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Appeal Letter _ Need your feedback

 
 
Reply Fri 20 Feb, 2015 05:17 am
Dear Committee Members

I hope this letter finds you in good health

I am writing this appeal letter as a request to review your decision to withdraw from the faculty of engineering just because I failed second time in a compulsory course. I’m not writing you to give excuses but merely to shed some light on the situation that I have been throughout the last year.

Studying abroad is a difficult thing to say the least, but once you cross the barriers of your mental state. I never took the idea of being homesick very seriously. Our family has moved around the world together from place to place, and it is rare that one goes so far out of his route to continue his education. It is clear that I was a very good student all previous prior fall 2014 (look at Fall/Winter 2013 grades).

I admit, I had a very difficult time last year, and my grades suffered as a result. I don't mean to make excuses for my poor academic performance, but I would like to explain the circumstances. I was performing under stressful and uncomfortable circumstances some in which were life altering. My older son moved to another country for work during that year, and I fell into a deep depression.

I dropped two courses and get nothing from others during Fall 2014. Really I dropped that other courses as well but it seems that I did not see that these are not dropped. In winter, I repeat two courses and I got a C+ in one and failed in the other one (which is the biggest trouble though). I am not aware that if I fail twice I will be dismissed from the faculty otherwise how did I register normally for 4 courses in Winter 2015 and no probation letter had been received.

Following the bad grades time I’ve received on no fault but my own, I sought for the things that had to changed so I can move forward positively and receive your honorable degree. I have attended sessions with a student councilor at the university to tackle my problems. I continued to work on myself following the meets; I made the simple things work best for me in the beginning as to build strong roots. I adopted a to-do-list, I wrote down the problems and tackled them head on. For example, the message that is always addressed about having to make one step for a journey of a thousand miles never made more sense than it has now. I want to extend my apologies for not showing you how important it is to be here.

I know I’ve had a couple of setbacks, and I apologize to you the committee for feeling as if I wasted your time for my poor academic performances. I understand you’re trying to run an institution of higher learning, and you’re trying to set everything to a fair standard for everyone. Lately, due to the decision, I sat down with myself to re-evaluated my mistakes and the change I’m GOING to make moving forward.

• I have attended sessions with a student councilor at the university to tackle my problems
• I will seek the aid of tutors if need be for continual improvements
• Once I receive my schedule, I will construct a study timetable for homework assignments and preparations for exams. That was also a problem I was facing early on.
• I also want to start visiting my professors during office hours in order to keep up with the work and get his insight

I will continue to improve my grades for the semester and the following to come and would be like the opportunity to meet and speak about this in person and appeal. I just ask that I can be considered for a semester to show you that I have learned from my mistakes and this fault would not continue on because I have addressed it and is following a plan to eliminate it completely. I would ask kindly for a chance not for the appeal to waiver just a chance to prove to you and myself that these changes are here to stay. I want to prove to the committee, the University, my family and mostly to myself that I have been bent, but not broken.


Thank you for the time you took to read this

I hope to hear from you

Cordially Yours,
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AliQassim
 
  1  
Reply Fri 20 Feb, 2015 06:10 am
@AliQassim,
I need your feedback on what are the weak point and what should I remove/update
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jespah
 
  1  
Reply Fri 20 Feb, 2015 07:50 am
@AliQassim,
AliQassim wrote:

Dear Committee Members

I hope this letter finds you in good health

I am writing this appeal letter as a request to review your decision to withdraw from the faculty of engineering just because I failed second time in a compulsory course a second time. I’m not writing you to give excuses but merely to shed some light on the situation that I have been throughout the last year.

Studying abroad is a difficult thing to say the least, but once you cross the barriers of your mental state(<-- this conclusion doesn't make any sense in English). I never took the idea of being homesick very seriously. Our family has moved around the world together from place to place, and i It is rare that one goes so far out of his route to continue his education. It is clear that I was a very good student for all semesters all previous prior to fall 2014 (please look at my Fall/Winter 2013 grades).

I admit, I had a very difficult time last year, and my grades suffered as a result. I don't mean to make excuses for my poor academic performance, but I would like to explain the circumstances. I was performing under stressful and uncomfortable circumstances some in which were life altering. My older son moved to another country for work during that year, and I fell into a deep depression.

I dropped two courses and get nothing from others during Fall 2014. Really I dropped that other courses as well but it seems that I did not see that these are not dropped. In winter, I repeat two courses and I got a C+ in one and failed in the other one (which is the biggest trouble though). I am not aware that if I fail twice I will be dismissed from the faculty otherwise how did I register normally for 4 courses in Winter 2015 and no probation letter had been received.

Following the bad grades time I’ve received on no fault but my own, I sought for the things that had to changed so I can move forward positively and receive your honorable degree. I have attended sessions with a student councilor at the university to tackle my problems. I continued to work on myself following the meets; I made the simple things work best for me in the beginning as to build strong roots. I adopted a to-do-list, I wrote down the problems and tackled them head on. For example, the message that is always addressed about having to make one step for a journey of a thousand miles never made more sense than it has now. I want to extend my apologies for not showing you how important it is to be here.

I know I’ve had a couple of setbacks, and I apologize to you the committee for feeling as if I wasted your time for my poor academic performances. I understand you’re trying to run an institution of higher learning, and you’re trying to set everything to a fair standard for everyone. Lately, due to the decision, I sat down with myself to re-evaluated my mistakes and the change I’m GOING to make moving forward.

• I have attended sessions with a student councilor at the university to tackle my problems
• I will seek the aid of tutors if need be for continual improvements
• Once I receive my schedule, I will construct a study timetable for homework assignments and preparations for exams. That was also a problem I was facing early on.
• I also want to start visiting my professors during office hours in order to keep up with the work and get his insight

I will continue to improve my grades for the semester and the following to come and would be like the opportunity to meet and speak about this in person and appeal. I just ask that I can be considered for a semester to show you that I have learned from my mistakes and this fault would not continue on because I have addressed it and is following a plan to eliminate it completely. I would ask kindly for a chance not for the appeal to waiver just a chance to prove to you and myself that these changes are here to stay. I want to prove to the committee, the University, my family and mostly to myself that I have been bent, but not broken.


Thank you for the time you took to read this

I hope to hear from you

Cordially Yours,


There's more but I have my own schoolwork to do. Do you see what I'm doing here? I am getting rid of the fawning and replacing it with regular politeness. Saying please and thank you is one thing; asking about the committee members' health is a different matter entirely. I am also jettisoning a lot of unnecessary verbiage and making your letter more idiomatically correct in English. Plus you come off as extremely defensive. Think about how you'd feel if you got a letter like this. I think you'd find the writer was really defensive about their behaviors.

You have a ways to go before this is in good shape to be sent to the committee.
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