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Am I feeling selfish?

 
 
Reply Sat 10 Jul, 2021 08:41 pm
I M (27)have been with my GF (F25) for almost a years time now. She's been out of work after quitting a few months back and recently moving to a new city. She has a potential job coming up in a couple days which has been wonderful to hear. I recently had a Birthday and was hoping she would have some form of gift. To my surprise, she didn't have anything nor made anything ( she tends to love doing art so I thought there might've been a drawing she has done). She deals with ADHD and uses Pot to overcome most of the effects it has one her. Currently with no job though, the only money she gets is doing chores for her mother or simply asking her mom for money to buy pot. Her mom is aware of the way she is off/on Pot so she is okay giving her money to get some. Over July 4th weekend, her friend needed some for her medical issues and they ended up combining cash to buy some. She bought $100 worth to split 50/50. She was out of Pot in a matter of 3 days, which seems quick to me but I am not a smoker to understand. Her Father was coming in out of state and she was without Pot, running low on Vapes and felt overwhelmingly stressed as the tension with her dad is not well. She ended up smoking Cigs again and found out her father wanted some Pot. She got $60 from him to go buy some and asked for another $20 to buy a new vape. She left one at my apartment that I reiterated to her before taking the cash, in hopes she would use the money possibly to buy dinner as a belated b-day surprise. We talked about what to do for dinner and her response was "It's your money get what you wanna eat", so we ended up buying a HomeChef meal while she used the $20 to buy 2 vapes at the store.

Is it wrong to feel upset/selfish about her having her mindset on other things rather not wanting to try and do something for me? She admitted on my b-day she didn't have money nor a gift, to go enjoy my day with my bestfriend who was treating me to dinner already.

I understand after 11 months that with her ADHD that she tends to have her mind set on one thing and doesn't typically think other options, especially when Pot or Nicotine is involved. It didn't surprise me when her paychecks went mostly to those options but I felt under the priority.

****last edit, We did have a talk about Pot and it was clear, if it was choice, she would choose Pot over me due to the effects it has on her to function.
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Type: Question • Score: 0 • Views: 1,939 • Replies: 3
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PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Sun 11 Jul, 2021 06:59 am
@zbuddy88,
Well there’s your answer. She chooses her drugs over you.

Break up with her. She is distracted by her need to be high all the time. There’s no room for you in her life.

There are prescription drugs that can help with ADHD. She prefers to do it her way by self medicating.
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Mame
 
  1  
Reply Sun 11 Jul, 2021 07:26 am
****last edit, We did have a talk about Pot and it was clear, if it was choice, she would choose Pot over me due to the effects it has on her to function.

Yeah, I don't think so. Why in the world are you even with this pot-head?
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EmilytheBee
 
  0  
Reply Tue 21 Sep, 2021 09:11 pm
@zbuddy88,
In my opinion I would stay with her just to get help her get through life but yet also help her get the best she needs even if it means putting her in a hostipal
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