can one love completely without complete understanding?

I dunno, define 'complete understanding'.....

"without complete understanding" refers to the state of being where one loves without question, without hint of need to know more, and love completely all the same.

the love one has for a child, for parents, for friend, and even God, where there is no definitive, rational ground for it, regardless of what is actually known by such a person.

same as un-conditional love....? The love of a pet for an owner?

bm

This beautiful, selfless type of love can get you knocked up by an (unbeknownst to you) married man or taken to the cleaners by a golddigger...

Hire an investigator, love later.

That sounds terrible, but it is my contribution to the subject.

wow..... my 'heart' (emotion is still commonly sourced in the heart....) is still a romatic, but my rationale tends to be along the lines of Sofia's post.

love is no way to treat a friend

Aside from my family, friends and my pet, I am very protective of my heart and tend to think on the same lines as Sofia as well.

Unconditional love.... evolutionary element taken to an almost spiritual level?

That's not to say it can't be the best and worst feeling in the world

DeK

What is love. Is it something learned, genetic or just a trick of the mind.

The 'in love' phenom has to do with endorphins firing off... Ah, good times... Not all biology, but some for sure...

Love, IMO, is a decision. Whatever you base love on can change--looks, wealth, personality, commonly held beliefs....

In a long term relationship, you have to decide-- I choose to love this person.

So, when the ocean of your love is experiencing significant low tide, your decision will float you til the tide comes back in...

I have that kind of faith in my God alone. Faith in man is another story altogether.
Sofia, your take on love , the low tide moments, is priceless.

Very kind, eoe.

Sofia, I have to agree with your last post as well. Love is a decision one makes, and when the sheen wears off, that decision must keep you going.

The original question reminds me of some recent arguments I have had with my wife. Right now, things in our lives are a bit stressed, so the little things that annoy us about each other are coming to the surface. However, she insists on 'understanding' why I do certain things that annoy her, and I really don't have any answers aside from habit a lot of the time (she accuses me of doing these things on purpose, which really goads me)...personally, for me, it is simply enough to comment on when something annoys me, in a diplomatic way, and leave it there. The point has been made.

Dunno....is it a man/woman thing? For me, it doesn't matter how things are on the surface, in the day to day, it doesn't diminish my commitment...spats and fighting passes, if you let it. My faith in the foundation will always remain firm.

cavfancier--

May I ask....are you retired or working out of your home? Do you spend alot of time together?

...and I have a follow up.....

I work from home sofia, she works out of the home.

cavfancier



Love is to overlook the pretty every day annoyances. I learned early on in my marriage that the fastest way to an argument is to complain or make an issue of these meaningless issues. I should add that time changes nothing. After 52 years I still know when to bite my tongue and keep my mouth shut.

Rats, you foiled my theory that you two are together too much. When I retired, and my hub was already home, I thought we were going to kill each other.

Every little insignificant thing had us at each other's throats for a few months... until we figured out what the heck was going on.

Another thought may be that something stressful or frustrating is going on with her. She is powerless to address the thing that's really bothering her, so she does the next best thing.... take it out on the one she loves the most. Typical human behavior. Hopefully, you can sit down with her, ask her if there's anything really bothering her at work, or if something has been weighing on her recently... If you can't uncover the source of her irritation, I'm afraid it's like au said.

You be da man. You find cotton for your ears, nod indiscriminately and hope she runs out of steam...

Actually, I have a radical idea. Fix yourself a nice place outside, on the porch, around the house, but distinctly away from her. Whenever she has bounced on your last nerve, go to your nice, peaceful place.

Women sometimes need to think about all their harping. Doing it in the silence, with the reverberations of her ridiculous criticisms still wafting in the air is a very good "punishment" that may work. No need to storm out or say anything untoward....

Anywho, many hopes for excellent peace and happiness.

It seems that the excess baggage of culture undermined what I was attempting to discuss. "Love" as loins rubbing together was not that to which I was referring, nor romantic feelings, but more at Agape.

"Agape (ag-ah'-pay) is the Greek word for love, one of many words for love which they had. It is however, the highest form of love, which the Greeks could conceive of, love which knows no boundaries and persists even despite ourselves. Agape is unconditional love, love which seeks only itself in return. Agape is love which gives and asks for nothing, love which persists even though everything around it is at odds. Agape is the form of love which binds souls together life after life for millennia. The capacity for such love is what sets mankind apart, and it is this which makes us divine."

http://zagreus.com/agape.htm

littleK mentioned unconditional love of a pet....... of this I admit I have seen it with all 6 of my 4-legged roommates, and it appears true to the definition of agape that these animals show such purity of spirit, of living in and for the moment and show affection without hesitation.

The lack of understanding of why one loves another demands reflection as to what causes the presence of the emotion of love, and it seems to me that whom (or which) is loved represents a trait, feature or avatar of an ideal held by the one loving.

The love one has for a family relative or friend could distill down to an ethical idea of the community, which is based upon ancient principles of survival of the group, and not in an inherent recognition of the individual's commitment as keeper and nourisher of the endless possibilities for each other.

But the world's history is replete with tales of personal sacrifice, even death as a result of love, which is beyond the bounds of personal survival.

Who amongst us would not save the life of another if they could? But who would save the life of another when it puts one's own life in danger? This is not logical, yet it exists, and if one moves to understand why a person is willing to give up their life to save another, perhaps Shopenhauer had it right.

Schopenhauer would call it merely the falling away, the peeling away of the Cartesian world of time and space in the mind of the individual revealing the ineffable, and the "sameness" of soul of others in time and space.

So, complete love from incomplete understanding reflects a conflict illogical only from the perspective of time and space, and it's very presence, and reflection of its existence draws back the curtain which shades the corporeal world revealing that which is named by many words.