Sat 9 Feb, 2013 10:33 pm
There is a time in our life, when we realize that everything is about choices. We have the liberty of choosing how to live, how to reach, perhaps how to fall. I made one that brought me here, even thought I could regret it, I do not, because besides the difficulties I faced, I learned to rise from the deepest hole, stronger, and wiser. My experience taught me that there are no real barriers such as language, money or education in front of determination. If somebody were to ask me if I feel satisfied with myself, my answer would be no, because I am not stopping here.
Who would have known, that a letter would change my life forever? I received my appointment to the U.S. Consulate in Ciudad Juarez to finish with the process of my U.S. Residency 1 year ago. My mind was struggling to determine whether I was happy, or worried of the eminent destruction of my life. Most of my family was here, but in Mexico, I was just about to leave behind my plans, school, friends… my happiness. One day, my mind froze with the words of my mother – It is your choice –. After a couple of non-sleeping days, I realized that life is about sacrifices, and taking risks. One week after, I was on a road pointing straight forward to the United States of America.
Communication, I found out how important it was when I wasn’t able to perform it. My soul was destroyed when I bought a t-shirt and I stood there trying to understand the meaning of “Do you have a quarter?” that the cashier was asking to me. Those days were full of regret, my mind did not think of anything else but failure and impotence. Was the education that I have always dreamed even possible? My mind was negative, until I understood how difficulties can turn into motivation along with the portals toward achievements.
Yes, I have always been limited. The economic resources of my family have never been plenty. In many ways they have been an obstacle, in others, they have been a fear, but also they have been my force. Since I was going to go to College for free in Mexico, the high amount of money that the higher education in the United States costs took me by surprise. I admit that is one reason for which my dreams got torn in a certain moment. I discovered that my family cannot help me, even if they want to, but I realized too, that the money is not powerful enough to stop me, it has not done it before, and is not going to do it now. I am going to give every part of me to make my dreams a reality; there is no other purpose in my life than doing so. I know that effort pays back, and not necessarily with money.
I arrived to the conclusion, that blaming my school for the lack of good education that it faces is worthless. It might be a disadvantage, but I see it as an opportunity to learn how to improve myself. I knew that it was not going to be easy to teach myself what my school could not, but I am, because that is my desire, and it pushes me to give everything I can in order to accomplish it. I thank, at the end, this challenge, as all the other challenges that I have faced, they showed me that I should ask myself everyday: “Why should I limit myself to the standard”? I look forward to answering myself: “I should not, and I will not”.
I understand now, how everything is about choices. I chose to rise from the deepest holes, I chose, to sacrifice my entire life to make my dreams come true, to learn a language with a shortage of time, to fight strong, and to dream big. My mind realized that from all of the risks that I have taken, the only one that I would not take is not having taken any. I learned to see lights through the shadows of the challenges. Since then, my promise was to see every one as a learning experience, and that I would never stop, no matter how many times I fall, or how difficult it becomes. I believe that what comes next will be even more challenging, but I believe, too, that every challenge will take the best of me, I choose success. I can tell, then, that If somebody were to ask me if I feel satisfied with myself, my answer would be no, because I am not stopping here.