Whats wrong with having as many children as I want

Let see beyond the question of population growth a fairly dead issue when we are talking about the Western world there are a few concerns.

Oh, you are from Africa or living there where children are sadly still dying in large numbers from lack of food/shelter/care and over population is a very large issue.

If you had wish for girls then adopting a few and therefore giving them a brighter future would seem to be a more moral way to go off hand then just having a few more children in the hope of changing the sex ratio in your family.

In any case, even if you are lucky enough to have all the finances resources needed to raised such a family how about parenting time for each child?

Seem that there is no way you are not going to be short changing your children in parenting time.

What makes us unique is our uniqueness the point is I should be able to make my choices not based on guilt but based on what fulfills me as an individual. I am a social activist and my children though seperate personalities are an extension of some of my values which is to live life to the full. Give as much as you can love as much as you can care as much as you can and so on. The problem is that you might care more about different issues than me. For example I care about eradicating computer iliteracy and poverty from africa. I might not make a dent but what if as a social unit through my family and extended family this was acheived then what.

The question should be why do people feel they have the moral right to judge other peoples choices just because it does not fit there own limited mind set?

Its because they are limited by there own mental map of what they would do thinking that what ever choices they would make would be the right. Your statement is your definition and I love to see things from other peoples prospective thanks for sharing any more thoughts out there.

I'm just trying to let this thread sink in.

Okay, lorvise.

You've asked a lot of questions here. I've no idea what a single birth family is and whether your family qualifies for that honour (or dishonour, for that matter).

But regarding people judging you on the basis of the size of your family, of course it's no freakin' business of theirs.

However, raising such a huge family does raise a few questions in the minds of neutral observers like me.

1) Are you financially equipped to take care of such a huge family? Will you be able of provide good education and career assistance to all of your kids?

2) Are you emotionally equipped to deal with such a large group of kids? Would you be able to give equal love and attention to all of your kids? This looks like highly impossible given the huge number.

Hi good points, I started out quite poor really as a charity worker born in the UK help was around at the age of 30 moved into running my own business and did well. made alot of money lost millions a few years ago. I only had enough for food for the family and that was a real struggle since we moved to Africa with no support. My extended family were all employed by me so no one could help us. My question is very deep because I always thought that my will and determination was always enough to step out there and dream. My children have known the best and the worst in life I look at them and they have the highest moral values that challenges even me who taught them it. They are so together and happy and have shown me so much tenderness and care. They have never complained about not having the playstations and big mac the presents that others would envy. Its been three years of hardship but three years of seeing the best of them as children who appreciate life and family. They are the most positive children I know. Now we are doing well starting to climb up again but what is a successful family one that can send there children to a private school give gifts in exchange for good loving leadership.

Hardship was the best thing that has happened to us we have de westernized ourself from the illusion of comercial success to understanding that life can only be lived in the moment of now that means the choice of happiness is in our power today and that a child that is taught the power of chosing to enjoy all thy can today as well as having the excitement that more is always on its way is the highest ideal but thats just my Map.

As for quality time lets face it most families in the west spend more time either watching TV or play games than true one to one mentoring or collective personal social activities Africa is so rich in social comunial activities. How many friends can one have I mean minigfull friends depending on your personal skills many BELEIEF ME IF YOU SEE YOUR CHILDREN AS FRIENDS ITS EASY TO BUILD GREAT RELATIONSHIPS WITH ALL FROM ONE TO TWENTY.

Having a large family has put fire up my arse to become the best I can and when we have secured our finaces i would love to adobt a few or at the very least start a orphanage.

By the way sorry for the typo

It's simply selfish.

A very strange thing to claim to care about in that one of the main problems in ending poverty in that part of the world is that the population is increasing far faster then the GNP or even the locally growth of the food supply.

Having a large family is such an area and under such conditions is setting one hell of a bad example.




May I point out that you on the one who came to us for our opinions so I see no problem with giving them to you.

Now as far as a moral rights of other people to have a problem with you decision to have a large family question, I can see in a very small food poor village for example your actions could even condemn other people children to death.

Pricing the scarce food needed to keep their children alive beyond their ability to pay for it. Under such conditions, I can see how those people would have every moral right to question your family size.

In a larger community, your actions would have no such direct impact but still it is not likely to make you too many friends and rightly so in an over populated area.

Once more, you have a strange way to express your concerns about poverty in having a large family in an area where over population is the driving cause of that poverty.

Well, maybe that's the key. Many children are not planned or wanted and most women would chose to have no more than two if given a choice, but they live in a culture or country that does not give them that choice. So if these women who are now being forced to have between 3-10 children had the option of only having two you could have your 11 without straining the resources of the earth. It's the freedom of choice that seems of utmost importance to me.

Freedom of choice hell.

We are not talking about the world as a whole unit as even with our technology the world in no yet one unit.

Having a large family in an area of the world where the population if anything is declining and where there is no mass of people starving to death is not the same as having such a large family right in the middle of an area of the earth that is destroying itself by having a runaway population growth.

Far too many people had exercise that freedom on choice only to then need to watch their children die as a result in that area of the world.

If you rewrite that in english I will respond.

here is a short english sentence for your enjoyment.

GO SCREW YOURSELF.

You just keep proving why no one here takes you seriously and why so many of us have you on ignore.

Yes that is so true................

What we need is far more of your type of ...@#@!$%# on this system who response to another person posting is to insult them.

However, disregarding my friend the Witch and the ..........

There are far too many parts of the world where right now people are dying because of lack of clean water or five dollars worth mosque netting.

The balance of freedom for the individual and the welfare of the group in such areas is not the same as in the Western world nor should it be.

Africa for the most part is under lifeboat rules and having large families is rocking the lifeboat.

If I wanted to just insult you Bill I would do so with a lot more energy and creativity. I feel I am just stating the truth about your inability to communicate in what I assume is your native tongue.

Are you done with the first task I had set you?

If so take a large glass bottle and ..........in..............

Enjoy.

In any case I am using that wonderful tool myself the ignore function so goodbye old and evil witch.

If you are equipped financially and emotionally to raise that many children, it's just fine, and noone's business but your own. If you expect the rest of us to support you, and have fewer children of our own, you are out to lunch.

I do not agree with you as there are costs and benefits to any society in people adding children to that society.

In Africa the cost far out weigh any benefits to society in having a large family.

Your wife must be exhausted.

My wife now runs a NGO with me I have never complained about the number of children we have had since most of the complaints come from others who if were going to be truly honest reject the idea not on the grounds of morality but on the grounds that they could never see them self devoting their life to raising so many children with a view of making a positive impact in the world.

Has anyone of you lived in Africa? How do you suppose that an educated person having a large family some how will add to africas problem surely with good parenting these unique children will add to the economy by developing the needed skills Africa needs to develop the continant or is that point not even going to be considered.

I agree that a man with no education plan or goal that does not have the capacity to provide for His family should never consider having a large family if any.

But as well able person what is wrong with having what ever number of children I want.