I can't win unless I am willing to lose.

I play poker. Poker is a game that forces you to think in the long term. Poker is a game of skill and over the long term a good poker player will do a whole lot better than average players. But the fact is that even the best poker players in the world lose most of their games.

A good poker player focuses on the situation he is in at that moment. You think about what is the optimal way to act right now, not worrying about winning or losing. Poker forces you to accept that fact that even playing perfectly you may lose everything. So all you can do is focus on making your best move with the resources and information you have at the moment.

Winning and losing are distractions. Any emotion be it worry or desire or excitement or fear or disappointment or exuberance will impact my ability to think dispassionately about what is optimal play in the moment. You have to put all that aside and make the best decision dispassionately.

It strikes me that this is a good lesson for life. The focus should be on doing what is best with the information and resources we have and not worrying about winning or losing or other short term concerns.