Women (Women Join us please)

I have found out of extensive experience that when i treat women a equals they want nothing to do with me. But when i am angy with them and feeling (and so acting) like a jerk the response to me is much more to the effect that i desire. I do not know why but when i show love (this seems to be the common consensus with my male friends as well) i am thought to be inadiquit. Weird HUH!!!

Sad but true

Can i get a wittness

---------- Post added 09-18-2009 at 02:27 PM ----------

Tell me ladies. How is it that a man can sweep a woman off of her feet? I would like to hear this in reality as opposed to a story book.

You have to find the right woman for you, one who will give you love in return, but you have to respect her first. And the same goes for men, if you all treat each other with a bit of decency and humanity then you will have a mutual respect for each other and will all get along.

---------- Post added 09-18-2009 at 02:32 PM ----------

Yo cant use force, it's just babaric, not right. So if you stop doing this, (that's if you are doing this in the first place), you will be able to give something and get something in return, take Steve Tyler for example, the lead singer of Aerosmith, (all great guys), he gives a lot, has fun on stage, doesn't take himself too seriously, and lots of women adore him.

I think lots of women love steve tyler because hes a rockstar with alot of money and influence. Then comes the love that he gives them (if any). Note that Mr. Tyler was around at the advent of the term "Groupies"

I am not forcefull i am gentle and caring I would not raise a child with brute force and so i would not treat a woman with brute force as this would teach my child to do so. I strive for this ideal becaues to give is to recieve and as i said before I crave affection. I dont like being forcefull i feel it brings the worst out of people. Especialy if it is totaly unnessacary.

And i would also like to add that you, Ms. Caroline, seem to me to be quite different (in a good way) then the average woman.

Thanks

No I love Steve Tyler for his music, he's fun and strong minded, believes in good values, (Janies Got a Gun, a song by Aerosmith, about sexual abuse between father and daughter) and he rocks! Great lyrics tto, fine musician, man who loves. Isn't he married anyway, whose values are you judging him on, I mean do you really know him, only you see the surface.

---------- Post added 09-18-2009 at 03:05 PM ----------

And thanks for the compliment V. appreciate it and glad you thinks so.

Once again you seem to be a woman who thinks well about things and is open minded about the world, (Janies Got a Gun, a song by Aerosmith, about sexual abuse between father and daughter) as i said. Most people men and women alike do not think as you do.

Thanks

Alex

Well that song is really strong in meaning and Im sure it helped alot of others get through the dark times. I like it but I really like the song Eat the Rich. Its a good video, lots of leather and chains and big black poisonous spiders.

I was just reading about chivalry and courtly love. It seems that I am a natural born knight. But in my contempt for humanity I seem to have lost some of my knightly morals. I shall strive to get them back and given some time I think that should not be too difficult. This conversation has been very enlightening. I appreciate it and I hope that it keeps going.

Thanks

Vajrasattva

Thank You V.
I appreciate it.

Hey V. I just Tweeted us/this thread.
Thanks.

I don't recall Don Quixote having much luck with the ladies...

You know I don't recall that story DT, how does it go, please?
Thanks.

His chivalry was an idea - a constant and persistent quest. In the story, there's left open the very idea of 'her' existence. But it's the source of all he does; ostensibly.

It's a great book, reviewed it a while back at this link

Yeah looks a good story, I will pick it up sometime, look forward to it.
I like these following quotes especially, they are very nice, chilvalrous, much better then ideas. Thank You Khethil[INDENT] 1. "Consider, friend, that woman is an imperfect creature, and that one should not lay stumbling blocks in her way to make her trip and fall, but rather remove them and clear the way before her, that should may without hindrance advance towards her proper perfection which consists in being virtuous... The good woman is to be looked after and prized, like a fine garden full of roses and other flowers, the owner of which suffers nobody to walk among them or touch anything, but only at a distance, and through iron rails, to enjoy its fragrance and beauty".
[/INDENT][INDENT] 2. "For the obligations of returning benefits and favours received, are ties which obstruct the free agency of the mind. Happy the man, to whom heaven has given a morsel of bread, without laying him under the obligation of thanking any other for it than heaven itself".[/INDENT]

Don Quixote recalls a girl from his youth and idealizes this rough, probably unattractive peasant woman into the most beautiful and graceful princess who ever lived.



Well, the lady Don Quixote has in mind has a real source of inspiration - the girl he met once in his younger years. However, Lady Dulcinea, as Don Quixote imagines her to be, is complete fantasy.

Which is the bulk of the book - reality versus perception. I share an early critic's opinion that Don Quixote would have fared better without his companion, Sancho Panza, and his constant trampling upon Don Quixote's idealism and imaginative vision.

Love is too complex too answer these questions. And it shouldn't be analyzed.
Its hard to admit and I have no intention to hurt but usually when you cant get a woman weather your rich or not, handsome or not, the problem is usually you. You might have some major problems that deter women and some other problems not so big but visible that deter woman. Whatever it is, the problem is usually yourself. And everyone goes through this one way or another at some point in their lives.

i think that my problem is that i miss the signals that they give me. I tend to be blind when it comes to the opposite sex.

I do feel however that the "LOVE" in the world today is a very superficial affair on both sides of the coin (male and felmale).

Ever go someplace that advertised something grand, but then when you got there found out it was just more junk?

What do you mean to "get women" Who in their right mind would want to "get women?" I have always said, that a woman who advertised that she was looking for men, was a woman I would not want to be around. There is something very wrong in thinking in the plural when it comes to the opposite sex.

A woman is the life of man--not women are the life of a man.

If one were really interested in a woman, one would reach the conclusion that love is not pleasure, nor an emotion, but love is all the things two people do together to sustain and promote their lives.

I have always thought that a man needed only one friend, his wife. That is such an awesome thing to achieve in one's life.

If I were you, I would work on something more fundamental than how many women one may or may not get, but why, and how to best make something of value with her. j.c.

I dont mean plural im just using an expression. I need one woman. And in order to find a sutiable and compatible woman usualy more then one sutiable woman is nessasary. In other words if you mary the first woman that would have you then the odds of the mariage working out is less than if you have more that one woman to chose from. its the same for women they need many attracted men in oder to chose the most sutible and compatible of them.

This is an interesting thread...some interesting thoughts in it.

I'll add my own analysis (because I do think relationships, obtaining them and keeping them, is worth analyzing...it can help us better understand ourselves and our partner(s)) and hopefully not overlap too much

.
I have several male friends who are in the same boat: By most matrices, they should have women lining up at their door to snatch them up and yet they remain dateless day after day, year after year.

In observing them, other people, and studying a little psychology and sociology, I've concluded a few things.

1 - To claim there are simply these two categories is over-simplifying the situation. There do appear to be these two categories, but there are subcategories of each as well...and each subcategories has it's parallel subcategory in the other category. Chances are if you are able to move from Cat 2 to Cat 1, your shift will be to the parallel. Likewise, a person can shift from Cat 1 to Cat 2, and it's usually to the parallel.

2 - The subcategories of Cat 2 appear to be (but are not limited to) the following fellows:
- Mr. Ego
- Mr. Creepy
- Mr. Boring
- Mr. Woe Is Me
- Mr. Too Passionate
- Mr. Lack of Confidence
- Mr. Self Underestimated
- Mr. Desperate

Usually these archetypes come in packaged deals, but there is a primary "trait".

All seem to come with the last guy there, Mr. Desperate. And Mr. Desperate is really very complicated...The trick to Mr. Desperate is that women can smell it (and likewise, men can smell it on women...when everything is boiled down to it's elemental features, neither men nor women are terribly complicated...you just have to contemplate -why- a person is doing or not doing something and you'll probably have stumbled across an almost universal "truth.").

So Mr. Desperate rears his head in each of the other subtypes of Cat 2. Desperation is not a lack of confidence, but it can be perceived as such because of the other traits a person has.

It's also worth noting that these traits are incredibly complicated and pervasive...and usually are traits that close friends and family won't even notice because friends and family are more likely to see the flip-sides of them.

So if you really are Cat 2 (which is sounds like you probably are, based on your personality), figure out which subcategory you are and then analyze what it is about that subcategory that is unattractive to most (if not all) women.

If I had to guess, based on your personality in this thread, you are probably the classic "Artist Geek" make-up: Mr. Ego, Mr. Desperate, Mr. Self Underestimated, and Mr. Woe Is Me (all in varying portions).

Now remember that each of these traits have positive flip-sides to them...they are all both attractive and unattractive (hence is why it all seems so complicated).

The key to moving from Cat 2 to Cat 1 is recognizing that Mr. Ego doesn't have to be so concerned with how he is perceived by his potential ladyfriend - that he can relax, stop trying to impress her so much and focus more on who she is rather than who he thinks she wants him to be; it's seeing that Mr. Desperate's flip side is indeed love in its purest form - an acceptance of oneself as well as of one's ladyfriend and of everything that goes into that relationship...and letting go of the self-doubts; it's knowing the Mr. Self Underestimated does not become an ego-maniac just because he gains a backbone and shows pride in himself and his work; it's knowing that Mr. Woe Is Me has been too much of a focal point in his life and figuring out how to be happy with what he has been "given" in life.

Make sense? I hope so :p

(Incidentally, the guess really is a guess and may not reflect you at all...but I'm hoping that in explaining those traits' flip-sides a little bit it might make more sense how the others work as well).

One more thing: With true confidence comes a sense that you're fine on your own - it is that lack of desperation which is particularly attractive to a woman, rather than the confidence itself. It's the knowing that she will be your world, but that your world is not codependent on her existence. That is, that your world has more geographic regions than simply her.

Hope it helps!