Self-Beatings???

I have an issue with mentally beating myself. For example "I am a failure!; I will never amount to anything!; What good am I?; Why am I still alive?" Things like that.

I have attempted, unsuccessfully, to change my way of thinking, however, every time something doesn't go well I am right back to that thought pattern. Some of the triggers that begin me thinking like that are ... My dead end job, My relationship, My education, Feeling/Thinking like that ... Those are just to list a few.

I guess my question is ... Should I seek professional help?

I am not sure what route to take. Me thinking like this is beginning to really effect my relationship. I don't know if I can change it. I have been thinking this way about myself for as long as I can remember. I have always thought nothing of myself. I was raised to believe that I was nothing (Ward of the State).

Yes I have and still do think about suicide, I know that isn't the answer, and that it will only make things worse for those I love. I have attempted a couple of times many years ago. I don't believe I will attempt again, however, every so often I find myself doing a Google search for suicide methods.

So back to my question ... Should I seek professional help, or should I rely on my family, (I would say friends, but I don't have any)?