If you're like me, and I think you are, you've grown tired of all these milquetoast, moderate softies competing for the nomination on both sides. There's not one among them who could hit a single gay-choice-climate-changing-pacifist in a pack of gay-choice-climate-changing-pacifists, with a shotgun.
It's time we elected a President made not of cells and tissue, but of billions of tiny Satans. Who also looks like The Penguin.
That man is Dick Cheney.
You're wondering, How could Dick possibly hope to compete this late in the game? To that I say, It starts with you and I, friend. It starts with you and I.
And Hannah Montana.
That's right comrades, all we need is a single endorsement from the most powerful "Tween" on Earth, Miley Cyrus. And as a former session drummer for her father, country LEGEND Billy Ray Cyrus, I'm confident I can make that happen. What I need from
you is campaign money, as we all know Dick's tenure at Halliburton essentially left him broke. So please, via PayPal, send your donation to
[email protected], and not only will you be supporting a noble cause, you will have made yourself elligible to win FREE HANNAH MONTANA TICKETS!
Cheney '08: America's Future Means Dick
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