Mo wants to get his ears pierced.

Another "NO!" vote, here.

My son (now 21) wanted both an earring and a tattoo at various stages.

While I am not fundamentally opposed to either piercing(s) or tattoos, I asked (insisted) him to wait until he was 19 before making any permanent changes to his body, no matter how innocuous he might believe them to be.

Not on my watch.

"Why can't you be like all the other boys and get a Mohawk?"

It's true you can let them grow in (I did), but you end up with little lumps (or at least I have little lumps) where the scar tissue formed. My neighbour wasn't so fortunate; her earlobe is in two pieces.

Currency, currency, don't waste currency.

Ear-piercing is an adult characteristic. What is Mo going to do in terms of mature behavior to deserve a hole in his ear?

Adult characteristics have to be earned.

my very first reaction.. honestly...

was why not?

Safety? What safety?
Having them pulled out by some kid?
Happens ALL the time on playgrounds. At least it did when i was a kid.
No biggie.

If he doesnt like them, then they will grow back.

if he does like them, then he has earrings.


He isnt asking for a tatoo.. or a nose ring.

Earrings are alllll over society. Sheesh.. people pierce a new born babies ears as if birth wasnt traumatic enough.

Even with emotional or physical issues, lines must still be drawn. We've all seen physically or mentally handicapped children who become spoiled brats because their parents are too sidetracked by their handicap to say NO. At least, I have.

It would be different if you were all for the piercings but you're not it seems, hence the question.

The only reason I say no is because of the rough and tumble factor. Mo is a boy, a little boy who still plays rough. I could see it getting caught on a million different things.

Be firm and consistent. Kids need to know where they stand (just like puppies)

To me it is more the age not because he is a boy. Although I know some parents even have baby's ears pierced, I wouldn't want my daughters to have their ears pierced until I felt they were old enough to take care of the piercing themselves. With cleaning them everyday so they don't get infected and making sure they take care so they don't close. I figure around teenage time they will be ready if they want them.

If you don't want him to do it - and it is because of safety, I would let him know that when he is old enough to take care of them himself which would be xx age - whatever age is appropriate for him. If you don't think it is safe for him - then that should be enough reason.

Maybe you could also see if it is a passing stage - tell him for his next birthday or he has to save up enough money himself to pay for it.

My oh my how times change. Seventh grade was when most of my peers got their ears pierced in the home ec bathroom using an ice cube, a potato, a needle, a match and a short length of dental floss.

Today is my volunteer day in Mo's classroom. I'm going to check out how many kids have pierced ears.....

mountains out of molehills.... let him wait a few weeks.... if he's still bringing it up... take him to the piercers and make it clear that's the only place he's allowed to pierce.... no big deal.... he's not asking for a hash pipe or anything...

Yeah, that's what I was referring to, to. I don't think it necessarily WOULD happen, but I think there would have to be a certain reserve and careful-ness that isn't a problem for grown-ups but that I'd hesitate to impose on a kid if I could help it. I knew several kids with torn earlobes when I was a kid, part of why I was willing to wait until I was 13 to have mine pierced. (And then I couldn't play basketball until they healed -- as someone else referred to -- and it was a real hassle to keep them clean and not get infected, etc.)

so there you go... a positive life lesson.... with the privilege of having pierced ears comes the responsibility of keeping up with the TINY bit of extra maintenance it requires...a win win for all...

One more thing...

I'm sure you've figured out the temporary tattoo workaround (Sozlet loves tattoos too but accepts she won't be getting one for a loooong time, and so she does temporary tats now and then) -- there is something similar for earrings. They're little stick-on thingies that look like post earrings -- I've seen little skulls and cool stuff, not just flowers and girly stuff. Also just plain gold or silver dots.

When sozlet was most interested in getting her ears pierced I got some of those for her, and she enjoyed them but they were zero risk/ maintenance. (Stick 'em on, then pull 'em off when done. They stayed on pretty well.)

144 of 'em for $2.55!

http://www.bulktoystore.com/store/p/13435-Stick-On-Stones-Earrings-1-Gross-.html?feed=froogle

Then there's magnetic earrings:



http://www.buzzle.com/articles/body-jewelry-body-piercing-and-non-piercing-jewelry.html

Dunno what kind he wants, this was a quick find (smallest size is 6 mm):

http://www.icedoutgear.com/EARMG26.php

As a general rule, I've found it useful to start with a cheap, low-impact version of whatever the kid really wants and go from there. Call it the cardboard box rule. (You order the expensive toy and they have more fun with the box it came in...)

This is how I got my ears pierced.
3 on my left side including one close to the top of the ear, and one on my right side.

since mo seems to want to emulate his music teacher , would it be resonable to tell him that once he is as good a musician as his music teacher , HE'LL have all the money he needs to get his ears pierced and buy as many earrings as he wants ?

reminds me of art class in high school : we were asked to draw a tree . we all worked away drawing a tree , adding the branches and leaves , except one fellow who drew the trunk and added branches and leaves in a big WHIRL of colour .
when the teacher asked about INDIVIDUAL leaves , he answered that rembrandt (or some other famous painter) never painted the individual leaves . to which the art teacher replied : "when you are as famous as rembrandt i'll no longer ask you to draw all the individual leaves " . :wink:
hbg

It seems like I have the reputation of being an overly permissive parent. Nothing could be further from the truth. For every "yes" Mo gets, he gets twenty or more "no"s.

Sometimes I think "no" is just a habit and that I say it without really thinking it through. This is one of those cases.

It's nice to say "yes" once in a while.

As to responsiblity -- that's a biggie. Mo is actually very responsible. Too responsible. One of the biggest things we've been working on is getting him to understand that he is the kid and therefore NOT responsible for too much stuff. (I know, I know, it sounds basakwards to most people.)

I remember having to wait til I was 13 to have my ears pierced.
(Even though I had contacts at 12. Course, it did take me awhile to stop losing or tearing them. I had to pay for the replacements.)

Somethings are like a rite of passage....
We don't seem to have enough rites of passage today.

When I was over 18, I pierced my other three holes.
I got my tattoos after 20.

I have no kids. I don't know what I would do.
But I'm thinking waiting for something that you really want isn't the worst thing in the world. It makes you value it more.

IMO the issue should not be whether or not he's a boy....


You need to decide what the boundary is (or would be), whether your kid's a boy or a girl, and then enforce it.

You can't win, you know. Someone will always take issue with how you're raising your kid.



Sounds like Yaya.