2
   

STOPPING BY OUR HOME ON AN ORDINARY EVENING

 
 
Reply Fri 29 Apr, 2005 10:59 pm
I've gotta stop doing this!
STOPPING BY OUR HOME ON AN ORDINARY EVENING

At night when the lights go out in our house,
Begins the putrid picnic for each cockroach, rat, and mouse
Behind every grisly glob of gangrenous head cheese,
'Twixt tossed Twinkie Wrappers flapping in the humid breeze,
Beneath the dross and flotsam where larvae twitch and jerk.
Vulgar, vile, voracious, vicious vermin hide and lurk.

Skritch, scratch, grind, scrape, skitter, scatter, scrunch,
The cockroach army is marching off to lunch.
O'er ancient linoleum they race, roll, rock, and romp.
And no matter how many crispy critters that I stomp -

Eat, bite, gulp, snort, gobble, nibble, chew,
Soon they will be feasting on some mortified stew,
Biting bits of gruesome grits and botulous bologna,
Munching many mangled orts of morbid macaroni.

Splutter, splatter, slop, slough, sully, bubble, splash,
Rodents are a' frolicking in mutilated mash.
From every crack and cranny that you might dare to mention,
Beasties are converging for a carrion convention.

Eat, bite, gulp, chew, gobble, nibble, snort,
Masticating moldy meat is mighty fine sport.
Orange peels and greasy gizzards, coffee grinds and jelly,
Putrefactive portions of a smorgasbord so smelly.

Hiss, swish, sizzle, siss, effervesce, whiz,
Effluent fermenting with a flatulent fizz.
Millipedes and maggots all attend the bloat buffet,
Savoring the flavor of its fetid fish bouquet.

Eat, bite, drink, slurp, slobber, dribble, chew.
Bacchanalian bugs imbibe the chunky (yuk!) brew.
Mummified and motley pizzas, noodles all atrocious,
Omnivorous friends enjoy at Hotel Halitosis.

Often times I wonder in the middle of the night:
Will this pigsty always be a' festering with fright,
A restaurant for rodents with an eating aberration,
A house of wormy worship for the cockroach congregation?
For all these garbage garnishments I ain't gonna grieve,
'Cuz soon as I can raise the dough, well, I'm a'gonna leave.
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Type: Discussion • Score: 2 • Views: 1,565 • Replies: 10
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makz 18
 
  1  
Reply Sat 30 Apr, 2005 04:39 am
surgery required
The person who wrote that has issues
Quick man, get the lube and some tissues
There's an iron rod jammed up his ass
What's the lesson we learned today class?

An iron pole
shan't play a role
in poetic inspiration

(dude, get a life)
0 Replies
 
Bekaboo
 
  1  
Reply Sat 30 Apr, 2005 11:42 am
Oh yuck i stopped reading properly at about the third verse because my skin was crawling - yuck!! Your stuff always makes me laugh. If i'd have been expecting that i think i would have liked it Razz - i'll come back and read later after i've prepared myself!! Razz
0 Replies
 
99white99
 
  1  
Reply Sat 30 Apr, 2005 12:38 pm
Neologist in the short time that I have been here your poetry has yet to cease to amaze me. If you wrote this without the help of a thesaurus you have an amazing vocabulary. Regardless of if the thesaurus aided you in writing this piece the rhyme, meter and repeating first letters of certain words was wonderful. Your writing reminds me of a Doctor Seuss for teenagers or something. I don't mean that bad I mean it seems you can write a poem over anything with good rhyme, meter, and good, though not expected, words.

makz18 your sickening, shallow, and if all of your posts are like that one your input is not worth the bandwidth you have wasted.
0 Replies
 
neologist
 
  1  
Reply Sat 30 Apr, 2005 04:26 pm
I've got a 12 year old's brain in a God-knows-how-old body.
Don't worry, makz 18, I'm happy to have hogged you out.

EDITED BY MODERATOR TO ELIMINATE PROBLEMATIC IMAGE LINK
0 Replies
 
Bekaboo
 
  1  
Reply Sat 30 Apr, 2005 04:31 pm
*points and giggles*

If i asked God how old would he say you are?
0 Replies
 
neologist
 
  1  
Reply Sat 30 Apr, 2005 04:37 pm
I remember the day Hitler committed suicide. The whole neighborhood was outside with firecrackers and new year's eve noisemakers. We children would strut around making the 'Heil Hitler' sign whilst holding two fingers of the other hand against the upper lip to imitate his mustache. It wasn't until years later that I realized how totally evil he was and why the world had reason to rejoice.
0 Replies
 
makz 18
 
  1  
Reply Sun 1 May, 2005 01:38 am
bekaboo, take my name out of your tag, I hate people using my name in analogies, unless they involve food

e.g.

I was at a barbecue with some friends and one of them laoded up his plate with bacon. He said "Bacon to the Max." so I distracted him and took his bacon.
0 Replies
 
Bekaboo
 
  1  
Reply Sun 1 May, 2005 07:18 am
I'm not changing a signature I've used for 8 years to "maximum" just because it happens to sound like your name!!

@ neologist: wow
0 Replies
 
neologist
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 May, 2005 08:06 am
Thanks. I finally found something that even my 13 year old grandson thinks is gross. Of course, he printed it and brought it to school.
0 Replies
 
neologist
 
  1  
Reply Sun 6 Apr, 2014 01:24 pm
@neologist,
neologist wrote:

I've gotta stop doing this!
STOPPING BY OUR HOME ON AN ORDINARY EVENING

At night when the lights go out in our house,
Begins the putrid picnic for each cockroach, rat, and mouse
Behind every grisly glob of gangrenous head cheese,
'Twixt tossed Twinkie Wrappers flapping in the humid breeze,
Beneath the dross and flotsam where larvae twitch and jerk.
Vulgar, vile, voracious, vicious vermin hide and lurk.

Skritch, scratch, grind, scrape, skitter, scatter, scrunch,
The cockroach army is marching off to lunch.
O'er ancient linoleum they race, roll, rock, and romp.
And no matter how many crispy critters that I stomp -

Eat, bite, gulp, snort, gobble, nibble, chew,
Soon they will be feasting on some mortified stew,
Biting bits of gruesome grits and botulous bologna,
Munching many mangled orts of morbid macaroni.

Splutter, splatter, slop, slough, sully, bubble, splash,
Rodents are a' frolicking in mutilated mash.
From every crack and cranny that you might dare to mention,
Beasties are converging for a carrion convention.

Eat, bite, gulp, chew, gobble, nibble, snort,
Masticating moldy meat is mighty fine sport.
Orange peels and greasy gizzards, coffee grinds and jelly,
Putrefactive portions of a smorgasbord so smelly.

Hiss, swish, sizzle, siss, effervesce, whiz,
Effluent fermenting with a flatulent fizz.
Millipedes and maggots all attend the bloat buffet,
Savoring the flavor of its fetid fish bouquet.

Eat, bite, drink, slurp, slobber, dribble, chew.
Bacchanalian bugs imbibe the chunky (yuk!) brew.
Mummified and motley pizzas, noodles all atrocious,
Omnivorous friends enjoy at Hotel Halitosis.

Often times I wonder in the middle of the night:
Will this pigsty always be a' festering with fright,
A restaurant for rodents with an eating aberration,
A house of wormy worship for the cockroach congregation?
For all these garbage garnishments I ain't gonna grieve,
'Cuz soon as I can raise the dough, well, I'm a'gonna leave.
0 Replies
 
 

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