Bush Diagnosed With Attention-To-Deficit Disorder

Bush Diagnosed With Attention-To-Deficit Disorder
The Onion - 8/19/03

WASHINGTON, DC?-Pointing to massive war-time tax cuts, physicians from the Congressional Budget Office diagnosed President Bush with attention-to-deficit disorder Tuesday.

"The president exhibits all the symptoms of ATDD: impulsiveness, restlessness, inability to focus on mounting U.S. debt likely to reach $400 billion by the year's end," Dr. Terrence Spellman said.

"Failing to address his affliction could lead to serious long-term fiscal health problems for future generations of Americans."

To treat the president's ATDD, Spellman prescribed Ritalin and an introductory course in high-school economics.