When I sit and watch the surf.....................

It creates a visceral image that I can feel, and for that it's well done, but it doesn't connect me with those stricken souls. It seems in that respect incomplete.

Not sure if you want a interpretation or not.

I think it is a sad poem as I visualize lost souls who have become mentally or physically challenged individuals, and although they drew the small straw in life, they are still hoping that there is more to life than just this.

Makes me think of a sunken ship.

It's evocative! Reminds me a novel I read a few years ago by Jim Crace. Also a powerful evocation of death and loss--and what is recalled of those who are gone...

D'art, Suzy, colorbook, edgar,

This was an experiment in writing between oldandknew and me. I started a line, and he added another until the poem was complete.

It was done in the space of a few minutes, and I was curious to see if it touched a nerve with anyone who is into original writing.

If you have pen pals, try it yourself as it becomes a wonderful exercise in mental acuity and a crucible for staying psychologically alive.

Thank you so much, my friends, for your input.

Good morning
From Florida

Cool! it came out very well!
I may try that!

Suzy, oftentimes, just a phrase can lead to something spectacular, and it doesn't have to be just poetry, either. It could be an essay or philosophy. The beauty of the "add-a-line" bit, is that you find, not only common interests, but opposing views as well.

Letty, it turned out very well. It seemed as if great thought had been put into each word to accomplish the effect.

Thank you, colorbook, and although I can't speak for the Brit, I think he will relish all the input.

I was trying to compose my thoughts on this before I posted a response..

To be honest, I found this a bit difficult to read - I have read it several times, but am still unable to evoke the imagery which you are trying to portray.

Maybe it is because I have a very fixed image of the surf and this poem was not able to overwrite it in my brain...

I always see the surf as a lover, trying to draw the shore, its reluctant amor into its embrace. Failing everytime, but never giving up

Sorry Letty, but this is the first time it did not cut it for me

Gautam, my dear. You don't have to identify with every piece of verse, and frankly, I appreciate diverse opinions. It adds texture to any poem and makes one understand the motley character of nature.

well the piece is abstract. Coz there were no pre-conceived ideas with any of it, after the 1st line, it can be read in many ways and with many diferent meanings.

The range of comments show that. so Letty & the Brit might do an encore.

Encore, encore!

Very interesting idea.

Well, do hope that Letty and London can leave all of you with lots of lines and lyrics.

Hey, Soz. You try it, too.

Checking in Letty--I'll be back.

Diane, I would love to see you and dys do a duo, too. When you do, please post it here. Fascinating how it turns out.

Letty, I found it to be very evocative of my experience with the ocean and the thoughts it brings to mind.

Often I've wondered about all the sunken ships filled with optimistic passengers who drowned---their relatives ignorant of the tragedy for, sometimes, months.

I've wondered what their thoughts must have been as they died, seeing the sun from underneath the water, watching the fish swim by in their element.

Death was a much closer aquaintence in the days of the wooden ships--that's what your and Oak's poem brought to mind.

Yes, honey. That's why the Titanic still is an obsession with many from all over the world.

The ocean is indeed, a succubus. I often think of Byron and his proclamation. He would not be pleased.

Love you Letty. Let's have some more shared minds poetry.