Marriage Culture

Reply Tue 4 May, 2010 08:55 am
I'm not so sharp in these things, I may speak entirely out of ignorence, but here's my shot.

Holiday20310401;150136 wrote:
Where did the ideal that one ought to get married in the first place come from? Did it come from within, or did it come elsewhere?
Think it's a bit of flok instinct, the need of grouping together, form friendship and bonds, the need for perpetual providing for the baby, it would be very inconvienent if the provider ran off all the time, sure there are such, but fortunaly very few, that's where the compassion instinct kicks in, providing for the flock, those you may not have any direct relation to.

TranscendHumanit;150037 wrote:
Marriage being important to me, I wonder about how other people feel about marriage. I think marriage is for people who love each other and also at life-point where they can make economic benefit to each other. I do not think anyone have to do what they don't want, but I have always wanted husband who provide money and I take care of his home for him. I still want to write book while I do this, but I believe if someone take care of you you should be obedient to them; and also not to show infidelity or divorce them just because they make you mad.
Hehe, an issue that has been since dawn of man, just look at the old scribture of Lillith and Eve. Lillith was actually the first woman and considerd herself equal to Adam, because they were created from the same earth/clay?, thus wouldn't be submissive to Adam, they bickerd alot.

Then God created Even who were submissive, thus no bickering with Adam.

TranscendHumanit;150037 wrote:
I read that in the west people are divorced all the time, and some people in Singapore do like that also. But I do not see why they even get married if they want to live like that. I also read that some people, some people like feminist, do not like marriage and think that women should not cook and clean for man. But why not? Why should man want a wife who does not make his life better?
1) many western women get high education, or have a good understanding of human behaviour and it's psycoligically effects, thus realizing a man can be selfish, incompetent, lazy, stupid ..etc, where as many eastern women will be extremely submissive and belive in certain values that overwrite the understanding of shortcomings in man.

2) most western women will demand reason and logic, where such things are not demanded from eastern women, defending honor, pride and lineage are more valued.

3) in west reason and logic are not taught, only vaguely hinted, but in a selifsh way in the west, usually it is only taught from friends who will tell you anything you want, and rarely tell you no, you are an idiot doing this and that.
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Reply Tue 4 May, 2010 09:24 am
kennethamy;155224 wrote:
Married men are healthier and live longer than either single men, or widowed or divorced men. And although a poor marriage takes its toll, the statistics tell us that even men in poor marriages do better.

and i am pretty sure statistics also show that women without partners, whether single, divorced or widowed, do way better than women with partners or single men...could be lots of reasons for that of course...

the thing about a woman being submissive is a cultural thing. and also comes from the time when men were the providers, which they still are in many countries, but not in the west. so now they have reached the point in america where men and women realize they dont need each other for anything...but they also arent happy alone. so how to start over and find a way of relating to each other in some way that works?

me, i have always been the submissive type-but it doesnt work out well with the western man, because he thinks that type of woman is a fool and he has no respect for her.

back in the day when i was in school, most women did not go to college and just became a 'housewife' and the husband was not exactly the big boss of the family, but the woman simply didnt take any interest in financial matters or political ideas, or anything that related to the world outside of her home. trust me, it really was like that in america too not that long ago. things have certainly changed.

it is very funny to see the rate at which india is catching up-for instance, now women are working as well in the big cities, but they still do all the household stuff-there is a major blowup waiting to happen. and yes, divorce is now beginning to catch on. there are even matrimonial ads for divorcees, when there is still a part of the culture that wont even allow a widow or widower to remarry.
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