@hawkeye10,
Quote:maybe there was one main factor that drove his problems, maybe there was one main failure of the collective that made the blood flow.
Hawkeye - you complained about victim culture, and then contribute to it.
Victim culture seeks to remove personal responsibility by placing 'blame' or 'fault', or by using others actions as an excuse to justify their own action (or lack of action) <often the 'he/she made me ...' argument>, or by letting circumstances define who they are (implying or saying outright, they are 'powerless to be otherwise' because of circumstance).
There is a huge difference between contributing circumstances and personal responsibility. The collective did not
make the blood flow, though their actions contributed to his decision - the personal responsibility for that decision rests with Rodger.
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And something from many pages back. Rodger had a very low self worth, but a very large ego.
I see Self Worth as the value you see in yourself - which is not subject to how others interact with you. Examples:
- I value working hard, and as I work hard, this is something that makes me worthwhile to me
- I value growing each day...so even if others suck think I suck at 'something'...the fact that I work to improve even that aspect of my life makes me worthwhile to me
- I value compassion and have lots of it...but even if I fail at it and get criticised for it...I realise that I am human and make mistakes, and work to ever grow my compassion...and that makes me worthwhile to me. (you could replace compassion with 'a kind heart' or any such)
- I value respect - both towards myself and towards others...fill in the rest...
- etc
It's
what you value - that you see in yourself - that leads you to value that in yourself. The more that you value - that you see in yourself - and value in yourself, the higher your self worth.
And of course, when I say '
what you value', I'm not talking about genetic values, but behavioural / character values.
Ego on the other hand, doesn't find it's foundation in such things, and is prone to react positively or negatively to others interactions with you.