ehBeth wrote:Come on down, toy boys.
Come on down.
<giggle>
Heehee...I had a lovely one, but he became surly and snappish.....
Ahhh dlowan.
Fasting 11:03.
One of my favorites.
Marathons 56887963431657:75444568787642
Ewwwwwwww.
The angel Morbid spoke to St. Popeil :
"You gonna eat those fries, or what ?"
And it was so...
Psongs of Psalavation 101
Yea if you walk throught the McValley
I am with you.
And I have a spoon to help you gag
And if that doesn't work I have meth
And a needle
Know that if Hindus can deal
So can you
So you're cool
Ahem.
Pstarvation 18:22
And the heavenly chef did appear and he said "mommy, get with it".
Everyone will be home soon so you'd better get cooking.
And mommy said "yeah, yeah, whatever".
And she went forth unto the kitch to roll some dumplings.
Because, you know, the broth was already cooked so she was stuck
So she cooked so that everyone would buzz off
And leave her alone to finish her book
Because she's only got one frikken chapter left
Ahem
Paranoia 4:11
And the people looked but they did not post because they thought you'd lost your marbles
But you were only waiting for a Peanut Butter and Jelly or maybe a nice Steely
Or even just a Cat's Eye
4:12
I mean no harm. I loveth the glutton and all others.
4:13
I mean no offense. I'm just trying to make a point.
4:14
I'm neither gay nor thin
4:15
Not that there's anything wrong with that
Retractions 78:9
I could really be
(a) gay
(b) thin
(c) gay and thin
(c) straight
(d) a glutton
(e) a straight glutton
(f) a gay glutton
(f) a skiiny straight
(g) all of the above
(h) a liar
(i) talking to myself but enjoying the company
Say what!?
Are you calling me a craw?
Are you going to throw rocks at me or get me high?
Believe me, it matters.
You're freaking me out, dlowan, with your strange Aussie slang.
I'm going to pretend that "stone the craws" means kiss that girl with the brow hair and the overgrown toenails.
Because it's been a long day.
Because the rain won't stop.
Because cabin fever makes me see God.
And wonder why the Christians seem to love gluttons and not homosexuals when the Bible seems to dislike gluttons more than gays.
boomerang wrote:(i) talking to myself but enjoying the company
You need sound bites if this whole thing is gonna fly. Maybe get a talk radio spot or run a candidate for office. You can't get to heaven preaching to the choir ya know.
Boomer,
Are you as drunk as I am?
<just wondering>
Ummmm.
Maybe.
But I doubt it.
I did mean brown hair, not brow hair but that was just a typo.
I have eyebrows but not so much brow hair.
I have tweezers when, you know, things get messy.
Honestly, I just like to goof on religion. I spent years shopping for one that fits and never found one so I'm a bit of this and a bit of that.
I also spent too many years making a study of religion. Liberal arts colleges are full of faith and sin.
I embrace them all and reject them all. I'm just so tired of so many religions picking on gay people though and citing a couple of Bible verses to support their hatred. You can find an equal number of Bible verses to make you hate gluttons.
But it isn't "correct" to hate fat people.
I start this kind of stuff in hopes of shining a mirror on people who think they are better than others.
And I think that if I were to meet Jesus he would like me.
And I know his Daddy would like me because you can't be THAT Daddy without liking people who truly care about the world and its people.
I'll never change the world but I will sweep and mop my corner of it to the best of my ability.
It is so much nicer to toil away with a sense of humor, don't you think?
I think God likes the sound I make when I laugh.
I loved your vamp last page.
Are you sure you're not as drunk as LTX? You've been into the cooking sherry again, haven't you?
Sounds like dlowan's in line for a Bishop-prick.
Whatsa masa you? Hope to see you all tamale.
Ramen.
Boomer,
We are on the same page .
except god likes it when I make the sound of sizzling bacon.
He likes his crispy.
He also enjoys a spicy bloody mary.
In honor of these three beautiful religions coming together I'm planning to cook pasta carbonara for dinner tonight.
But I'm going to use angel hair pasta.
And I'm going to force everyone to eat it with chopsticks.
That way we can't be gluttons.
Ramen
OMmmayer
Ahem
I saw a man with fierce brow hair on the subway yesterday.
Will I be chastised for staring?
I was fascinated.
He was fascinating.
In that marvellously creepy way that men with brow hair can be.
Would brow hair be mad itchy if it was shaved off?
Would brow hair stubble look creepier than brow hair?
Would it be possible to gaze into the eyes of a man with brow hair, without being wildly distracted?
I think three spankings and a couple of bloody marys will set you straight.
It's your penance so you can pick the order to do it in: bloody marys first, then spanking; spanking first, then bloody marys; or my personal favorite - bloody mary, spanking, bloody mary.
It would be possible to stare into his eyes without distraction but only if they were reflecting a lovely plate of carbonara.
