@dlowan,
Me and Telstra (the major Telephone provider) some time ago when I attempted to buy broadband internet services from them.
The deal is negotiated, and we are about to have me pay the first month's fees over the phone, when a problem occurs in relation to sending me the modem.
T=the Telstra rep.
M= moi
T: Now...the address where we send the modem...that would be your home address?
M: I assume your couriers do not deliver on weekends?
T: No, they don't.
M: Ok...would they deliver to work?
T: Sure!! What's the work address;
M: Moi,
XXX Service,
Level x
x building
xxx X Road
XXX Adelaide
T: I am afraid that won't fit in my box.
M I beg your pardon?
T I can't type all that in the box provided.
M Well, can you write outside the box?
T No, it's a computer box, it won't let me.
M Well, can you CALL your despatch section, and give them the address verbally?
T No.
M What?
T No, I can't.
M I am talking to the biggest telecommunications company in Australia and you are unable to telephone your despatch centre?
T Yes.
M Yes you can, or yes you can't?
T Yes I can't.
M Can I ring them?
T yes.
M So, I can call them and give them the address?
T No, but you can call them and they will be able to tell you where the package is!
M They can tell me where the package IS, but I can't tell them where it NEEDS TO be?
T yes.
M What good is that?
T You'll know where the modem is!!!
M But, unless the modem and I intersect, that is of no earthly good to me.
T Well, yes, I can see the problem.
M Because, without the modem, I can't get the service I am paying for.
T Yes. Could we use a smaller address?
M Certainly, however, with a smaller address, the courier won't find me.
T Why?
M It's a big, multi-building, higgle piggledy piggledy hospital. I get lost. Everyone gets lost.
T Can we deliver to your stores area?
M No...they get very angry when private goods are delivered there...and they likely won't accept it, and I will get yelled at. If they can find me.
T Oh, I see.
.....silence while I wait for a solution from T.......
M So...you're telling that me that you won't take the money I was happily about to give you because a computer box isn't big enough?
T Ummmmmmm
M Can I speak with a supervisor?
T Why?
M Well, I am hoping that, somewhere in your company, there may be someone who can either make your computer boxes bigger, or who is able to speak to your despatch department.
T Hold please ma'am.
T Lengthy bad music, infomercials, and assurances that, despite my big address, i am important to them.
T I have spoken to my supervisor and she says you can call the despatch department.
M And give them the address?
T No...but they can tell you where your package is!!!
M But I cannot make the package and me be in the same place?
T Ummmmm
M Well, I am sorry, but I am unable to give you my money then.
T Pardon me?
M I am cancelling the agreement.
T What?
M If I cannot access the service I am paying for I will not pay for it.
T Oh
T What can I give as the reason for your cancellation today ma'am?
M Your box is too small.
I am off to find a providor with a bigger box.
T. Ummmmm...
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