"YABBER-LINER" - ALL ABOARD

Hey Whiteviolet...

Good to see you girl. How are you? The Cathedral is beautiful - lighting a candle there is a lovely thing to do. Take care T. x

Hi, I couldn't have had a worse Christmas, thx!

Very exciting arrangements for Christmas Eve/Christmas were cancelled at short notice, which disappointed me a very great deal, so had to resign myself to spending Christmas alone, woke up with very bad cold and cough, plus earache, on Christmas Day, so had to stay in bed most of the day, then my son in Hawaii who was due to ring for a couple of hours on Christmas Day, and who is always soooooo reliable, emailed to say his skype had run out so am still waiting to talk to him! Have also lost my rather nice watch this week which I only bought a couple of months ago.

Just had a power cut tonight, luckily back on now, and a friend I really, really wanted to see this Monday has emailed this evening that he is ill now, too, so we have to postpone! Oh well, pleasures to come, I suppose, but wanted to meet up with people during the vacation - we go back in a week. Urgently need document from university computers to work on this weekend, remote access isn't working so popped in to library- only to find no computers working there and no IT staff until Monday - just security staff who can't help.

All trivia I know compared to what some are going through but it mounts up! Looking forward to my daughter coming to stay in 10 days though.

Now lights gone again! Oh, come back again, obviously going to be one of those nights.

Love to all, Tricia x

Oh Tricia...I am so sorry. It sounds like you did have a hard time of it at Christmas. Is your cold any better? So sorry about not getting to talk to your son...I can imagine that was disappointing. The pic you posted of the cathedral is beautiful. You are such a thoughtful person...I hope it gets better and better - and that the lights come back soon! Hugs to you dear...
mis

some new visitors to the feeders
purple finches



as you can see, snow not quite gone but going quickly

Hi folks, a connecting flight afforded me an opportunity to come visit with y’all, and such merriment was to be had; including the one from MM…


“Sorry I havent posted, but I really havent had anything to say that would interest anyone.”

Sage advice indeed, but sentiment that has never stopped me pontificating!

My jubilation however evaporated on the next page with his extremely sad news of a young life tragically cut short.

My condolences go out to those touched by such traumatic circumstances.
Although I do not know MM or the family, I do know that any words conveyed in heartfelt support; and mercifully it is to be found in abundance amongst this crew, can be a help at times like these.

Even though I am more akin to a stowaway on this passage and not exactly the praying kind; after a disagreement over the timing of the Parousia. May I say that you, and those involved will draw great comfort from the knowledge that the donated organs will sustain life in others and improve the quality of life in many more.

I believe no one is lost to us if we carry a fondness for them in our hearts, and I hope the results of the post mortem will answer the question; why?




Best wishes to all the rest of you, I hope all went well and any tribulations were swiftly overcome by the tide of optimism.

Sorry I missed your birthday Dutchy; I’ll know better next year.

BLUE! Wise words. So good to see you. Missed you. So glad you are here. x

Oh... so sorry Tricia...

I hope you are feeling better now - and yes, it does mount up. So good to see you posting tho hun. Hope you managed to talk with HI son. What's causing the power cuts? Take care girl, and jump back on when you can. Lighting a candle will be a lovely gesture. Hoping you will find some peace there too hun. x

DjjD - can hardly believe all the snow has gone. Those boids are lovely. I went and filled my feeders today - there's a wee robin that's popping by but he's a little skittish too - will try and get a pic of him. There's a naughty squirrel too.......... cheeky bugger gets the bottom of the feeder and empties it out. Can but laugh tho - he's really clever.

Hey cap'n, you seen my tiger, I wanna go fishin...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgfIPUAQ6fQ&feature=related

(hugs)

Good afternoon all.
Stacy is with her mom and her brother Jason, making the arrangements for Kaines funeral.
All we know right now is that Kaine had a heart attack.
Somehow, associating "heart attack" with a 14 year old boy just doesnt make sense.

That was the preliminary autopsy results, we will know more in a couple of weeks when all of the test results come back.
There are already stories flying around town about his death.
Everything from he overdosed to he committed suicide.
I have told Cody (Stacy's 13 year old son) to ignore anything he hears from anyone that isnt part of the family.

Kaines mother Augusta will be able to attend the funeral.
She has been in prison most of Kaines life, but she has been as good a mom as was possible under the circumstances.
She would call him at least once a week, she would send him pictures of herself, and did everything she could to be a part of his life.
The bad thing is that she will be shackled while at the service.

Now, I need some advice.
Since Kaine died, Stacy has been with her brothers and sister, along with the rest of her family members.
SAhe seems to have forgotten about me.
Granted, I married into this family, but I knew Kaine for 5 years, and he lived with Stacy and I for 3 of those years.
She seems to have forgotten about the fact that I am also experiencing grief.
She has her family to rally around for support, but I seem to be sitting on the outside looking in, and it hurts.

Am I wrong to be feeling that way,?

No, you are not wrong for feeling MM, but she will come back around.

She is overwhelmed, and used to depending on you for support.

Stay strong and be patient.

(much sympathy to you all)

J - hunni... if I were you right now...I would go over to Jason's house. Just quiet - let them know you are there. Stacy is consumed with grief - she will not be able to think straight - or see anything outside of Jason right now I would imagine. IMO.... only my opinion hun, she will be trying to keep control whatever feelings she has inside her - and watching Jason right now.

No.... you are not wrong for feeling the way do. As Rock says - strong and patient - you are hurting too and you need Stacy to understand your feelings - but, having seen someone I care deeply about, lose their partner - the grief is overwhelming and there is no "one way" to do it.... the only way is "their" way - and Stacy, I doubt right now, can think about anything outside of what is spinning around in her head. As you say, she near as much rasied Kaine.... along with Cody.... I would imagine that all she can do is look for the person that is closest to Kaine - to feel that closeness to Kaine. I think that is completely natural for her to do.... I also think that you're feelings are completely natural - you are suffering the grief too and you want her to be there for you - but right now J, she can't. Hunni - if I were you - I would go to her - to them as a family - and just sit, make tea, just be there for them - be part of their grieving, be part of the family - as you are. When Cody comes home - you need to be strong for him too - like we were talking about - his loss is going to immense and he won't know how or what to do.

Maybe I shouldn't write all this here.... I dunno - it's just my immediate thoughts.

When you are trying to deal with grief - everyone has their own way. Stacy won't be cutting you out on purpose - I really believe that she just won't be able to deal with anyone's but her own, possibly Jason's grief, right now. There is no right or wrong for her, or for you - think about going to them - being at the house - and give her time to try and come to terms with what's happened. Sometimes, it's harder to go to the people/person you love - because then you lose your composure, you lose your strength if you let that person feel what you are feeling - you want to grieve with her.... right now, maybe she just isn't able grieve with you - if she does, she may lose her strength that she is giving to Jason. Do you see what I'm saying? She may not be able to comfort Cody either... she may not be able to comfort anyone..... that's not wrong... it's grief... and it's hard and there are no answers...

I can phone you J .... just email me if you want me to... talk to us, we can listen - but talk to Stacy and let her know too.... quietly... just quietly... let her know - go and be with the family - it is your family too - perhaps it will help you too.

There is no wrong in how any of you are feeling. You have to deal with what's happened the best way you can...

my love to you all out there. x

Oh M.M. I can't imagine how you are feeling. It has to be an unbelievable weight though. I think Izzie's right - Stacy is just doing what she has to - she is not thinking outside her grief. Do go and be with them. Just being there grieving with them is a help in and of itself. It brings unity.

When my husbands Mom died, he cut me out too...I soon learned that is just how he dealt with his grief...he had no clue how I felt. All I could do was be there if he needed me and that was enough. It felt lonely at times to be sure - but I just kept reminding myself that I was there to support - even though I was grieving as well...it just wasn't the same way.

Hugs to you and your family - thoughts and prayers continue your way.
mis

Nothing additional to add, MM, other than to join the chorus of those saying that your grief is as real as everyone else's and being in the same time and space as the rest of the family will allow you to express your own sadness while helping them deal with theirs.

There is always speculation about young, unexpected death. You're right to advise Cody not to take that stuff on-board. If he feels he needs to respond to questions then he can simply say that there are no answers yet. No one is entitled to get answers to private family matters. He should not feel obligated or compelled to say anything to anyone.

Continued condolences to you, Stacy, Jason, Cody and the rest of Kaine's loved ones. I agree with tryagain -- he will always live on in your hearts.

Dear MM. Your words leap off the page, across the miles, and your situation has really echoed in my heart. I send you the warmest vibes I can.

Grieving is so complex and when mixed with such shock as your family have suffered it is ungovernable. Anything you feel and do is ok and any needs you feel are absolutely justifiable. Yes, like the others, I think you should go quietly and be with Stacy and the family.

I'd like to say that someone in my family was a prison officer who had to attend occasional funerals and I am sure everything will be done sensitively to ensure minimal intrusion, within the basic rules that will have to be kept to. Prison officers have families too and they do understand.

Take care of yourself and your loved ones. You will know by now just how much this crew care. Tricia x

Hey...

I’m afraid I needed some to do the camera thing today - I sat for hours in silence today just watching these little fellas....well, just listening to the birds... they sound so sweet... it was soooo soooo cold .... so cold... there’s a lot of pics... sorry... can’t do just one! They aren't focused - camera's not good enough sadly and are a distance away - and they are so darn skittish - but here's some of the boids from Izland.

Robins, greats and blue's!





















Bottoms up!






Who are you lookin' at a?

Beautiful!

Beautiful pictures Izzie, you must be a patient woman capturing those lively birds, brightens this page.

i too have been visited recently by a friendly robin - nice pictures Izzie

Thanku crew.... and welcome onboard Endy mate. Jump onboard anytime you wish x

I'm off to zzzzzzzzzzzzz - if my brain will permit the shutdown - gone to find a dreamcatcher - may he bestow something beautiful for me tonite - busy day ahead tomorrow and need some beauty sleep major league...

laters taters

Love y'all crew. x

MM - and those who need the hugs.......... ((((((((((((((((xox))))))))))))))))))))) - save the last one for me a?

A dream catcher for Izzie.