Thu 17 Aug, 2017 10:05 am
From the Department of Important Breaking News (New England Bureau)
A 1,200 pound bull escaped three days ago and is now on the loose in Ayer, Massachusetts. Authorities say not to approach the bull. And this being 2017, the bull now has his own Twitter account
Citizens! What would a bull tweet?
"DOW down 274 today? Are you kidding me? Is this still America? Well, wherever there's an idiot selling, there's gonna be someone buying and getting a steal. And I guess it might as well be me. Give me 10,000 shares of that, John!"
(If his only Twitter follower were his stock broker.)
"No, I will not endorse Trump Steaks!"