Stress Relievers?

I have no kids so take this advice for what it's worth -

If he's accident-prone, you might want to be proactive and remove/cushion things which might break. Check for hazards. You can't change everything (e. g. disconnecting the stove isn't an option), but you can move your porcelain figurines or things like that. I wouldn't go nuts trying to think of every contingency because you can't think of everything. Plus, he might not like if things are too sanitized (Don't you trust me, Mom?). But I don't see at all anything wrong with a little accident-proofing.

As for him traveling, can you hire a traveling companion? Perhaps it's too late for this - but at least can you alert the airline and the airport so that they know what they might need to do if there's an emergency? You probably won't need them, but that should give you some peace of mind.

cobalt -- I know a few parents who manage to accept the old adage of 'out of sight, out of mind'. I am, however, not one of them. I am a serious worrier and both my adult kids know it. They are kind enough to tolerate this and even sweet enough to make that phone call when they know I'm probably in a severe state of worry. For this I am eternally grateful and because of it I try very, very hard not to overdo it.

Both are now in serious relationships and that's helped a little. I know they're not alone and that they've found someone who shares good and bad with them (and is willing to put up with the annoying traits that drive me nuts when they're home too long). Makes me a little jealous sometimes (I don't admit that much, but it does), but it also has relieved a little of the pressure from me. And it makes me grateful that

I've just been very honest with them -- I worry a lot about them and I can't help it because that's what I think mothers do. My mother worried about all 7 of us; I have just as much worry but only 2 of them to divide it between. They accept it as a 'given', try to alleviate my worry as much as possible, and give me a lecture when I'm overdoing it.

Sorry I couldn't be more helpful; as I said, I think that's what mothers do. And we joke about it alot, too -- that seems to make it easier for them and for me.

Hi and thanks for writing. My son made it here by plane last night and has been sick since with the virus / flu he brought with him. It was quite a picture to get him off in a wheelchair and then get the luggage and then to the car. The Armadillo carried him straight up to bed and he's been "down since". But, I think it is turning the corner now, as he is watching TV and starting to make "requests", LOL! All moms know that turning point for sick kids.

Now, I have to slowly start the transition to treating him as an adult... hard to do when he arrived sick. But, Jespah, I hear your words, here, lol! I still wonder if others will be replying to this post and / or the poll. It also would be interesting if some men replied as well. Would love to hear different takes on this "worry" over adult children.

I don't have it so bad with the oldest son, but the 2 younger ones...

Cobalt, Spoil him until he squeals! My kids love that to a point. When we reach it I stop.

I never cease to be concerned about them &
their safety. My oldest daughter and her hubby
and my 2 precious darling grandchildren are
driving up towards Pittsburgh, PA from SC
Friday & there are going to be heavy rains. I
don't tell her how much I really DO fear for
all of their safety, as this could be insulting,
implying that a 35 year old woman is stupid
or that I have no faith in her abilities.So I do
make every effort to let her know that I DO
have faith in their abilities in parenting.

I REALLY would appreciate finding a
rational, balanced and peaceful
outlook on the entire issue...it DOES
get to me, and more often than I
care to talk about.
In Buddhism - they speak of the
ATTACHMENT, as being the source
of the pain.....so it is clearly up to me
to let go.......
Why am I stalling? Is their welfare any
better from my worrying? I do doubt
that. So how do we move on, from
this place we find ourselves a little
stuck in?