Merry Andrew, It's my philosophy to be kind to "everybody." I'm just not good when it goes from push to shove, and I just dislike bigots.
oeo, that's awful. Where are the heroes?
I have had to be on the recieving end a number of times in my life. Now I had rather be taken advantage of than try to decipher the good from the bad. The only times I refuse are the times a scam is obvious, such as the time I saw half a dozen different young men walking about with empty gas cans, begging change to get their car home, all on the same street inside the space of half an hour.
I expect honesty if they expect something from me. There are too many examples of financial artistes pretending to be in need. There have been a number of exposes in the local paper.
Where I used to work, there was a regular group of pan-handlers in the neighbourhood. They knew that I'd ask what the money was for. If they said booze/drugs, I'd give them a little bit of change. If they said food, I'd take them to buy some food, maybe a hotdog, or an apple and a coffee, a muffin and milk. Something. If they said all they needed was a job, or a place to stay, I'd tell them about the nearby resources, sometimes walk them over. If they said food, and balked when I offered to buy, I'd tell 'em no. I told 'em I just wanted the truth. They often wanted to shake my hand after I bought them a meal. Some of them knew to ask me if they really needed help with something. A new guy came into the neighbourhood. Wanted some money. I asked what for. Food. Ok, I'll buy you some. He started hollering at me. A couple of the other guys came over and told him to back off - explained the rules - and they apologized to me for him.
There's one young guy near where I work now. He is clearly quite troubled. Every time I see him I think his mother must wonder where and how he is. He holds doors open for people on the way to the subway. I thank him every night, and every Friday I make sure I have some money for him. I went back one Friday because I'd gone a different direction and missed him.
The guy in the suit? He's unlikely to get anything from me. My thinking's a lot like Sugar's on this. He can go back and find his wallet, or ask someone in his office to spring him cabfare. I've also had a few too many weirdly creepy experiences with guys in suits asking for money.
I draw the line when I see young, healthy looking men with their hand out. Or those that beg with one hand while puffing on a ciggie with the other. Even when I smoked, that just rubbed me the wrong way.
This discussion of legitimate needy reminded me of the time i was arguing with my conservative MD brother-in-law about the needy in our society. In frustration, I fiinally said "George, do you believe there are any, even one person, who is down and out through no fault of their own?" I asked him not to rush an answer but to really think about it.
He took ihis time and said "No. There are no needy people in our society. There are only people who don't want to work."
welcome Billy, I'll have to think that over. I am sure there are people who are down and out through no fault of their own.. I'll have to think about this....
Billy's brother-in-law certainly doesn't know much about the world.
Um, you're right, ehBeth. I know a lot of those types. Staunch conservatives until they're laid off, or cancer strikes, or some such twist of fate. I call them "overnight liberals."
How about the other way around? I know a guy who was totally liberal in his younger day but once he acquired a bit of money and a piece of property, he's about an inch away from becoming a staunch republican.