18
   

Girls and Ladies? How do you react to being called Ma'am?

 
 
margo
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 01:42 pm
@ossobuco,
ossobuco wrote:

My own wrinkles have multiplied in the last year. Astonishing, really. So it goes, as Vonnegut would say.

Does that coincide with any improvement in your eyesight?

I've always been surprised that I don't have wrinkles - but then my eyesight is crap! I was thinking of going the dog and stick route, but those bloody dogs are too honest!

And to the friend that sent me the magnifying mirror for my birthday - Thanks, but there's something wrong with it - it shows some old dame, definitely not me, when I use it. Musta been a bad batch!
roger
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 08:51 pm
@margo,
In a similar vein, I got along with more people before I got a hearing aid than after. Is it age, or really knowing what they've been saying all this time?
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 08:56 pm
@ossobuco,
Osso roars. You go to a site where people are supposed be following your plans.

Usually it is hi, Roger, what's going on. I expect, hi, jo, we have trouble over here.... after which we talk about it.


Don't ******* call me a girl or lady on site.
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 08:57 pm
@roger,
I dunno Roger - It seems my dad got to a point where he figured he had earned the right to say what he thought regardless of anyone's feelings about the subject. It can be both hilarious and embarrassing at times. He wasn't like that up until around 67 years old though. Smile He can be a bit abrasive these days...but, I have always liked that in an older man.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 09:02 pm
@ossobuco,
My business partner was better at this, but I wasn't a walk over.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 09:08 pm
@margo,
Margo, I don't need the enhanced fonts.
But thank you for the thought.

This reminds me of Milton.. whom I wonder about. He struggled here.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 09:15 pm
@margo,
Margo, we can talk...
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 10:42 pm
@ossobuco,
I suppose I need to add roger is smarter.
Sometimes.
margo
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 10:49 pm
@ossobuco,
ossobuco wrote:

I suppose I need to add roger is smarter.


Smarter than.....?
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Tue 14 Sep, 2010 10:52 pm
@margo,
well, me.

sometimes,
at least we listen.
0 Replies
 
Finn dAbuzz
 
  1  
Reply Wed 15 Sep, 2010 04:17 pm
@ossobuco,
ossobuco wrote:

Well, I've many times been the one to ok whether or not my firm's designs were approved as carried out, and the follow through of my non approval - and, honey, I don't like to be called, hey or hello lady.

You are in your own world, Finn.

The use of "honey" (outside of personal relationships) by any gender is interesting. When men use it, it connotes dismissal and women (rightly) react negatively. When women use it, it connotes anger, and, frankly, men couldn't care less (there's that sexist dismissal I suppose).

In any case honey, (and I employ the term only with affection) I really don't get your point.

Of course you don't want to be called "Hey lady," that was MY point.

Do you have a problem with being called Ma'am? In 99.9% of the time the term is used with respect. Certainly anywhere below the Mason-Dixon line.

I think I can appreciate why some women, from a perspective of vanity, might not appreciate Ma'am, but I don't give a whole lot of credence to opinions informed by vanity.

My own narrow world is, btw, amazingly similar to the broader one in which we live: Women don't want to be called "Hey Lady," and Ma'am is a term of respect. Maybe OssoWorld is on a parallel plane we dimensions removed.
Pemerson
 
  3  
Reply Wed 15 Sep, 2010 09:10 pm
The only time I was extremely offended by names people call women was a nasty little old lady who was the bookkeeper at an uppity furniture store where I worked in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. She called me gal. I felt like killing her but instead I said, "Don't you ever call me that word again, gal." Same lady used to think we didn't know she listened in on our phone conversations, reported to the boss.

When we first moved to Texas, walked into one of those quicky stores and asked a guy behind the counter where something was (forget what) and he said. "Well, baby girl, follow me and I'll show you." Gosh, it was so funny I couldn't get angry. Now, I call my two cats baby girl. They talk this way, those old Texans who've been nowhere else.

I remember being raised down here the kids were expected to say "yes ma'am, no'mam" to all the older people. My husband says they still do, on the golf course where he works.
roger
 
  1  
Reply Thu 16 Sep, 2010 01:56 pm
@Pemerson,
You're worrying your purty little head over nothing, little lady.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 16 Sep, 2010 02:10 pm
@Finn dAbuzz,
No, I don't mind being called ma'am.
The 'honey' was a bit of an in joke to myself and to you, Finn.
I actually agree with all this, except the Barbara Boxer part, which is likely why I was being snide:

"Only a self-absorbed idiot like Barbara Boxer has a problem with it.
In all but the rarest of occassions, it is a term of respect.
If you have a vanity problem with your age and don't like it, it's your issue.
Would you rather be addressed as "Hey Lady?"

I think it's reasonable she would demand to be called Senator, though I can see she would be taken to be "touchy" about it, as I could have been taken as, re "ladies" back in my days of "job site observation". I didn't correct the guys that called us that, as I didn't really take it as a meant insult - just that that kind of thing could be, if said tauntingly. Remember, I'm pre (just pre, but pre) civil rights changes, when they actually opened the gates to let women study law and medicine.


I suppose this all brings up the temptress in the teapot that is the New York Jets' locker room..
0 Replies
 
Ceili
 
  1  
Reply Thu 16 Sep, 2010 02:20 pm
Just my observation, but Maam is not commonly used here in Western Canada, or at least not in the cities, but it does seem to be getting more popular. Cowboy or country folk use it more. Generally directed at older women. The first time someone called me Maam, I almost punched 'em.
I've learned to reign that feeling in, especially when I'm in the States. I figure they can't possibly now how I feel about it, and they are only being polite...
I prefer people introduce themselves and call me by my name. Not always possible I know.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 16 Sep, 2010 02:25 pm
Yes, me too, re calling me by my name - which in the situations I described, we usually knew.

I just looked up Boxer, she's a year older than I am, poor ol' thing. So, also from the pre civil rights changes era.
0 Replies
 
Pemerson
 
  1  
Reply Fri 17 Sep, 2010 07:26 pm
@roger,
roger wrote:

You're worrying your purty little head over nothing, little lady.

Are you saying that tauntingly, sir?
mismi
 
  2  
Reply Fri 17 Sep, 2010 07:47 pm
If you are in the south saying ma'am is a sign of respect. Children are frowned upon who don't say it to their elders. Aw hell, the fact is, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.

Truly - everyone has their own spin on what is acceptable and if they are going to get their panties in a wad every time they get called something they don't like I expect they are going to be uncomfortable a whole lot.
tsarstepan
 
  2  
Reply Fri 17 Sep, 2010 08:02 pm
@mismi,
Do you mind if I derive an interesting implication from your thesis mismi?

That this learned/developed oversensitivity to these age/gender based social titles is really a manufactured product shoved down our throats by the Panty Industrial Complex! Shocked
mismi
 
  1  
Reply Fri 17 Sep, 2010 08:05 pm
@tsarstepan,
Derive away Tsar Very Happy
0 Replies
 
 

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