Duelling doggerel!

McTag and Steve his friend
As usual have me bested
This Bank Holiday Weekend
I left the duel and rested
Don't think this is a lay
Or attempt at doggerel vile
'Tis just a note to say
I've been busy for a while

BUT.....I shall be back.

Go, Dog, go Dog, go go go!
I love a Dog, I love her so
Rock 'n' roll is the thing for me
Music with verve and velocity
Honour your partner, doesy-doe
Have you seen Five Guys Named Moe?

No

Let green and sleeping Ogres lie
Awake not their beery slumber
Into the heavens sayle I high
E'en the Armour doth encumber
Aboard the Dragon's scaly back
I'm settled now, a mite disturbed
A flap, a whooosh! And now a flack -
I'm in the Ayre, a bit perturbed
Oh! But such a view as now I have
Here among the cummuli
The Ayre is thynne, the Dragon brave
To bear this weighte across the Skye
My armour - Oh! 'tis some fine weight
My trustie Mounte it maketh puff
I'll not it stoke, or roasted Fate
Will be mine own if make it huff!
His grate, grate wings, they beat and flappe
O'er mountain, valley, hill and dale
Beneath its wings, the wind doth slappe
As doth the Ocean 'gainst the Sayle
Hark! There be a Cave ahead
The Dragon's lair, I'll yet warrant
And on the Rock, chayned, near-dead….

Two Ogres greene and errant?

What be this now? A twist? A con?
A turn-up for Le Livre D'Amour?
Ogres dressed in pinke Chiffon
As per a spreade for Glamour?
Shackled both, greene and beery
Coarse the weeping as maides-to-bedde
In Cartland Frockes, eyes all-bleary
Is the errant Knighte like wise fledde?
Aye, it be so - the cries distressed
Of both these Ogres greeney
Left the Knight so unimpressed
He joyned a Nudeling Colonie
'Twas his Suit I found by chance
While stepping out to Play
Oh, thought I, may happenstance
I'll use this thinge one day
And so be leery, ye goode folke,
Of Maides who love Ironie
They'll break an Egge and tosse the Yolke
Upon the Classic Storie!

Mediaeval tayles of dragons and such
Is a subject I don't ponder too much
In the workaday world, little time to ponder
What phantastickal things may lie out yonder
But there they lie, in a dim recess
Of a fertile mind in a Cartland dress
And I'm knocked out; such erudition!
That damsel's truly on a mission
Earth's surly bonds do break asunder
Mortals can only stand and wonder

Tip-toe tip-toe tip-toe
Slipping through the window
Think anyone would notice
My peaking through the lattice?

Send me reeling through the air
If you really don't care
But I was disconnected a bit
Really, I was not lurking at lit

Rent was due and I had no cash
Then was gone, my secret stash
So, internet went along with it all
Until I got my life back on the ball

I see little has truly changed here
But it surely will take me a year
To ever get back into the groove
But I will; this I must prove

Glad to see the familiar faces
Names and all the friendly places
Still coming here to play and write
Way past bedtime each night

Glad to be back……………

How's about we try a poem?
Just so we can show 'em
You have never enough
Of this kind of stuff
But with seeds, you gotta sow 'em

McTag:

Under your direction
We, section by section
I do surely believe
Could perhaps weave
A long verse narrative
A Play, an Epic votive
An offering to the Gods
Though we be but Cods

But....I've a story to finish first.

We'll say...um, three weeks time?

You've summat to think about now!

You write stories?
O tempora, O mores!
That is most interesting and good
And I'd like to know more if I could
But meanwhile, needs must as they say
I can picture you in your garret, scribbling away

'Twas a dark, drear and stormy night,
The moon quite totally obscured.
'Twas enough to give one quite a fright
That one might get waylaid and lured
Into dungeons dark and truly horrid
Or hellish depths both hot and torrid
Where evil glints gave the only light.

But, on now with our turgid tale
Of distressed maids and gallant knights
Who lift the gross and evil veil
To bare the most god-awful sights
Repulsive to our fair culture.
Let's speak of vivisepulture.

[feel free to pick up the thread, McTag or anyone else]

Vivisepulture you dream of tonight
My sweet maiden, hold your fright
For I and my noble donkey will ride
To stand bravely at your soft side

Warding off the powerful evil warriors
Breaking through their mighty barriers
If indeed we must die during the night
We will die together before dawn's light

Fear not the truth of walls so near
To your face next to your ear
For you will wake from this nightmare
But escaping you will flee to nowhere

Put your mortal body into a box
Listen to the loudly ticking clocks
Until you breathe no more into the dark
Screaming silently as a meadow lark

Nice one, H, you're on the ball
It's bedtime here, so goodnight all.

Well, well...McTag ol' chap
Fer quite a long spell now
Ye have been out fer a nap
Fergot to set the alarm sumhow?

Maybe ye just ferget about us
'r now ya claim t' be s'busy
Regardless, catch the next bus
Join the party, make yerself dizzy

oh...boy....well...at least I may have made ya grin a little

Play
McTag:

I have a BIG idea. Can I email you?

Re: Play


E-mails, PM's, bring 'em on
If they don't find me here, I'm gone

I'm going downtown to get a book
In the library's where I'll look
But first, I think I've got to shave
I'm looking one-foot-in-the-grave

It's very warm here, a real heatwave
But that's no reason for a gentleman not to get
A shave.

Re: Play


A gentleman?
And shaving too?
This must be something fairly new
It really is a shock...
You're not a wild eyed hairy Jock?

Never bearded, was he, Steve?
That I couldn't quite believe -
Nor moustachio'd, McTag
Nor had a ponytail to wag,
So what's the fuss if he must shave?
He doesn't have to be so brave!

Two years past I gave up shaving
(while maintaining daily laving).
Now I'm such a jolly sight:
Damn! Why're these whiskers snowy white?

Smooth as a baby's butt
Shaved and groomed clean
Splashed with suede and must
Shining almost a bald sheen

Has the silver migrated?
Having moved down under
Or Has it taken over entirely
Sending cares asunder?

To shave or not to shave
That is the question today
But morning arrives whether
We be ready or nay

Hey if anyone thought I was getting a mail
Well I did too, but it did not come
I suppose it could well be system-fail
So don't go counting your chickens, chum
Just drum your fingers, drum drum drum