There is an old saying, "the best revenge is to live a good life". Is this forgiveness?
No, it's revenge.
The hardest part, for me, of forgiveness is removing the personalness of whatever harm was done to me. I have to see the acts or words as something belonging, not to me, but to the perpetrator. Once that is done, even if they have no knowledge of the removal, their poison is removed from me.
That's why Dlowen's example of children being forced to forgive and forget is so insidious. They don't have the ability to see wrongful acts as anything but belong to them.
Joe(a work in progress)Nation