GemmaS
 
Reply Sun 2 Nov, 2014 07:26 am
Hi guys, my names Gemma im 18 and i have anxiety. I started a new job a few months ago and since then its been made hell by one person a fellow co worker who tries to constantly bring me down/bullying me talking about me being rude and sarcastic and shouting and being abrupt etc with me.
I finally got the courage to tell HR about it and its getting resolved.finally i got the guts to stand up to my bullying coworker/manager but now i feel sick and horrible, why? i was upset at work and i just finally stood up to her but i feel bad now whats that about , i wasnt rude i just got my point across after the way she treated me/spoke to me she tried to turn it all around and blame it on me. She is extremely negative and difficult to approach and work with im fine with everyone else. But whilst this has been going on my anxiety has been sky high im constantly upset and cannot sleep i feel horrible.
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Type: Question • Score: 4 • Views: 1,709 • Replies: 20
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Olivier5
 
  2  
Reply Sun 2 Nov, 2014 07:43 am
@GemmaS,
You have no reason to feel that nervous. You did the right thing. That it was motivated by self-protection doesn't make it bad, if that's what bothers you. Self-protection is perfectly natural and good as long as it's not at the expense of others. ("If I am not for myself, who will? But if I am only for myself, who am I?" -- Hillel).

It was also the professional thing to do. Respect between co-workers is in the company's best interest. From what you're saying, your tormentor was undermining good team spirit and staff morale.
FBM
 
  2  
Reply Sun 2 Nov, 2014 08:09 am
@GemmaS,
I think you did very well, Gemma. You have no reason to fret, as far as I can tell. Hopefully, HR will get something worked out. In the meantime, please don't let her drag you down to her level of negativity. The fact that it makes you anxious seems to me to show that you are a caring an sensitive person, unlike that bully.
0 Replies
 
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 04:03 am
@GemmaS,
It is very sad to say that women are known to battle and they don"t cease it.

I'm a woman too and it is very embarrasing to me because men do laugh about it if they aren't embroiled .

When men do have a scuffle they stop after a certain time and let each other get out of the pillory.

Women do never ever!!!!!

Doesn't matter where women are around , as co-workers , in communities like here or where ever one's discover a crowd of women.
Specific under 45 .It is always the same game!

Not even they do care about their fight in front of men.

That causes about a competition .She want be the best, the prettiest, the slimest .....whatever.

Such attitutes you can't find amongst men.

I know , it is nearly impossible to heed my advice. . But try to be exaggarate polite toward her .

Jt would be embarrassing to her while she is annoyed and her opponent is smiling dispite and asks her ....: What do have troubles about me , or you can say ....:Can I help you.?
....Don"t trouble yourself on my account...

Even though you would love to kick off her.
You have not givs her flowers , but be above,.. do her favors and she will be ashamed about herself. Maybe she blushes in front of you for a long time.
Tekla
 
  2  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 06:40 am
@GemmaS,
When I got your text right, you told about a female co worker. Maybe she is refusing herself, because without family, doesn't get a nice boyfriend or whatever.

Wait & see when women here show up , when they tracked me out here.
They did persecute me where ever I am answering .

Then I get ugly answers containt in very large texts as a competion ,which of them German females has the best English knowledges . They are going to try to make me impressed about. But I have got an German Text which it includes at least 1 flaw.
It seems to be very satisfying to be annoying instead to post anything or to start an own discussion .

I would love to know what I have done! My own opinion or my bad English , which apparently don't women understand only ????

They uphold their reputation as a bitchalert on this way.
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 06:55 am
@Tekla,
Ich versuche nicht unfreundlich sein. Menschen haben schwierigkeiten zu verstehen ihr Englisch. I'll still chat with you though...but-- have a little patience.
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 06:55 am
@GemmaS,
Go hunt for a new job before you became sick.I know that and I feel well amongst 100 male co worker . Not the best salery could offer me a job amongst 2 women only.

Mind yours!
0 Replies
 
Olivier5
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 08:23 am
@Tekla,
Quote:
Such attitutes you can't find amongst men.

Errr.... unfortunately that's not true. But I get your point: women aren't less competitive than men; they are just competing differently
CalamityJane
 
  2  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 09:33 am
@GemmaS,
I am so sorry you had to experience bullying at work at such a young age,
but you did well and HR will take care of it and is supportive.

The anxiety you're experiencing is in the aftermath. While you're in a high stress situation your body relies heavily on Adrenalin to offset the tremendous stress situation. Now that you're relieved from the stress, anxiety sets in. Try meditation or relaxation techniques you can learn from a professional or a yoga instructor.

You are very young, chances are this job is just a stepping stone for you,
if possible you could ask to be moved to a different department.

Good luck!
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 10:10 am
@GemmaS,
I think it's courageous to stand up to a bully... Most people can't. Still--it's not comfortable. But--change never is. Congratulations!!
0 Replies
 
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 05:20 pm
@Germlat,
Very wondering , because I get answers .

They stick to the topic.

Nowhere I read , ooooh I can,t get you , Tekla. Women crudely answer too , as they get alllllllllllll .


You worry about useless things
0 Replies
 
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Mon 3 Nov, 2014 05:25 pm
@Olivier5,
GGGEEEEERRMMAT have a look , everybody understand me.

You tell garbage.

Now my answer about feminism.

The way may be different but woman are embarrasing and exposing while their fights.

Men are more under cover .

0 Replies
 
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 07:34 am
@Olivier5,
I think we have a new agent provocateur in our midst....
Olivier5
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 08:07 am
@Germlat,
Tekla? Maybe she's needs to watch Million Dollar Baby to realize women can fight a straight fight... Or maybe she's been harassed by some aggravated female for too long.
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 01:00 pm
@Olivier5,
That would be very easily to solve. Women who feel harrased by aggrevated other women have to keep beyond the circle , border of embraced , bad women.

Not always easy to shun each other, but the most time separated leads to relaxt moments who bears mutual, where is a long separation impossible.
0 Replies
 
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 01:31 pm
@Germlat,
Dear Germlat,
a very last attempt. 5 reply to my answers additional they have the same topic as me.!!!!!!!

A first evidence extra for you Germlat.

2 don't get me , by that fact happens untill I don't agree with them.

If you look around my posts you see I am right. In my post before to a guy named Izzy.......,, about galaxy, Aliens etc.there we wrote to & fro till the last post which I don"t agree.

Suddenly he has been problems to read my text. The posts before he could read.

I feel annoyed about that! To read 4 texts and the 5 th one's can read.

Germlat , why are Germans able to get many different foreigners and americans can't?

I didn't want at first to reply you Germlat anymore.

How many times do I try to explain that 5 get me here and 2 doesn't or they have to read at twice.

But you ignore my explantations about that.

If you want to do a favor for me than go translating my so weird texts and that will not be longer a problem.

Once more , 5 get me, 2 get me by reading twice and 1 doesn't get me if I don't agree.


DID YOUUUU GET ME NOW or do I have copy this and repeat over obliviousity.?
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 01:54 pm
@Tekla,
Germlat, I try to spread a part of my lines in a 2th post, because I am afraid you can' t catch such much lines.

I am sure, you have good thoughts about me, but I don't know why you don't believe me , when I say that 5 get me .Why do you care about? Why do you mean nobody gets me.?

Do you get answers about, like that: He Germlat , please help me to read the posts of Tekla.
Because I can't sleep if I don't understand the very inportant posts of Tekla ?
.
Why don't you say , I don' t care , please read the bunch of junk of Tekla yourself or read not.

Before I don't get an answer about all above I wouldn't reply. I can't reply.

That's is a very bad manner to say continiuing the same and to ignore the answers.Maybe anyone else could translate you .

Another idea, you bring that posts to elemtery school and I bet all pupils are able to do it.
I can't!



Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 02:08 pm
@GemmaS,
Sorry , I am jaded because of that senseless translations interruptings .

I just want to say that you should not be scared about women after my less positive descriptions.

If all women would be like this, the humanity would be died out.

You get a nice women and you are equiped to face the difficult women.
0 Replies
 
Tekla
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 02:15 pm
@CalamityJane,
I want not seem as a refusing person, but this advice about yoga is a risk regarding new medical researches about.
0 Replies
 
Germlat
 
  1  
Reply Tue 4 Nov, 2014 04:30 pm
@Tekla,
Has it occurred to you that people can't instantaneously answer...maybe they're at work, cooking, helping kids with homework . Also I never said nobody gets you ...I said it's difficult for most because of the sentence structure. I'm ok with that....except sometimes it seems you don't understand what I'm saying.
 

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