9
   

That writer really stinks!

 
 
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 10:21 am
I was reading an essay in my newpaper today that discussed "author scented candles" that one could use to enhance their reading experience. I googled it to see what was up.

Here are some of the candles:

Edgar Allan Poe (a mix of patchouli, absinthe and sandalwood),
Jane Austen (gardenia, tuberose and jasmine)
Henry Thoreau (a blend of cedar, moss and juniper)
Walt Whitman (grass, thyme and clover),
Charles Dickens (tangerine,juniper and clove).

The author of the essay went on to suggest a few scents:

Dr. Suess (eggs (green), ham (ditto), fish (multicolored))
John Steinbeck (grapes (wrathful), sardines (canned), tortillias (flat))
P.G. Wodehouse (a wry odor called "Jeeves" that follows you around the room)
Herman Melville (brine, blubber, odour de scrivner)

I started wondering what I would smell like if I were a candle.
Cut grass and wet dog? Cake (baking) and coffee? All of them mixed together? Hmmmmm.......

And I started wondering what the book I'm reading (The Lonely Polygamist") might smell like..... An old couch, messy children and califlower casserole?

And what might some of my favorite books smell like? Or some of my favorite authors?

Or what you might smell like if you were a candle?
Or what the book you're reading might smell like?
Or what your favorite author might smell like?
Or.... anything reading related that you think smells.

C'mon, play along!

 
plainoldme
 
  3  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 10:45 am
I have to think about this. It sounds like fun.

What would Margaret Atwood and David Lodge smell like?

I suspect Atwood would smell of a combination of Canadian forests; old fairy tale books printed on pulpy paper; raw silk and green salads.

David would smell of rain dampened tweeds; coffee (not tea) spiked with Scotch and English leather cologne.
0 Replies
 
dyslexia
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 12:32 pm
Richard Brautigan would smell like watermelon sugar and Gary Snyder's motorcycle.
0 Replies
 
djjd62
 
  4  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 12:45 pm
listening to a Miss Read book right now

Dora Jessie Saint MBE née Shafe (born 17 April 1913), best known by the pen name Miss Read, is an English novelist, by profession a schoolmistress.

Saint wrote a series of novels from 1955 to 1996. Her work centred on two fictional English villages, Fairacre and Thrush Green. The principal character in the Fairacre books, Miss Read, is an unmarried schoolteacher in a small village school, an acerbic and yet compassionate observer of village life. Saint's novels are wry regional social comedies, laced with gentle humour and subtle social commentary. She is also a keen observer of nature and the changing seasons.


i imagine they would smell of climbing roses, fresh cut hay and chalk dust
OmSigDAVID
 
  3  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 12:52 pm
@boomerang,
When I was studying, reading several centuries-old cases of litigation
for law school, I liked to have a personal link with ancient times.
Sometimes, I held an ancient coin in my hands from the Roman Republic.

I had another that was minted when Jesus was on Earth.

I also had a $10 gold piece from 1795, the earliest year of any gold from the USA,
in the largest denomination that was issued (until 1849).
George Washington signed a statute authorizing Alexander Hamilton to mint that coin.

I like nostalgia. I 'm an old reactionary.





David
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 12:54 pm
I picture Jim Crace like a breeze coming off the sea on a cool day.

Alice Munroe would smell like apple cider.

David Sedaris would be a combination of ciagarettes, Febreeze and lawn gnome.
0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 12:55 pm
@boomerang,
My favorite authors?
Ray Bradbury: ozone, cinnamon, and a hint of burnt leaves.

First, I don't recommend the Chuck Palahniuk candle (patchouli, blood, men's sweat, and ... what does ennui or nihilism smell like?)

I have to think about what Joyce Carol Oates, Margaret Atwood, and James Morrow might smell like ... okay that's now what I meant... how their literary output might smell like...?
tsarstepan
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 01:03 pm
@OmSigDAVID,
OmSigDAVID wrote:

When I was studying several centuries-old cases of litigation
for law school, I liked to have a personal link with ancient times.
Sometimes, I held an ancient coin in my hands from the Roman Republic. I had another that was minted when Jesus was on Earth.

David

So you would say that a candle for the authors of these legal documents would best fitted with a candle that has a tinny metallic tinge mixed with slowly decaying parchment, and a hint of a slightly stuffy no~public~allowed map room of a old-world university research library.

As an nonpracticing historian, I really would love to get this candle. My favorite part of my collegiate history research was walking around the university library stacks.
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 01:13 pm
@tsarstepan,
OmSigDAVID wrote:

When I was studying several centuries-old cases of litigation
for law school, I liked to have a personal link with ancient times.
Sometimes, I held an ancient coin in my hands from the Roman Republic.
I had another that was minted when Jesus was on Earth.

David
tsarstepan wrote:
So you would say that a candle for the authors of these legal documents would best fitted with a candle that has a tinny metallic tinge mixed with slowly decaying parchment, and a hint of a slightly stuffy no~public~allowed map room of a old-world university research library.

As an nonpracticing historian, I really would love to get this candle. My favorite part of my collegiate history research was walking around the university library stacks.
That 's plausible; I actually HAVE and had a scented candle that a friend gave me for Christmas.
I 've not made much use of the candle.





David
0 Replies
 
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 01:49 pm
@djjd62,
I've only heard the name Miss Read but had no idea who she was. You've made me want to pick up her books.
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 04:03 pm
@tsarstepan,
Quote:
what does ennui or nihilism smell like?


Iron, mothballs and a whiff of old farts.
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 04:08 pm
@dlowan,
I was thinking more on the lines of vanilla, caramel, and whiskey. Maybe the ennui you have in your refrigerator has spoiled?http://i45.tinypic.com/1531mvr.jpg
0 Replies
 
djjd62
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 04:09 pm
@boomerang,
boomerang wrote:
P.G. Wodehouse (a wry odor called "Jeeves" that follows you around the room)


i would have thought gin, leather and a slight tang of turkish cigarette if in the city, substitute tweed for leather if in the country
0 Replies
 
djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 04:11 pm
@plainoldme,
i've read and or listened to almost all the Fairacre stories (the Thrush Green didn't do much for me), they're pleasant light reads
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 05:25 pm
@boomerang,
Philip Roth (Portnoy's Complaint, etc) would probably smell like chopped liver. Smile

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portnoy%27s_Complaint
tsarstepan
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 05:31 pm
@msolga,
I never read any Philip Roth but I bet his perfume might be a big seller in the indie-hipster ironic-vegetarian crowd.
djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 05:36 pm
i'm glad boomer started this thread, i saw those candles a few weeks ago in canada's version of barnes and noble, chapters, and meant to bring them up but forgot
msolga
 
  3  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 05:36 pm
@tsarstepan,
Liver (both chopped & raw) has a special significance in Portnoy's Complaint, tsar.
And I am far too modest & concerned about delicate sensibilities to discuss the details here.
You have to read it to know.
0 Replies
 
tsarstepan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 05:43 pm
@djjd62,
There are actual real candles?? Cool.... I thought this was only intellectual masturbation.
plainoldme
 
  2  
Reply Sun 12 Dec, 2010 05:45 pm
@msolga,
I do believe Roth would smell of chopped liver and warmed orange juice ( a popular Florida cure for constipation).
 

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