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I Feel Lost,Help Me (My View/question on life And so forth)

 
 
mrhunt
 
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 03:04 am
First off,I want to say hello to everyone here.

Im a 21 Year old male and i found this site via a google search For "Life is pointless" and Alot of the posts here Seemed To Fit Right in and i must say That i can see myself sticking around for some time......

I used to Be on forums but they were more of an underground/Illegal nature that in the end ended up being more trouble than it was worth....

ANYWAYS!

I Am an athiest and Im also a Strong beleiver of Nihilism With a Poor Family History and Small bouts of depression Here and there.....The problem Is that i Beleive That some of my view points and beleifs Are Leading me Into an Extremely Negative And even suicidal Point of view on Life.....To give you a better idea of Some of my Views....

-> My Life and everyones life is pointless and without meaning
-> There is no God Or Any higher Force
-> I Dont Want To Die Necessarily...but i certainly dont care if i live
-> Everything i Do Is a Failure and I Even When i Accomplish what i want to Do That will end up in failure Too Leading to an endless circle Of Failure.
->I am extremely Hard and Negative On Myself With extremely Low self esteem


I Just feel like alot of this stuff i cant talk to people i know about.....I wont talk to a psychiatrist or even have the money for that.

I Also Do Not Care about relgion at all (as previously stated Since im an athiest)..I was raised as a christian but now view all forms of religion as just Sorts of orginized "cults"...So Religion Isnt an answer

Well.....I suppose What im saying is....I know we all get down on ourslevesw from time to Time but i honestly Feel As if i have nothing at all to live for and that Even things that Meant Something to me once Really dont mean anything at all to me anymore.....


What Do you Live For? Whats the Reason you get up everyday and Go On? Why bother? Why Bother.....
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contrex
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 04:09 am
Get help. Seriously. See a doctor. You can get out of this but you need help.
0 Replies
 
mrhunt
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 04:15 am
you saying "get help seriously" Isnt really helping man....

Im Basicly trying to explain My Beleifs and Thoughts on life in general and im asking "why"

Why Do YOU Get up everyday? Why Do you Keep Doing it? Why Bother? What are YOU living for?
0 Replies
 
Francis
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 04:27 am
At 21, you probably mistook the natural order of questions.

- First ask yourself: Who am I? Try to get some answers, know yourself.

- Then ask the usefulness of you as a person.

- Then you will probably be ready to the big questions you are asking already: what's the meaning of life?

There's no way you could know, without some experience of life...
0 Replies
 
contrex
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 05:00 am
mrhunt wrote:
Why Do YOU Get up everyday?


Short answer - because the alarm clock wakes me up, and i am hungry and want a piss and a crap.

Longer answer -

Main reasons: because I have slept enough, and I have an interesting job to go to, and I am curious to see what the day will bring.

Subsidiary reasons: If I do not do this, I will be bored, and I will not earn any money, which I need to pay for food, power, internet, phone, accommodation, holidays, books, cigarettes, presents for my girlfriend, wine, beer, shoes, clothes, a warm hat for winter, etc etc. So I will be at worst homeless, poor, dirty and lonely or at best humiliatingly dependent on others. I do not like the idea of that.

Quote:
Why Do you Keep Doing it?


Because each day is followed by another, potentially interesting, productive and remunerative one. I get Saturdays, Sundays, and holidays though, when there are more reasons for getting up!

Quote:
Why Bother?


If you need to ask this you may be clinically depressed.

Quote:
What are YOU living for?


Likewise.
0 Replies
 
Roberta
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 05:32 am
Re: I Feel Lost,Help Me (My View/question on life And so for
mrhunt wrote:

-> My Life and everyones life is pointless and without meaning
-> There is no God Or Any higher Force
-> I Dont Want To Die Necessarily...but i certainly dont care if i live
-> Everything i Do Is a Failure and I Even When i Accomplish what i want to Do That will end up in failure Too Leading to an endless circle Of Failure.
->I am extremely Hard and Negative On Myself With extremely Low self esteem



What Do you Live For? Whats the Reason you get up everyday and Go On? Why bother? Why Bother.....



First, I, too, am an atheist. I see no connection at all between God and finding a reason to live.

But then, I find no connection between living and finding a reason to live. Humans are animals. Built into the nature of every living creature is, first and foremost, survival. It's the reason the wildebeest runs from the jaws of the lion, the fly struggles to escape from the spider's web. It's innate, built into our DNA. But we humans muck things up by asking why. It makes us miserable. And it makes us human.

I don't think we need a reason. We live because we live.

I've been in that dark place you're in. I don't know that what I've said or whether anything that anyone has said or will say here will help you. I think you need to seek help from a professional. It couldn't hurt, and it just might help.

I wish you well.
0 Replies
 
Wolf ODonnell
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 07:22 am
Re: I Feel Lost,Help Me (My View/question on life And so for
mrhunt wrote:
First off,I want to say hello to everyone here.

Im a 21 Year old male and i found this site via a google search For "Life is pointless" and Alot of the posts here Seemed To Fit Right in and i must say That i can see myself sticking around for some time......


Well, what do you know? One of the able2know threads turns up at the very top of that search. Learn something new every day.

Quote:
ANYWAYS!

What Do you Live For? Whats the Reason you get up everyday and Go On? Why bother? Why Bother.....


Okay, let's see if we can throw this depression thing out the door.

Firstly, the above questions can be answered when we address your points of view.

Quote:
-> There is no God Or Any higher Force
-> My Life and everyones life is pointless and without meaning


How did you get to the second point? Because I don't see the connection between the existence of God or any higher force and life having no meaning.

Life has a point and a meaning, as long as you make sure you have one. You've got to make your life have a point and a meaning. You could dedicate your life to making other people's lives better. That would become the point to your life and the meaning to your life. Point is, you've got to find one. I really suggest you talk to people about what they do for a living, and it would seem that you've got the same idea.

I for, example, intend to try and get into a good scientific laboratory to further mankind's knowledge. If I work hard enough, I could improve quality life, by identifying yet another target for cancer drugs, or yet another cause for cancer to help people come up with effective lifestyle changes to prevent a certain disease.

You, right, could decide to be a writer. Novelists can come up with wonderful stories that entertain people and lift them up out of boredom, maybe even depression. A seriously good novel can warn of the impending disasters in the future, could inspire a new generation of scientists or inventors and on a selfish note, could grant you a kind of immortality where the memory of your deeds and life will never be forgotten as long as their are human beings to remember you.

Quote:
-> I Dont Want To Die Necessarily...but i certainly dont care if i live


You don't want to die. It's painful and at the end, nothing happens. Unless, of course there's an afterlife. But you've only got one life and you've got to get things right. You're 21, for crying out loud. There's still lots of time for you to turn things around.

Quote:
-> Everything i Do Is a Failure and I Even When i Accomplish what i want to Do That will end up in failure Too Leading to an endless circle Of Failure.


Frankly, I don't believe you. No one can be a total failure. You must have succeeded at least something in your life, otherwise you wouldn't be here to talk to us. Perhaps it would be best to make a list of all the things you perceived to be a failure, then ask yourself, "did you learn from that experience?"

Even from failure, we can get results. In failure, we learn what doesn't work and from that we are in a better position to figure out what does work.

Quote:
->I am extremely Hard and Negative On Myself With extremely Low self esteem


Well, this could explain why you think you've failed at everything you do.

Here's a good exercise.

Make a list of all the things that you think you failed at by first stating exactly what it was you were supposed to do, then state exactly what your result was. Not failure, but how you failed and how you failed to achieve exactly what you were supposed to do.

This list needn't be very long, but every event needs to be very detailed. Look at it carefully, then think "did you learn from that experience?" Will I ever need to do that again? If the answer is yes, then you haven't failed at all. You only fail, if you fail to learn from your failure.

Also, I think you should read this:
http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/sex_relationships/facts/selfesteem.htm
0 Replies
 
JPB
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 08:43 am
Ah, the BIG question... What is the meaning of life?

There was a time as a teenager when I was stuck on the same question (and it wasn't depression). I also have a deep-thinking, philosophically minded daughter who is struggling with the same thoughts. Over the years I've heard many people say there went through a period of deep introspective thought and got stuck on the same page. Few, if any, of them were people of deep faith.

That's where those with faith in an afterlife have it easier than those of us who think we get one opportunity to make a difference in the world. And to me, that is the answer to the big question. My concept in an afterlife is what we leave behind in this world, not what we bring with us to the next. I don't mean progeny, although there is certainly that. What I mean is the impact one makes on the world. There are many definitions of success and what it means to be successful. My definition of a successful (meaningful) life is one that leaves the world a better place than it was when you were born.
0 Replies
 
Noddy24
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 11:15 am
Mrhunt--

Welcome to A2K.

Finding your place in the universe requires knowing both the nature of the universe and your own nature.
0 Replies
 
curtis73
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 11:35 am
I suggest you read "conversations with god" by Neale Donald Walsh. It is a god-based idea, but it doesn't require that you believe in god to read it. Regardless of the book's point of view, it is an incredible and easy-to-read philosophy that did two things for me: 1) it removed the pointless and misguided responsibilities placed on me by my religious upbringing, and 2) it showed me that I have no responsibilities, except those which I choose, which placed the joy of life on MY shoulders. It was liberating to say the least. Its hard to describe the intellectual aspects of it, but when you remove the illogical crap that society and religion (seemingly one and the same in north america), then the joy of living rests solely with the individual. I grew up living trying to derive joy by pleasing a vengeful god. Now I live pleasing myself by pleasing the universe. Hard to describe, but the book does it well.

I don't suggest the book as a total way of living, but its a good way to scratch the surface of the complete lie that religion and society has forced down our throats.

I won't tell you to get professional help. Suicide sucks as far as the energy you're putting in the universe and it will hurt all of us as much as it hurts you, but its your choice. The question is, does your SOUL require it as part of its experience? If you're just pissed at the world and life sucks, then suicide will be a pretty terrible rift in the universe. If its what your soul chooses, that's a different thing.

You don't have to believe in god to believe that there is an afterlife, and myself being someone who pretty consistently speaks with those who have passed, I can tell you for a fact that the afterlife exists. (of course, since we all create our own reality, my fact might not be your fact) Its not heaven or hell, its just the next step. To think that we are the highest level of existence in this realm is a pretty depressing thing. Knowing that we are more than just a body and have infinite realms beyond is a pretty liberating truth. You don't have to believe what I believe, I'm just trying to give you a little glimpse of hope so you don't base your suicide on only wordly input. The world lies to you a lot Smile
0 Replies
 
mrhunt
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 02:22 pm
First off,thank you so much for everyones insight into this....this seems to be a teriffic forum Smile

As far as failures...I can Recognize That ive succeded in various areas in my life but my problem is that those Areas that i succeed In I end up twisting into failure Or End up twisting into "who gives a damn about that"?

I know that has to Do with low self esteem but its still kinda depressing......Take for example A few of my acheivements Such as 2 1st degree black belts in various styles of martial arts Or that i can build Computers I usually just say "So? So can countless other people,Therefore These Acheivements mean Nothing"

Or when i Acheive a Job I Want it never works out......At my current job i eneded up being a cook but i realized that any idiot can cook and that mosting i do dishes,Empty trash and cook Fries and therefore My job is a failure and I am a failure.

Also,I find No CONNECTION Between No Point in existence and No God...They are seperate beleifes....

I just look forward and i cant see anything For myself....I see another possible 50 to 60 Years Of Failures and Nothing And i cant bare that...After 21 years I just often Feel Like Im Over it.
0 Replies
 
mrhunt
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 02:26 pm
Also,Thank you SO VERY MUCH to the person Who posted the link to the page on self esteem....I'll be Reading that fully. Smile
0 Replies
 
Gilbey
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 02:38 pm
When most people ask the question "what is the meaning of life?", I think they are asking the wrong question. When you think about that question "what is the meaning of life?", you realize that that is not the right question to ask. When people ask that question, its like they expect some ultimate and unquestionable answer, and I don't believe there is such an answer. I think the question to ask is "what is the meaning of your life?". You have to give your own life meaning, and not expect someone or something to give your life meaning for you. you have to search for something yourself.

Your life is yours to create.
0 Replies
 
mrhunt
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 02:57 pm
No,I fully agree with that gilbey and understand it....

but what if What i create with my life doesnt matter? Because someone somewhere has done the same or better a million other times so whats the point? Whatever i do with my life,Even if i become a ******* Us Senetor or a Paramedic Helping people all day (My dream job btw) It Ultimately wont matter because Its nothing new....and ULTIMATELY im not really making a difference at all....Do u know what i mean?
0 Replies
 
Gilbey
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 03:10 pm
If you become a paramedic, and save a life, I would call that making a difference. To save a life would make so much difference to alot of people. But what you are saying is that if what you are doing is nothing new, then it doesnt make a difference. I think it depends on what you yourself are looking for in life, becoming a paramedic is a brilliant thing to do, using your life to say others, but ofcourse like you said it is nothing new. Are you not artistic in any way. Maybe expressing yourself artistically, and being creative, might be something to look into. That would obviously involve looking into yourself.
0 Replies
 
contrex
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 03:22 pm
mrhunt, you are not going to find the answer to why you should go on living on here! Especially since you don't really want to know the answer, as you keep showing.
0 Replies
 
Gilbey
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 03:24 pm
That was a really constructive point,contrex. If you have nothing good to say dont say anything at all.
0 Replies
 
mrhunt
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 04:26 pm
I realize that My viewpoints on life are different and More negative than most others....and in a way i wasnt really looking for you guys to give ME an answer.....

I was looking for You guys to Say why YOU do it everyday.And not a dumb answer like "Cause i can go to my job and i have to use the bathroom"

Do you do it for your family? Friends? Sex? What?
0 Replies
 
contrex
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 04:31 pm
Gilbey wrote:
That was a really constructive point,contrex. If you have nothing good to say dont say anything at all.


I think calling "sympathy troll" is a reasonable thing to do. Internet forum whiners irritate me, especially when they get abusive like this one does.

I say again: troll.
0 Replies
 
JPB
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Dec, 2007 05:10 pm
mrhunt wrote:
I realize that My viewpoints on life are different and More negative than most others....and in a way i wasnt really looking for you guys to give ME an answer.....

I was looking for You guys to Say why YOU do it everyday.And not a dumb answer like "Cause i can go to my job and i have to use the bathroom"

Do you do it for your family? Friends? Sex? What?


Humanity?
0 Replies
 
 

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