I really do enjoy being me

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I'd hate to be most other people actually.

I was driving down the street earlier, and a guy in front of me was on a Vespa. My neighbor mentioned he'd like to get one.
So at a light where I was going to turn right, and he was going straight, I pulled up next to him, rolled down the window and said "Those Vespas are really cute. How much do they go for?"

He gave me this look, then looked forward again and said "You're not supposed to do that. This is one lane and I'm in it.
Me: Oh. Well there's plenty of room, and I'm turning right anyway. So what do they cost?
Him: That's against the law.
Me: Ok..... So you won't tell me what they cost?
Him: I bought it used.
Me: What does a used one run?
Him: I don't remember.
Me: You don't remember what you paid for that? Ok, well, good luck with getting that stick out of your ass.

Then I turn right and toodled away.

I mean, I wouldn't be that guy for all the tea in china.

Do you like being you?

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Well, i don't enjoy being you, and i wish you'd stop doing that to me.

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Yes, for SURE!

I woud not trade with anyone.
Thru out my life, I have not been happy with my appearance,
but sometimes I 've had that thawt in public,
stopped in traffic, and I've observed that I 'm surrounded
by pedestrians that look a hell of a lot WORSE.

Its good to count our blessings; its fun.

David

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The only time I don't enjoy being me is when I open the mailbox and have to pay the bill that addressed to me, then I want to be someone else.

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@chai2,

I like and enjoy me pretty well. Even my exes (not paying them any alimony) still talk to me, too. Though I can't always reach them on the phone at the funny farms to where they've moved. It depends on how good my funny farm is about giving my phone privileges.

I appreciate your story. To me that is pretty priceless.

Something along those lines happened to me..not the same but same sort of dynamics.

I live in a large apartment complex (450 people w/ some college students) with wrap around driveway/parking lot. A young man was toodling around the lot on a unicycle. I asked him whether or not he was saving up so that he could by the rest of the bike soon. He didn't laugh or even comment. I felt cheated.

Maybe he was too busy concentrating, huh?

2 Replies

@Ragman,

Oh yeah raggsy, you get it completely.

Actually, by the time he told me what I was doing was illegal (where's a cop when you need one?) I was just jerking his chain. This is on a pretty quite street, Mary Street, that ends at a light.
I mean, Rik the Goat used to live on that street Rik's got his own Facebook page. There's a herbalist-slash-healing psychic on that street. There's the Soup Peddler soup place. For years there used to be a dog grooming place called "Doggie Styles" And all that's within 2 blocks. Don't get me started on the rest of the street.
All this atmosphere, and he thinks there's not enough room for a Vespa & Corolla to share a lane?

Lighten up, will ya?

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We can all enjoy being ourselves, until the aliens come and take over our bodies.

2 Replies

@Foofie,

I think you're circling out there in orbit already, Foofie!

1 Reply

@CalamityJane,

CalamityJane wrote:

I think you're circling out there in orbit already, Foofie!

You're being metaphorical, I take it, Watson?

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@Foofie,

Foofie wrote:

We can all enjoy being ourselves,
until the aliens come and take over our bodies.

The Mexicans ?

0 Replies

@Ragman,

Ragman wrote:

I like and enjoy me pretty well. Even my exes (not paying them any alimony) still talk to me, too. Though I can't always reach them on the phone at the funny farms to where they've moved. It depends on how good my funny farm is about giving my phone privileges.

I appreciate your story. To me that is pretty priceless.

Something along those lines happened to me..not the same but same sort of dynamics.

I live in a large apartment complex (450 people w/ some college students) with wrap around driveway/parking lot. A young man was toodling around the lot on a unicycle. I asked him whether or not he was saving up so that he could by the rest of the bike soon. He didn't laugh or even comment. I felt cheated.

Maybe he was too busy concentrating, huh?

That was a nice little joke.

David

0 Replies

@chai2,

Right now I'm in one of those countries where lines of the road have no meaning. Maybe that guy should come here. I've seen scooters, motorcycles, rickshaws (enclosed three wheelers with a small engine), vans, buses and a camel all share the highway at the same time.

1 Reply

@engineer,

engineer wrote:

Right now I'm in one of those countries where lines of the road have no meaning. Maybe that guy should come here. I've seen scooters, motorcycles, rickshaws (enclosed three wheelers with a small engine), vans, buses and a camel all share the highway at the same time.

LOUD, very LOUD, as I remember.
The law required blasting the horn every time
your cab approached a car, a truck, or a bus; too noisy.

David

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@chai2,

Quote:

Ok, well, good luck with getting that stick out of your ass.

Nice - I like that.

I can think of about a billizillion people I would hate to be. Off the top of my head - my crazy neighbor. I mean to think on my facebook page I put my two favorites things as walking my dog and walking my dog while listening to music. Besides her being crazy - is that all that is important to you? Not your husband, not your daughters but walking your dog?

And also the person(s) who is/are going to say billizillion isn't a word and all the others that will get great enjoyment pointing out spelling and improper grammar here - yeah I'd hate to be them too.

I will add as is necessary.

1 Reply

@chai2,

The guy on the Vespa was an engineer. Don't ask how I know; I just know.

1 Reply

@roger,

Software engineer.

1 Reply

@DrewDad,

roger and DrewDad, you are both so right!

Actually, totally not kidding, he looked like Napoleon Dynamites brother Kip.

http://www.socialtechpop.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/kip2.jpg

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@Linkat,

Linkat wrote:

And also the person(s) who is/are going to say billizillion isn't a word and all the others that will get great enjoyment pointing out spelling and improper grammar here - yeah I'd hate to be them too.

I will add as is necessary.

That reminds me of this woman who would say things lie "boo-koodles" for a whole bunch of something.

As in "ya'll there's boo-koodles of of those brochures left over, I'm fixin' to just trash them all.

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I really do enjoy being me

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