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I ate meat. How can I get my friends to move on?

 
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Jan, 2012 12:46 am
@roger,
roger wrote:
e_brown once told me to bite his chalupa. I've been wondering about that ever since.

Wish he hadn't left us, by the way.
Is that sanitary ?
0 Replies
 
shewolfnm
 
  4  
Reply Wed 18 Jan, 2012 08:58 am
the elitism over diet choices is absolutely pathetic.

people who obsess over food like that have some real issues that mimic many eating disorders. Sadly, there is no category or definition for that obsession yet because it is new, extremely popular and people still believe its 'healthy' ( to obsess I mean)

... I mean, seriously..if you obsess over every calorie you eat, every piece of food you see and your friends diets, you are judging those who DONT eat like you do and spend all day concerned about food, there is a problem. I dont care HOW healthy the diet is, obsession like that is not healthy.
People are spending too much time using their diet choice as a point of judgment too. I see all too often, especially here in the land of starving yuppies , that people actually judge others intelligence, life and thought process all based on what they eat. Its scary, sad and if it were about anything else would be considered something to go to a therapist for and seek serious help. Control freaks behave like that.. abusers behave like that, but if people behave like that about FOOD... its ok? really? Scary.

its only in an overly privileged, very wealthy country full of abundance that there IS time to hate and judge people over FOOD. Obviously we all have too much and just dont know what to do with ourselves. Laughing

its one thing to know what is good and bad and do your own research

its another to judge, hate and actually accept or deny friends over food..
shewolfnm
 
  2  
Reply Wed 18 Jan, 2012 09:00 am
how to get them to move on?

hmm.. maybe move on to new friends who have lives that involve something other than food

or

how about this. It ISNT their business. Your body isnt theres so it doesnt matter. They have the choice over their own body, you have yours.... end of story.

it isnt like you are taking drugs, or stealing... you are eating something your body needs. Protein. i would tell them "so what" Smile
0 Replies
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Jan, 2012 11:18 am
@shewolfnm,
I dissent from the notion
that we shud have fewer privileges.





David
0 Replies
 
FBM
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Jan, 2012 11:39 am
"If God didn't intend for us to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat?"
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 04:43 am
Hehehehehehe . . .

roger
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 04:56 am
@OmSigDAVID,
Good possibility. Another might be that the group (unofficial club) made such a big deal out of looking down their pointy noses at omnivores that it becomes some kind of point of honor.
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failures art
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 06:50 am
@shewolfnm,
To be fair to OP--while I agree she's being overly self conscious about what her friends think--I wouldn't characterize vegetarianism as "food" elitism. Animals aren't simply food that you don't eat, they are other sentient life you don't wish to kill and eat for your own satisfaction. It's a moral position, not a matter of counting calories. I know I don't spend my day obsessing over food. In fact, my own vegan diet has become so routine in my life, it's mundane. That said, I'd be annoyed if I had friends who took enjoyment over teasing me about it. Some people find a great deal of entertainment in this sort of thing.

e.g. - Last week I learned that the Thai place in my neighbor hood puts fish sauce in their curries. This was sad for me, and I have been ordering these curries. This was upsetting to me because in the past, I had directly asked if there was fish sauce and they have said they can make it without. Apparently this was lip service, because a later server would tell me that their sauce is pre-prepared and they can't take it out. I was telling a coworker about my frustration about how the previous server had been poorly informed, too lazy to ask the cooks, or simply didn't care. Another coworker chimed in: "haha... you ate animals!"

e.g. - I used to grab a Pop tart from the cafe at work in the mornings. I had read the ingredients, but I had not seen that it had gelatin. One morning I discovered it did have gelatin, and so I said: "bummer" and gave my second Pop tart to a coworker. They proceeded to eat it in front of me theatrically with exaggerated noises etc. The sort of look what you're missing out on shtick.

My circumstances are different than OP, but I sympathize with her even if I think she's taking herself too seriously. She choose to eat some meat. There's a lot of social pressure to eat meat. She regretted it, and feared being teased.

A
R
T
shewolfnm
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 10:35 am
@failures art,
Its not the TYPE of diet i am referring to. It isnt arrogance to decide to or abide by outlines of a particular way of eating.

It is the behavior unfortunately that is common with *most* people who abide by it that I am referring to.
I know that is a very general statement that catches a ton of people who DO not qualify for it.. but, just like other stereotypes .. that generality is based in truth due to common , repetitive actions by many.

People teasing you for it.. a spin off of the behavior
The peta type person who decides to scream and fight someone who is eating chicken... is a form of the elitism im speaking of..


Here in Austin, which I call the land of starving yuppies.. people WILL deliberately call someone OUT if they are eating something they do not think is ok. At whole foods grocery store it is common place to sit in the market and hear people loudly having conversations about how 'stupid people are' for eating ( meat, only veggies, fast food..etc) at a deliberate decibel so that the person the statement is aimed at will hear too.
People walk up to others tables and will stand there and tell them how what they are eating is bad. The elitism here is absolutely disgusting and rampant. I know this is not common elsewhere so my statement and idea may not be too clear to all.. but that is the behavior I speak of..

There is even this new 'paleo diet' that is taking over here.. those people? do the same thing. Preach to others about how their non meat diet is horrible.

*sigh*
shewolfnm
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 10:41 am
@failures art,
failures art wrote:


My circumstances are different than OP, but I sympathize with her even if I think she's taking herself too seriously. She choose to eat some meat. There's a lot of social pressure to eat meat. She regretted it, and feared being teased.


I see that point too. 100%.

You are on my f/b .... you see how I post about and what my stance is on food. In my mind it isnt just about the unnecessary using of excessive resources that is problematic for people. It is also the lab chemicals we are being fed.

I can PROVE the dangers of food chemicals with just one or two clicks of the mouse on google... and people still shun me, call me odd, tell me its NOT true.. etc. etc. And i am not even prescribing to a diet outline, im just aware of what is IN food. When people tell me they are having specific problems that I KNOW are related to common chemicals , i TELL them because I know that eliminating a few things would help. But that is seen as 'holier than thou' or obsessive.

I get it. Having a thought process, knowledge and ideas that go against the grain of the hairs of the other lemmings sucks. And people DO slam you for it... But there comes a point when what you choose to do, eat or think is not always anyone elses business. Which is why I told the OP that.

Its not her friends business because it is not THEIR body that ingested the meat. I understand having that in common.... a few of my friends that are aware of chemicals in their foods too will call me to discuss how they felt after eating something and the feeling IS odd to hear them eat things like that. But good friends dont obsess and ridicule.And I wonder about her set of friends.

but i also realize that is a huge judgment on those people based only on 2 paragraphs..
0 Replies
 
failures art
 
  3  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 01:07 pm
@shewolfnm,
Paleo is huge in the Crossfit community. We encounter it frequently. While it gathers a lot of elitism, it might be circumstantial. Activities like Crossfit gather a lot of people looking to feel elite. The two marry very well.

I think it's obnoxious to harass people for their choices. I'm not a huge fan of PETA. I visit their site only to cross check their shopping guide on products. They are really active here in DC, and demonstrate in Chinatown frequently. Walking down 7th st, one volunteer jump out in front of me and declared (with a bit of an angry face) that I needed to go Vegan. I told her I was, and her face softened and she smiled. While I was pleased to not have someone in my face anymore, I was turned off by the idea that this meant she treated people in two ways (in-crowd verse out-crowd).

I go to monthly vegan dinner club potlucks. The topic of discussion is never about how morally inferior the omnivores are. We usually talk about football, travel, work, and other normal life stuff.

I think there are some generational/age things at play here. I take OP to be younger. If she's in school, dietary programs are pretty rigidly structured. Her choice may make her feel self conscious because in our youth we are often very worried about the things that make us stand out from our peers.

A
R
T
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 01:35 pm
@failures art,
well I'm a freegan
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FBM
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Jan, 2012 11:54 pm
@Setanta,
LOL.... Mr. Green
0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jan, 2012 08:43 pm
@shewolfnm,
shewolfnm wrote:

Here in Austin, which I call the land of starving yuppies.. people WILL deliberately call someone OUT if they are eating something they do not think is ok. At whole foods grocery store it is common place to sit in the market and hear people loudly having conversations about how 'stupid people are' for eating ( meat, only veggies, fast food..etc) at a deliberate decibel so that the person the statement is aimed at will hear too.
People walk up to others tables and will stand there and tell them how what they are eating is bad. The elitism here is absolutely disgusting and rampant. I know this is not common elsewhere so my statement and idea may not be too clear to all.. but that is the behavior I speak of..



I've never had that happen to me, but I can certainly see someone doing it. I don't know about the yuppies, seems to me the hipsters are more like that (if what I'm thinking about hipsters are true).

To the OP, it sound to me like your friends are just ******* pretentious.

I love the type of person who has to announce to you immediately after meeting them "I'm a vegetarian". I always want to respond "I'm an Episcopalian"

I was at a temp job back in November. 4 of us were working on a month long project. This one chick, Kate had just moved here about a week ago, from Pittsburgh.

Within literally 2 minutes of we 4 strangers meeting, she made that announcement. My first thought was "Oh honey, you don't know anything about Austin, do you?"
Anyway, by the end of that 1st day, she felt she had to reinforce that not only to us, but to anyone else she talked to. She was about 25, had just got her masters in political science, and was at the stage where she knew more about everything than anyone else, even if they were decades older.

I saw withing the first week that, although she didn't eat meat, she did smoke about a pack a day, apparantly went out most nights and have a few drinks, drank gallons of coffee since she only managed to get about 5-6 hours of sleep a night, and when I did she her eat something, it would be a pop tart, or cake balls someone had made.

I casually asked her at about 2 weeks why she was a vegetarian. She said something about hormones, but didn't have anything else to say when I then asked her if she didn't think the cigs, alcohol, sugar and lack of sleep were doing more damage.

The funniest thing was, she never once noticed during that entire month that she never once saw me eat meat. I do eat meat, just not as a habit.

That's because someone could go for years and never notice their friend never eats dairy, or something else, if they never brought it up.
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