Are Gender Reveal Parties WORSE Than the Holocaust?

Because I'm English, using irony is natural, and most people understand.

this is so funny that you need to explain this to such detail - even more funny than a gender reveal party.


Now to speak to funny - when I read the title I thought it was going to be about parties for those that actually had a gender reassignment completed. Figured one would want a party to reveal which gender they choose in the end.

Never thought it would be about an unborn baby.

WAIT! F?CK! Where's the SPOILER TAGS?! I'm only on season 1 of the HBO series. No use learning more about the Holocaust now. You have educated me on my wrongful ways Neptuneblue.

Looking back over these posts just makes me weary.

It makes me realize hubris involved in some peoples willingness to completely disregard what someone they don't agree with is saying, thinking that if they keep repeating the things that were already explained to them, they are right.

You're comparing a children's party to the holocaust.
No, I wasn't. I'm the one who said it, so I get to tell you what I meant.

Rule # 1 of conversation. The person saying something is the one who gets to tell you what they meant.

You're comparing a children's party to the holocaust.
I was using hyperbole.

What person really would think a gender reveal party was being compared to the holocaust? That is too dense for words.

You're comparing a children's party to the holocaust.
Look at the context.

Context meaning the words were accompanied by a funny video, funny comments, and more funny comments by others. No one fighting, arguing, and no, not because we are all lovers of the holocaust.

You're comparing a children's party to the holocaust.
It's a juxtaposition with humorous intent.

I guess commedians over the centuries have all be wrong.

You're comparing a children's party to the holocaust.

and on and on. The worst part is, none of the responses are every heard. It's just a record on repeat.

Oh. My favorite here, for which I was thumbed down 3 times so far (not hard to figure out by whom) was my response to:

"I spent my childhood listening to stories from my grandmother about how the Holocaust decimated her family. My family."

Me: I had a family member die in a concentration camp too.

Response: "What are you babbling about?"

Did the 3 amigos really think I was lying about that? Did I not also have a very loved grandmother that I was with for hours every day growing up, and listened to her about all sorts of things? Do not each and every one of us have a history?

Funny. I seem to remember that vividly.

However, there's only a certain group apparantly that can say they are offended. They are the only ones allowed to have life experiences.

Not that I give a **** about getting thumbed down, as I know it's the same handful of people that, quite frankly, think their **** doesn't stink. However, the fact that anyone could say "yeah, my grandmothers sister died in a concentration camp", and get a thumbs down, brings it home how insane those people will get to maintain their status quo of "I'm right"

I am glad I'm not a person who uses all their energy looking for things to be outraged about. And no, because I'm writing about it at the moment gives it nowhere near all my energy.

But, if I do get outraged about something, I guess it damn well better be the same thing the self appointed models of how the world should run are mad about.

In fact, I'm Required to be outraged at each and every thing that other person is, and to the maximum at all time. And only about those things, until I am given the ok to be enraged about something else.

I am under strict orders to be appalled, enraged, apoplectic, disgusted, and to attack anyone for the heinous crime a misplaced pronoun, a word like holocaust used in any way other than what makes you rip your clothes in despair, finding a commedian funny that said something I don't agree with, not finding a commedian funny that the Holy Ones do, and so on.

What kind of ******* world is it that you want us to live in? One where you are the commissioner of the thought police? Where we have to check in each morning to see what we need to be angry about today? Where it's ok for you to show sarcasm, edgy humour, or something others may not appreciate, but that's only for you.

You know? I once had one of the usual suspects tell me that my husband has a drug problem (he does, on and off for years), because that's the only way he can stand to be with me.

Oh wait, and also that it's my fault that I had the audacity 30 years ago to fall in love with someone "so much older" because his health is failing now. "So much older" btw, being 12 years.

I'd like to ask readers to let that sink in for a moment before continuing.

Imagine if that were said to you, about the person you've been with over 25 years, through good and bad, struggles and joys, work and play and all the rest.

Then being told by some snot nose nobody that he's a drug addict because that's the only way he can stand to be with you.


There are apparantly very strict policies and procedures decided on the this elite group as to who someone falls in love with, marries, cares for, and I guess apparantly dumps when the going gets tough. Of course, those same P&P don't apply to them.

What the **** kind of person does that? I mean seriously? Just typing that brings tears to my eyes. Not of sadness, but just because of the complete fucked upness of a person who can say something like that. One who essentially knows nothing of my life, because I figure (a), it's no one elses business. (b) It's private and (c) Honestly? Everyone has their own problems.

Yet, these are the same type of people who have no problem screaming how cruel etc. someone who doesn't agree with them is. The same people who when someone close to them has problems, would detonate if something even 1% as impactful as what was said to me were uttered. Yet, I'm the awful one.

Yet I'm the awful one for not remember if it's he or she or some other stupid ******* bullshit, because I can't even be bothered to remember. Because that's exactly how important it is not just to me, but the world at large. No One, beyond your immediate family, friends, relationships ******* cares, because we all are living our own lives.
There are people on this forum I have talked to for years, many years, that I like, and I have absolutely no idea if there're a man or woman. I just....don't....care.

Ok, now I'm set off....

Bottom line is, Who the **** do you self righteous pricks think you are?

I mean, really? What the **** makes you think you are in charge of the world, telling everyone what's appropriate, what's not, how we should say things, what or who we think is funny, who we should love, why and what the parameters of our relationships should be? Who the **** do you ******* think you are?

Yet, aren't those things you want to be able to decide for yourself?

Who the **** do you think you are throwing your god damn self righteous bullshit around as if you have the sole privilege of not liking something.

Everyone else has to walk on ******* egg shells around you about **** that you are personally offended by.

Oh, I'm (or my son or daughter) is transgender. Everyone better get on board with exactly, without fail, you must talk to me or about people like me with absolutely no deviations. That is of course until I change my mind about however I want something to be phrased. Then you better just hop to.

My grandmother, MY GRANDMOTHER! told me stories growing up about how my family, MY FAMILY! was affected by something. Well, god ******* forbid anyone else ever had bad things happen to them or their loved ones. Because it was YOUR FAMILY.

Oh god the list could go on.
Like no one else in the world ever had a family member or friend commit suicide, die in front of them, or be addicted, be mentally ill, or anything else.
No one else has ever be abused, sexually, physically emotionally or other. It's just the motherfucking "Watch Your Step Around Me Because Things Have Happened to Me and I Have Feelings" show.

What the holy **** makes you so special?

Oh, and if anyone else has the ******* nerve to say that someone they love had any of that happen, well, they're just being cruel and terrible and vile because they're talking about it.

Can I get an Amen?

Ok Boomer.

Now I have a serious question.

In the last 2 days, I asked 2 different people this question. Two intelligent people.

Let's say you were with a group of people, and the word Nazi, or 3rd Reich, or Hitler came up, and the conversation turned to that. You say something about the Holocaust. The other people say something like "We're not talking about that. That's different"

The first person actually did a coffee choke/cough and said "Are you serious?"

The other person looked at me with that squinched up "Is this a trick question?" look and then said "No, I would be thinking you're all talking about the same thing."

I mean, to me, that would be like a group discussing Charley Manson, or his Family, but if you brought up the Tate LaBianca murders, you were told that's a different subject.

Who caused the Holocaust? Hitler
Who carried out the killings? Nazis
What did they belong to: The Third Reich

So, to say the holocaust is something different? Seems like some pretty fine hair splitting.
Or at least, oh Jesus, you really think that's a stretch to put together?

If you said any of those 3 words or terms to someone, and asked them to take a minute to say all the associations that came to mind, I have no doubt holocaust would be in there.

Amen, sister (or should I say person)

Well stated - and well deserved vent!

It depends on the context.

And finally, for now, something I wanted to say to Roberta.

I get that today you couldn't use the Nazi spoon.

When you told the nazi spoon story back when (and forgive me if I don't remember all the details), it very much gave me a lesson.

My first reaction, like others was "What! A Nazi spoon?"

(Hold on, I just went an read your comments on that thread)

So even though you currently feel, as you said, disgust with the spoon, it was far from your initial reaction. That was a big smile and saying "The Nazi Spoon!"

Rereading how you mom would make choclate pudding, letting you lick the spoon, sound so loving to me. A special moment.

I thought how your mother was right in not making a big deal about it. It was a good thing to both of you. A pudding spoon.

For me, is was a lesson in not to let the bad things in life overcome you.

You mentioned wanting to writing a story about it, and said "The pudding won!"

I love that.

We live in a world where pudding can beat nazis. We really do.

It's your thought now that it bothers, even digusts you. But that didn't mean there wasn't a time when the pudding beat the Nazis.

For mentioning the Nazi spoon, I got a bunch of thumbs down, from the usual suspects. They probably didn't even know the story.

Feeling towards things change over time.
That doesn't mean prior feelings about it aren't still real.



That, in a nutshell, is why I don't find it horrible, and neither did tsar in this case, to use the words party and holocaust together.

Your mother meant no harm in letting you lick the Nazi spoon. I am sure that some people would want to call Child Protective Services over that today.
Up until some chronic kvetch got their chonies in a wad, others didn't find it evil either.

Aha! Now, I know what we are talking about.

2 days ago I was driving by El Arroyo.

They change their sign out front every day. Couldn't get a picture of it in time.

Just found it on Google images.

Sorry, have a burning desire to say one other thing.

Gonna be full of expletives.

I am also so god damned, mother ******* sick and tired of all this bullshit of "you're mean, cruel, vile, awful, terrible etc etc" that is not just directed at me, but at any number of people. It's done simply because people are expressing their opinions, which differ from what the self appointed masters and experts of all things like.

******* grow up.
Not everyone thinks like you. Get over it.
Because they don't think like you doesn't make you any of the above things.

In fact, those names are almost always thrown out over things taken out of context, exagerrated, or simply over nothing. It's just done to fan the flames.

I am a good and kind person.
I live my life causing harm to no one.
If I do accidently harm someone, I make it right.
I do things that help others and am appreciated.
I'm loved.
I'm liked.
I'm sought out by others.
I respect the wisdom of others experience, and have others respect the wisdom I have.
I am not a one dimensional entity on your computer screen.
I am a real, well rounded, happy person.
I've worked very hard all my life, and am enjoying the rewards, which take many forms.
I am none of the names that I get called by some people here. The people who call others names like they call me just want to fight.

I am a good and kind person.

So is tsar, linkat, roger (well....I guess ) Roberta, and most of the people who have posted on this thread.

They are all good and kind people.

And that, like the pudding spoon, wins.

Well, ain't you just the cat's meow.

Full of yourself and expletives. Gee, what a ******* surprise. And ranting to boot. Again, you want to fight. I voiced my opinion, which you positively will not let go, and choose to rant some more.

You're not making this right. You're wanting to make YOU right.

So go ahead. Keep responding with nothing but anger and bullshit. You're good at it, much better than me. You win. Hope you like what that means.

I've been a member of this forum since 2002. This may be the third time that I've gotten myself involved in a controversial issue. I avoid them like the plague. Mostly it's because I don't like to argue. We are all voicing our OPINIONS. Opinions aren't right or wrong. They're just what you think or I think about an issue. Nothing is resolved. Nothing really comes to an end. And all that results (it seems to me) is bad feelings.

I'm not suggesting that the discussion in this thread should end. You guys do what you wanna do and say what you wanna say. But this kid (moi) is outta here.

It's always sad when interesting people get caught up in hurt feelings. My paternal grandmother was a horror show, when my cousin Jim and I (as toddlers) were dragged to her house (and we both dug our heels in and screamed noooooooooo) we were horrified. She was everything that was awful in a human being. She lived in a row house in Baltimore directly across from Carroll Park (former estate of Charles Carroll, signer of the Declaration of Independence) it was a very modest home..Jimmy and I are the only people alive who still remember that monster...I hate root beer, because that's all she drank, frigging Frosty rootbeer bottles all over the floor......Jimmy still has nightmares about being forced to kiss her. I was never forced to do that.

The point of all this is to say that we all have 'nightmares' we try to forget. Don't tell me I should try to like root beer, don't tell little Jim he should have been happy to kiss that malevolent woman-blob, and lets all give each other a break....we all have sore points, we have never walked in each others shoes, I loathed Winnie (grandmother) but Jimmy and I knew the real horror story....please for Christ's sake, can we all just relax and stop vilifying the other folks we have all known for so long.

I yield the remainder of my time.

Thank you for the example of what Chai is speaking to.

Defending a wrong position is wrong.

But this thread was not supposed to be about a controversial issue. Unless of course you consider a gender reveal party controversial - many people turned into one.

It was supposed to be a clever title to catch your eye (which it must have) because of the ridiculousness/over exaggerating how bad these parties are. I get it. Maybe I don't agree with using the Holocaust in this way, but I get it and it is pretty obvious the intention was to offend anyone by reading the initial post.

Many others turned this into a controversy where there was none meant.

Add to this some individuals that tend to carry over their disagreements on another subject - and boom these individuals use this as another way to "get back" at a poster they disagreed elsewhere.

Add to that someone under a large amount of stress dealing with a really trying situation (of which others have responded in a very cruel and heartless way) and boom - something that was supposed to be a fun and entertaining post - becomes a hot bed of controversy.

Yes - lets be kind to each - no reason to be cruel (example noted above) because someone was long ago overdue for a well needed vent (don't we all at times) - and consider as Chai noted that there are real people behind these posts - and though you do not agree - not reason to wish others ill will (I toned this down it was much more cruelly written).

As I have told my children since they were old enough to understand - you do not have to be friends with everyone, but you need to be kind to everyone.

A position is an opinion - unless you can prove this by fact. In either case I am not defending any position. What I was doing was pointing out the example of being cruel and unkind.....



This is what I am referring to - this is not kind. A person sometimes needs to vent. She is letting out steam that is long due. I am not 100% sure if or what you have directly said and I honestly due not care - However, I personally have read some very cruel things that some others have written (some of which is noted in this vent) - that completely cross the line and this is what I read into as I read the vent. Letting steam off.

Typically when I see something growing in this unkind way - I note that in the post and also make it clear I am not going down this path and will no longer respond.

Life is short - and there are so many good things in it. Sometimes you need to just let it go and realize also that sometimes someone else may have more stuff going on and a kind word or two will do so much more than coming back with an insult (ie cat's meow).

One of my favorite stories is of a friend and first grade teacher - she told the story to her class of how she was in line at a store and a woman in front of her was being all mean and pushy and sort of forcing her way in front of other people - instead of (like what most of us would do) tell her not to force her way in front of you, be mean to the check out clerk - this friend told the woman .."I'm sorry you are having a bad day." The woman then looked at her shocked..."yeah you are right I am having a bad day...thank you." and then she realized how she was acting and that one act of kindness changed how she then dealt with my friend and the check out woman.

So imagine instead of saying you "Well ain't you the cat's meow" you recognized there is probably all of stuff going on here I do not realize - Chai must be having a really bad time - maybe instead just saying - I'm sorry Chai that you felt the need to vent. Maybe we all should just try to be a bit kinder. I do not agree with what you wrote and I never will but I only wish you the best and hope you feel better.

Now you still get your point across but you do so with respect and kindness.

And you can do this even when it seems the person is "ranting" or seems in your opinion in the wrong.

But then again maybe I am the cat's meow.

It's ironic that you've said you've pointed out what others have written that were cruel, but quoted only me. I did explain my position and asked for the attacks against me to stop. Actually Chai choose to ramp up her "vent."

Again, I find no humor in comparing gender reveal parties to the Holocaust. I've asked for an explanation of how this is meant to be funny and was met with more "venting" and attacks implying I have no sense of humor.

I called out a bad post that was not meant to be funny, ironic or even thought provoking.