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Just want to be a father

 
 
Reply Sat 21 Jul, 2012 05:45 am
They live with their mom ages 6 & 7 within close proximity to me. I like to see them everyday and do for the most part but its difficult to deal with their mother. Tonight we got into a big argument that did not end well. She says I will not be able to see them anymore and they will be moving overseas in March due to her husbands pcs requirements.

That being said she is very proficient when it comes to taking care of their diet and hygiene etc... I couldn't ask for more in this department. They have their own room loads of toys including a pricey minature car, and regular dental visits. I know she loves them and cares about them a great deal but her negative outlook at most times is cause for concern. She is a very pessimistic person but it comes off like a split personality in my eyes.

As for myself I'm at a low point in my life. Since being laid off at the beginning of the the year I haven't been able to find a decent job, I live with my sister, and find it hard to take care of myself at times.

Can I trust her? I honestly don't know so I guess the answer is 'no'. Her agression and short temper may lead to problems along the road and is definetly affecting the kids. At the pinnicle of an argument she always resorts to breaking things and becoming violent wether it be with me or her husband. She actually threatened to kill me tonight in front of the kids although I brush it off as nothing the kids are not as mentally strong. I prayed for their safety after leaving them of which I do not pray too often.

I worry about their well being as she has given my daughter bruises from a hanger of which I took pics of. She tells me often when she spanks them and they do aswell. She will often push them down out of agression and allowes her husband to discipline them physically as well. "Mommy threw me and Jane, Jane's back was all red and her neck too." They made plans to sneak out and walk to my house during the night and actually partially removed the screen from their window when I couldn't see them due to problems with their mother.

If she does not let me see them I will go to court for some sort of custody agreement and/or call cps on her. At the same time it would destroy her and adversly affect the kids if they get taken away. She also has a kid of her own and is pregnant. I need to put my needs aside and figure out whats best for the children.

Alternatively, if I get my **** together get my own place and some stability she has previously agreed to give me custody. This would be a win win for everyone. Damnit living here is so expensive, I need time. A good slap in the face to get moving. Even if I won't do it for myself I will do it for them...
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jespah
 
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Reply Sat 21 Jul, 2012 06:14 am
Erm, okay. Thanks for venting.

If you feel your children are being physically abused, call not just CPS but also the judge who ruled on custody and ask to reopen the case.
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