she's describing a parenting style, not necessarily the ethnicity of the parents
look up every word they didn't know and memorize its exact meaning.
Quote:she's describing a parenting style, not necessarily the ethnicity of the parents
She certainly didn't say that in the article originally posted.
I'm using the term "Chinese mother" loosely. I know some Korean, Indian, Jamaican, Irish and Ghanaian parents who qualify too. Conversely, I know some mothers of Chinese heritage, almost always born in the West, who are not Chinese mothers, by choice or otherwise. I'm also using the term "Western parents" loosely. Western parents come in all varieties.
[Chua's] sweeping statements do begin to pall after a while, but what saves "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother," and makes Ms. Chua ultimately an endearing presence, is her ability to be candid about her excesses and poke fun at herself.
When it comes to parenting, the Chinese seem to produce children who display academic excellence, musical mastery and professional success.
Just a small part of a very interesting article -
Things a Chinese mother never allows their child to do:
attend a sleepover
• have a playdate
• be in a school play
• complain about not being in a school play
• watch TV or play computer games
• choose their own extracurricular activities
• get any grade less than an A
• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama
• play any instrument other than the piano or violin
• not play the piano or violin.
The vast majority of the Chinese mothers believe their children can be "the best" students, that "academic achievement reflects successful parenting," and if children did not excel at school then there was "a problem" and parents "were not doing their job." Chinese parents spend approximately 10 times as long every day drilling academic activities with their children.
Chinese mothers can say to their daughters, "Hey fatty—lose some weight." Chinese parents can say, "You're lazy.
This is an extremely interesting article about how/why Chinese children seem to be more successful than the average Western child.
By Rachel Emma Silverman
Amy Chua, in her provocative piece in Saturday’s WSJ, described her own particularly strict, results-oriented “Chinese” parenting style: no playdates, no TV, no computer games, hours of music practice.
As parents of two young boys, my husband and I are trying out a drastically different style: Laissez-faire, the way my parents did it.
My parents, professionals who both worked full-time, were very low pressure. There were few mandates to do homework, get As, or practice our instruments for my brother, sister and me. Unlike the Chua kids, we were in school plays, were allowed to watch TV until we “were blue in the face,” my mom jokes, and we attended plenty of sleepovers and playdates. Our kitchen was so stocked with junk food (and our TV had so many cable channels) that some of our friends preferred to hang out in our basement as we were considered a “fun house.”
So how did my parents’ laissez-faire parenting style turn out? My brother, sister and I all enjoyed school, got top grades and went to Harvard or Yale. Although I was never great at music, my brother and sister became top-notch musicians, and my sister even sings professionally. The three of us are doing just fine career-wise in financial services, journalism, education and music.
It just goes to show there are lots of ways to raise a kid—and achieve results of success and happiness, however you define them. Like Chua, I’m not saying that my parents’ way would work for all families; surely it wouldn’t. My parents were lucky in that all three of us were internally-driven, worked hard without needing much parental pressure and rarely abused the freedom they gave us. If we did, I wonder how laid back they could have been. My parents were neither overly anxious nor coddling; they simply placed a lot of trust in us and we tried hard not to let them down. To be sure, we grew up in an environment where success was the norm: In an academic town, Princeton, N.J., with enriching schools and with smart, successful, book-loving parents whose behavior we could model. And I’m not sure I’ll emulate their style completely: I’m not really into TV or junk food myself.
Ultimately, my husband and I hope to fine-tune our style depending on our kids’ personalities, interests and internal drive, rather than to impose anything on them from the get-go. Call me the anti-Chua.
Chinese parents spend approximately 10 times as long every day drilling academic activities with their children...