Billy felt the tears start to form in his eyes--Cav felt sorry for the boy, having to fight such an evil at such a tender and innocent age.
As Billy wiped the first menacing tear from his eye , he was shocked to see Cav's hand quietly rubbing his crotch while giving him such a loving smile.
Billy blinked in terror because he knew what Cav was up to and it wasnt more then 3 inches!!!
Cav screamed " WAIT! I hid a 3 inch .22 handgun in my boxers! WE ARE SAFE!! Commeeee baaaaccck!I love you!"
Cav thought to himself "What is it with me and the gay jokes...doesn't anyone realize that the clergy didn't accept me because I'm not gay or a pedophile?"
Billy , remembering the catholic churchs' refusal of cav suddenly stopped in his tracks.
"Billy, they want to kill you in order to make Soylent Green, a dietary supplement funded by a corrupt governement that is made from HUMANS...Billy, watch a movie once in a while, and take this cookbook, where they got the recipe, 'To Serve Man'.
Billy looks down at the book and noticed that the copyright was owned by Keanu Reeves.
"....And here's another cookbook, --- it's called called How to Cook For Humans ...Or is that "How to Cook Forty Humans?"
"Billy, just so you know, Mr. Canoehead, as we refer to Keanu Reeves in Canada, usurped that copyright from Rod Serling after he killed him..."
"Was Rod Sterling an ingredient in this book?" asked billy..scared.
"That's something the authorities are not quite sure of yet Billy....if you want to stay safe, I would also avoid your uncle, Captain Highliner."
" But ol'e Cap still to this DAY claims he is a vegeterian?"
"Arrgh Billy," Cap'n said, "all that means is that I don't eat fish."
Billy, having had dispelled his thouights of Cav's being homosexual, was dismayed to see him standing there in what looked like a sailor suit; 'why are you wearing that,' he asked.
"It was on sale, Billy, give it up already."
'Well, I suppose that it is fetching in its own way,' Billy said, coming too close to Cav for comfort to inspect the fabric.
The Pettigrews approached slowly, smiling as if there were nothing out of the ordinary, just another sunny sunday morning out in the neighborhood, and Cav pulled his gun out, ready for anything.
