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Wed 26 Nov, 2003 09:42 pm
I have only one thing to say about Christmas. It's a ripoff. And it sux ass!
Ok, that's actually TWO things!
Opinions and poorly constructed rants here please!
Just another excuse to pick a man's pocket every twenty-fifth of December.
Bah, humbug . . .
Christmas is the best day of the year. I feel sorry for anyone too hard nosed to appreciate it.
Come on now, don't hold back..........tell us how you really feel.
Hmmmmm - now, Scummy me dear - it has been a hard year for you, I opine.
me? I love christmas - not so much the day, but the rhythm it gives the working year.
We NEED release - we NEED rest - we NEED an illusion of difference and renewal.
christmas does this. we get sill(ier than usual, in my case) - we catch up with old friends - we get a break - we drink - we eat - we party - this is good. This is the life-giving myth.
It has no religious or family hang-ups for me, BTW, so I guess I am lucky?
Bring on the revels!!!!!
But, if you are down, and such, it sure CAN suck.
So, Scummmy, it hurts to say it, but we wuv you!!!!!!
The problem is, Mr.S, you're in Australia and everything is upside down. If you could only celebrate Christmas in June, you'd probably enjoy yourself lots more, y'see...
So the shortest day came, and the year died,
And everywhere down the centuries of the snow-white world
Came people, singing, dancing,
To drive the dark away.
They lighted candles in the winter trees;
They hung their homes with evergreen;
They burned beseeching fires all night long
To keep the year alive.
And when the new year's sunshine blazed awake
They shouted, revelling.
Through all the frosty ages you can hear them,
Echoing, behind us - listen!
All the long echoes sing the same delight,
This shortest day,
As promise wakens in the sleeping land:
They carol, feast, give thanks,
And dearly love their friends, and hope for peace.
And so do we, here, now,
This year and every year.
Welcome Yule!
(Christmas Revels, 1977, S. Cooper)
As an Antipodean, in December you need to be in the Summer Solstice mode -- running amok in the woods, ravishing women and drinking lots of wine. <shaking head> Nothing wrong with your attitude that six months wouldn't fix.
SUMMER HOLIDAYS AND CHRISTMAS!!!!!
NEED I SAY MORE?????
Two good things. Two very good things. What's not to like?
Not being a christian, christmas is just another excuse to party !!! I have an invitation every day till the 20th of Dec for Christmas parties/drinks (except today - well because today I have invited everyone in my deprtment for leaving drinks
)
Oh, and I love getting prezzies (so far have just got two bottles of the (same) perfume)
So long as I ignore the commercialism, Xmas can be OK. One year I was living in the flat, everyone in all the other flats left town for the holidays. I was the only person in a block of six flats for 2 weeks over Xmas/new years. That was a year I didn't enjoy.
Christmas is okay.
The day after Thanksgiving through December 23 are AWEFUL!
Let's see what Tom Lehrer has to say about it...
One very familiar type of song is the Christmas carol. Although it is perhaps a bit out of season at this time. However, I'm informed by my "disk jockey" friends - of whom I have none, that in order to get a song popular by Christmas time, you have to start plugging it well in advance. So here goes. It has always seemed to me after all. That Christmas, with its spirit of giving, offers us all a wonderful opportunity each year to reflect on what we all most sincerely and deeply believe in.
I refer of course, to money. And yet none of the Christmas carols that you hear on the radio or in the street, even attempt to capture the true spirit of Christmas as we celebrate it in the United States. That is to say the commercial spirit. So I should like to offer the following Christmas carol for next year, as being perhaps a bit more appropriate.
Christmas time is here, by golly,
Disapproval would be folly,
Deck the halls with hunks of holly,
Fill the cup and don't say "when."
Kill the turkeys, ducks and chickens,
Mix the punch, drag out the Dickens,
Even though the prospect sickens,
Brother, here we go again.
On Christmas Day you can't get sore,
Your fellow man you must adore,
There's time to rob him all the more
The other three hundred and sixty-four.
Relations, sparing no expense'll
Send some useless old utensil,
Or a matching pen and pencil.
"Just the thing I need! How nice!"
It doesn't matter how sincere it
Is, nor how heartfelt the spirit,
Sentiment will not endear it,
What's important is the price.
Hark the Herald Tribune sings,
Advertising wondrous things.
God rest ye merry, merchants,
May you make the Yuletide pay.
Angels we have heard on high
Tell us to go out and buy!
So let the raucous sleigh bells jingle,
Hail our dear old friend Kris Kringle,
Driving his reindeer across the sky.
Don't stand underneath when they fly by.
Actually I did rather well myself, this last Christmas. The nicest present I received was a gift certificate "good at any hospital for a lobotomy". Rather thoughtful.
Zebrahead - Deck The Halls (I Hate Christmas)
[Intro]
Christmas comes just once a year (I got a baby doll)
With all its yuletide joy and cheer (I got a football)
But theres one thing I'd like to say
Is that I hate Christmas day (I got a rock!)
Its time for everybody to have a christmas party.
Everyone but me I'll step outside
Boycott your office party.
No secret Santa for me.
Mistletoe makes me sneeze anyway.
Cos I don't wanna go, where happy days are snow
I'd rather stay where
Frosty melts in the sun.
July 4 parade.
A Lynchburg lemonade.
An alcohol-a-day by the pool in the sun (now everybody sing).
[Chorus]
Deck the halls with bells of holly
'Tis the season to be jolly but,
I hate Christmas
I'm glad it only comes one time a year
Its time for everybody to head out Christmas shopping.
Everyone but me I'll stay inside.
No presents under your tree that have a nametag for me.
And it makes my gifts so easy to hide
I don't wanna go where shopping lines are slow.
I rather stay at home with the frosty cold one.
A bud on ice in may, a lazy summer day.
An alcohol-a-day by the pool in the sun (now everybody sing) .
[Chorus]
Deck the halls with bells of holly
'Tis the season to be jolly but,
I hate Christmas
I'm glad it only comes one time a year
[Rap]
It was the night before Christmas and all through the house,
All the creatures was chillin like Flint drinkin stout.
I woke from my sleep, heard 'here comes the boom'.
I knew that Santa would be comin' soon.
On Dascher on Donner, Commit, on Blitzen.
I yelled 'shut up ya'll,' but they wouldn't listen.
And then he came down with his belly of jello.
He says, 'where the ladies at cuz I'm a real jolly fellow.'
Then he gave me a wink and was quick out of sight.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a super deeky duper fly night.
[Chorus]
(now everyone - sing)
Deck the halls with bells of holly
'Tis the season to be jolly but,
I hate Christmas
I'm glad it only comes one time a year (one more time, like you mean it)
[Chorus]
Deck the halls with bells of holly
'Tis the season to be jolly but,
I hate Christmas
I'm glad it only comes one time a year
Cos I hate Christmas I'm glad it only comes one time a year
Cos I hate Christmas I'm glad it only comes one time a year
Weird Al Yankovic - Christmas At Ground Zero
It's Christmas at Ground Zero
There's music in the air
The sleigh bells are ringin' and the carolers are singin'
While the air raid sirens blare
It's Christmas at Ground Zero
The button has been pressed
The radio just let us know
That this is not a test
Everywhere the atom bombs are droppin'
It's the end of all humanity
No more time for last minute shoppin'
It's time to face your final destiny
Well, it's Christmas at Ground Zero
There's panic in the crowd
We can dodge debris while we trim the tree
Underneath a mushroom cloud
{siren}
You might hear some reindeer on your rooftop
Or Jack Frost on your windowsill
But if someone's climbin' down your chimney
You better load your gun and shoot to kill
Oh, it's Christmas at Ground Zero
And if the radiation level's okay
I'll go out with you and see the all new
Mutations on New Year's Day
It's Christmas at Ground Zero
Just seconds left to go
I'll duck and cover with my yuletide lover
Underneath the mistletoe
It's Christmas at Ground Zero
Now the missiles are on their way
What a crazy fluke we're gonna get nuked
On this jolly holiday
What a crazy fluke we're gonna get nuked
On this jolly holiday
jus spreading that ol' fashioned Chirstmas spirit. . .
I can't imagine it being cold at Christmas - beaches and mangoes - and they both need heat!
In the cold weather, you'd look funny in a bikini, too!
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