eoe - how horrible.
I read a fascinating book called 'One Summer In Between' in my teens
It opened my eyes to prejudice and the hidden kind you describe.
The (about her own experiences) book is about a black/coloured (don't know the PC description for the US - here people describe themselves as black so hope I'm not being offensive?) girl from the south, in the days of segregation, who is encouraged by her tutor at Uni to work in the north for the summer to open her eyes and deal with
her prejudices - he's concerned that she's becoming very set in her views.
I had no
idea of the racism, the segregation in buses etc, having been brought up in a family who'd travelled, lived abroad and didn't give a damn about race colour or creed.
The girl is helped off the bus on arriving in NY by the white conductor, who holds her elbow to steady her - she's left utterly speechless as this, it couldn't have happened in the south - the book then charts her dealing with her own and the hidden preconceptions and hidden prejudice of the north - a real eye opener for all (and me) - a really good book. Sorry I can't remember the author, it was some time ago but you can see the impression it made that I still remember the title.
just googled it and they have it on Amazon - author Melissa Mather.
I just might invest in a copy and reread to see if it is as good as I remember.