Now - The Write Your Own Comedy Routine Thread

Come one come all. Who's the next Sienfeld or Bill Cosby? I see we have our first pigeon. Looks like edgarblythe. Step up to the mike, edgar.

" Hello. Hello. I just flew in from Austin ...
Boy are my jokes tired. I entertained the passengers the whole way. Well, not the whole way. This woman with a baby started hollering all my punch lines. I began telling the set-up lines in Yiddish and the punch lines in Aramaic. The crowd entertained itself punching and kicking me for a terrorist all the way to the airport. I tell ya, it ain'y easy being a comedian in 2004. Anybody else here from Texas? Oh, not admitting it. Texas is one of those states that went from voting yellow dog Democrat to solidly Republican. I no longer count how many of our Republicans used to be Democrats. I guess the yellow still applies in some ways, huh? Our Governor Perry's a peach. He decided last month all the new highways to be built between the cities must be toll roads. Wanta bet his re-election chances? Hint: He will be the white male Republican; a shoe-in no matter what. He could push legislation calling on the president to invade France, Cuba and Vatican City and still win by a landslide. Hey, ya know what? We've got Willie Nelson. You're not impressed? Well, who've you got, people that read? I kid Willie. He's a prolific songwriter. Patsy Cline's great hit, CRAZY, was penned by Willie. He's some business man. Willie sold the big hit THE NIGHT LIFE for about a hundred dollars. Ever hear of Cut 'n' Shoot, Texas? That's where my next gig is. Ya'll have a good night, ya hear? "