Rape is a criminal act. If a man is raped, does anyone ever wonder if his sexy underwear is a come on? What about strip clubs, do patrons ever drag a stripper from the stage to the floor to give her what she really wants? I don't think that's how it works, the bouncers take a dim view of men deciding their 'needs' trump the performance.
It's a very twisted view that any man knows better than the female exactly what she wants. If you want a partner who always let's you decide what she needs, hire a pro you cheap ass creep.