my house. The snow was just starting to melt from a recent warm up. We were alone and all was quiet so I was listening to music on my headphones, thinking about stuff. I thought, "Gee, I'm all alone out here... Why am I listening to headphones?" Lol So I unplugged them and let it play.

Funny thing... Suddenly it wasn't so quiet anymore... There were four little birds that found and followed me about half way back to where we started, singing the whole way. Though many may not find that amazing... I do. Even the birds recognize His praises.

Good morning all!



Christians have their hymns and pages,
Hava Nagila's for the Jews,
Baptists have the rock of ages,
Atheists just sing the blues.
Romantics play Claire de Lune,
Born agains sing He is risen,
But no one ever wrote a tune,
For godless existentialism.
For Atheists,
There's no good news,
They'll never sing a song of faith.
For atheists,
They have a rule,
The "he" is always lowercase.
The "he" is always lowercase.
Some folks sing a Bach cantata,
Lutherans get Christmas trees,
Atheist songs add up to nada,
But they do have Sundays free.
Pentecostalists sing they sing to heaven,
Coptics have the books of scrolls,
Numerologists can count to seven,
Atheists have rock and roll.
For Atheists,
There's no good news,
They'll never sing a song of faith.
In their songs,
They have a rule,
The "he" is always lowercase.
The "he" is always lowercase.
Atheists, Atheists, Atheists,
Don't have no songs!
Christians have their hymns and pages,
Hava Nagila's for the Jews,
Baptists have the rock of ages,
Atheists just sing the blues.
Catholics dress up for Mass,
And listen to Gregorian chants.
Atheists just take a pass,
Watch football in their underpants.
Watch football in their underpants.
Atheists, Atheists, Atheists,
Don't have no songs!

Good Morning A2K! I hope y'all have a wonderful day today.
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Seven years ago today I watched you close your eyes for the last time... Wondering how I was going to see without you.

Seven years ago today I watched you take your last breath.... Wondering how I was going to continue breathing without you.

Seven years ago today I watched you slip away, and out of my life forever.

Lori, I miss you every single day... Every single breath, it feels sometimes. But I know my heart must go on. I know that is what you would have wanted for me, and I am sorry it has taken me so long to get here. I am so grateful you chose ME to be your best friend. The gifts and joy you brought into my life will live on inside my heart as long as it continues beating.



Life's Laden Way

How has my heart
Wandered this way
Of sorrow by night
Grief by day?

How laden this path
My soul follows still
The tears are heavy
With broken will

Oh heart of hearts
Find you no peace?
Staring down still
At your empty sheath

The darkness of day
Is darker than night
It closes in slowly
Suffocating the light

Yet off in the distance
A silhouette shows
Something untouched
By this wind that blows

Though it bears scars
Of neglect of years
Forgotten, misplaced?
Not watered by tears?

What is this garden
Once fresh and green
Holding such life
Now riddled by weeds?

My heart does mock
How typical this shows
Of this laden path
That my heart does go

Oh garden you know
For you bear grief too
Of things overtaken
Of what sorrow will do

Of life choked out
By these hideous things
So tell me little garden
What song do you sing?

How is it you bear
By night and by day
The loss of what was
The beauty you gave

The silence is heavy
There seems no reply
Yet over my head
Comes a butterfly

He seems not to see
Anything but what is
For it is what he needs
That this little garden gives

So sorrow upon sorrow
Grief upon grief
My heart though broken
Does finally see

Life can be found
In the midst of loss
Beauty can survive
Deaths dear cost

Written 9-19-06 by Hephzibah

Good Afternoon A2K! I hope y'all are having a good Friday! Snowing here... Still... But not sticking.... Kinda weird... These dreary days are tiring. *sigh* But a little birdie told me we may see some sunshine tomorrow! Woot woot! So, until then:

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Disclaimer: If you DO happen to listen to this one ya might find yourself tapping your foot just a little... It is quite snazzy. Lol

That was the song they sang at the bottom of the sea in Grim Fandango.