Talking to kids about puberty

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Damn I reach this point - my daughter's doctor informed me that my daughter could start her period as early as next year. Now how to have the talk....

My daughter and I don't seem to have a problem discussing much of anything so I don't anticipate the discussion itself to be the problem (other than she will say ugg stop telling when I go to far in depth about such things - like how do babies come out of the mother).

Just how do you start and the best way to explain things - I also want to get enough information out to her before she tries to stop me. She really does like the "gross" stuff, but she will need this information. She does have a book that talks about puberty and other things girls go through at that age - the period stuff is at the end so I am not sure if she read it. And she has asked me questions about some of things in the book.

Maybe I should read the book - I've only browsed it and haven't looked at the period stuff yet myself.

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You could put into nice words that she hasn't far to go before she breaks into the mother-lode in the goldmine and the seam is so rich in ore that there's a danger of going at it too greedily and it sweeping her away in an avalanche to the valley below where all the other boulders have come to rest. Assets can become toxic with excess leverage.

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@Linkat,

Oh Linkat, that reminds me of my daughter's "first time" - she was so excited
and came running telling me of her great fortune. Of course, at that point she
thought it would come around once a year only.

Somewhere along the line she either stopped listening to me or got that miss information someplace else.

We started out with a question since my daughter saw a commercial about
tampax. We then looked up a teen website where they show explicit pictures how the female cycle operates every month. I forget the site (I will look for it)
but it was very informative and in addition to my explanations, she pretty much
got the picture (except the once-a-year thingy).

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Start by asking her what she already knows?

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@spendius,

huh?

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@CalamityJane,

She already stopped me in my explanation of how a baby is actually born. I don't think she could handle the explicit graphics.

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@DrewDad,

That may be a good start - that way I'll know how much she has read and if her friends have talked about it.

I know they have talked about bras and stuff - and that reminds me of another thread I'll have to start.

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@Linkat,

Look here they have an entire kit for young girls - quite cute!
http://grownupgirl.net/periodpak.html

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@CalamityJane,

Oh thanks - that looks great. I reminder getting something like this from school when I was in the fifth grade.

It scared me to think that one of the testimonials from a school nurse said that girls have gotten their periods as young as the second grade!

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I wish someone had told me earlier that tampons are for females only.

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@CalamityJane,

And by the way - you are looking especially beautiful today.

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@Linkat,

Is that a tampon on your head, Linkat?

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@Green Witch,

You mean its not supposed to go on your head?

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@Linkat,

Oy, no wonder that Missy Linkat is confused Laughing

I think I have whiskers....and Gargamal finally got some macho shoulders.

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I knew almost nothing besides a palid movie, except that on a girl scout trip to some Wisconsin lodge (we lived near Chicago) a girl in seventh grade held up her bloody pants like a flag. Hah, I still remember her name.

Mine didn't happen until eighth grade, and was more dramatic. It was also on a girl scout outing, this time to washington, dc. (I was not a scout enthusiast, badges not my thing even then). Anyway, I got my first period while climbing the washington monument, turned around after many hundreds of steps, say, 496, and walked back down (others rode the elevator) and retired to the bathroom, what a mess, all the while a bus waited for me and the parent supervisors freaked.

I figure now that this was iconic.

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@ossobuco,

So the lesson of the day - girl scout trips cause the onset of periods.

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well the way my mother told me...im only 13 so i remember really well!!! trust me! but my mom took me shoping and let me buy lots of stuff and had lots of fun no one was home but us and when we got home she told me we need to have a talk and seh told me about herself and what happend. WHATEVER YOU DO I WOULD NOT ASK ABOUT WHAT SHE KNOWS!!! it is really embarassing to me at least to tell you parent about what youknow about this stuff!!! you may love them but like we hate doing this sooooooo make her happy at first and tell her about this stuff then ask her to show off what she just got when she went shoping!!!

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@Fairy Beary,

Thank you so much - it is very helpful to hear it from the teen's perspective. I do not want to embarass her or make her feel uncomfortable. I do want to make her feel as if she can talk with me about it.

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Well, I talked to her. Not in the way I had planned though. She was complaining about her stomach hurting, but not like she would throw up. I was concerned it could be cramping and although the doctor thought the earliest she would start would be 11, I figured you never can tell for sure.

She didn't seem at all embarassed. I even said she might have read about it in her book - she said it wasn't in there, however, when I read the reviews it did say it addressed it. So I said I'd take a look and see where it was in the book so she could also read about it. I gave her some Motrin and it seemed to help the pain.

Not sure if it was cramps or just nerves - she tends to get tummy aches due to nerves and they do have testing this week.

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Talking to kids about puberty

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