The Best Compliment?

A girl laughed at my joke. Okay so it wasn't a compliment, but it was pretty close.

jeez. omigod.

how many years ago was that?

People have said I was smart, funny, beautiful and all that fun stuff, but nothing really stands out.

I'll have to think on this one.

Well, that sounds like plenty already...

Yeah, it feels good to be complimented and I rather like it a lot :-D I think we all do.

You are right.

Thats why I was asking this question. On one hand its shallow and easy.

But on the other hand I was trying to get at some underlying human psychology/philosophy.

What is the types of compliments that stays with us for decades? And why do these particular compliments stay with us longer?

For me, the ones that stay with me forever seem to be from kindergarten and first grade.

I still feel terrible when I remember my darn kindergarten teacher tell me my art project was terrible, and I should look at Cindy's (red hair girl across the aisle) for an example of a project that was better than mine. Darn both of them!

On the other hand, I still remember my first grade teacher repeatedly complimenting me on my math and my reading! This (the good & bad) has stayed with me for decades.

Why do certain compliments stay with us longer than others?

The ones that really stick with me are when I'm complimented on things that I've accomplished, such as home improvements, my garden, craft projects, etc...
I think it's because it makes me feel proud of what I've done. I take pride in most everything I do and when people compliment these things, I feel good about myself.
I also like it when a boss tells me I'm doing a good job because it makes me feel valuable.
Does that all make sense? It's kind of hard to explain.

Not a deliberate compliment (which makes it all the better) but very complimentary.

I write. I walked into the livingroom where someone was reading a comedy piece I had written and left on the couch. They were reading it and half falling off the couch from laughter.

The only time I've ever been able to guage the effectiveness of something I had written without having to trust other people to be honest rather than complimentary.

It would be something about my intellect, or my personality. Screw looks, I have no attachment to the public's opinion as far as that goes. But when someone tells me that I am a good listener, or that I have intelligence, it sticks with me.

I feel the same way.

I don't know if I can come up with a "best" but I can come up with a few things people have said or done that were complementary that probably changed my life:

In high school I had an eccentric, hard to please teacher that everyone was terrified of. At the end of the semester, in a very crowded hallway, he yelled down to me "Excellent paper! I actually read it!" (Lesson learned: some peple respect my ideas, don't be afraid to toss them out there for deliberation.)

In college, despite my freshman status, I was invited to take a seminar along with a dozen other hand picked students. (Lesson learned: some people respect the way I think, it's okay to think out loud.)

In photography school I had an incredibly demanding and hyper-critial teacher. The class met one day a week for four hours. Each class started with us hanging our weekly assignment on the board to be picked apart (figuratively) and torn apart (literally) followed by several hours worth of lecture regarding our idiocy.

One week, at the end of the shredding, I still had one photo on the board. The teacher plucked it off, I waited for the ripping. Instead, he spent the next hour explaining to the class why the photo, a portrait, was so very, very good. (Lesson learned: I became a portrait photographer.)

I'm still learning the lesson of the final one; it's pretty tricky. I'm not even quite sure that it is a complement. I'll hold off describing it until I've had a chance to really think it over.....

Well you know, people laughed at my jokes recently too... yeah. Trust me. :wink:

the one that sticks in my mind came about because of something silly but when i think about it it was the best compliment i ever got i think, i started juggling oranges while bored at a friends house once and juggled 3 then 4 and some behind my back (i got bored easily as a kid and learned all kinds of daft stuff) anyway my friends gf asked "how come you are dead good at everything you do?" which was a pretty good compliment

When I was in art school in Chicago, 1975-1977, Diane von Furstenberg introduced her wrap dresses and did a trunk show at Marshall Field's in Water Tower Place. A group of us fashion design and illustration students went and met her and she looked at me and said that I was beautiful.

I was joking around at a workplace and I made a coworker pee her pants laughing. I was very pleased with myself! I still haven't forgotten that, it was the first thing that came to mind.

Mr S says I've got very warm thighs

Someone once told me he loved my voice and the sound of my name. I've never forgotten that.

An experienced lady once said to me-

Goodness gracious spendi!!

What a bunch of teases! around here--

bragging about their thighs, voice, sound of their name....

but hide all of it from us! Why dost thou tease?