The "Monday Flu"...... again.

What does he do on the days he's home "sick"?

Is he allowed to get out of bed? allowed to leave his room?

Most of my friends with kids go the "you're sick, you'll need to stay in bed with a book" route. No tv, no computer, no being oot and aboot. They usually prefer school to "in bed, with a book". My friend P was particularly evil she'd turn off the radio, and keep the curtains drawn, make 'em stay in bed the entire day. The poor kids were in isolation - with a book (both boys hated to read independently til they were in their early teens). Worked though. I'm not sure I could ever have pulled it off.

... no interesting meals either - no grilled cheese, hamburgers, no "what do you think you'd like to eat". Clear broth and saltines.

anecdotally, I'd say the majority do - I seem to hear about this a LOT.

I allow books and movies but that's it. It's no fun for him and he knows it won't be fun. When he gets antsy we "use this as a good chance to get ahead on homework".

When he's really sick he does't want to do anything but stay in bed so one of the big clues he's faking is that he's constantly asking to go somewhere or do something or be allowed to play games.

boomer, it could be psychosomatic problems. I had that when I was little. It developed because some days I was afraid to go to school.

I agree. My older daughter went through this - though not every Monday. For some reason every spring time over a series of a few years.

She would go to the office and complain that she felt sick. As she is a quiet girl and not one to get into any trouble everyone believed she was really sick - the teacher, the office, mom and dad. They sent her home and about an hour after getting home she felt better.

The second time this happen, I called the school and asked if she could come in the next day. School policy is if a child is sent home sick they have to be out the next day as well (I think partially to keep parents from sending kids to school when they are sick). I spoke with the principal about how after an hour being home she felt better - the principal agreed that she was to come to school the next day (so as not to reward the "fake" sick).

I discussed that I didn't think she was faking, but maybe was in her head - felt nervous (she is known to get tummy aches when she gets nervous). So the school also agreed that they would not be so quick to send her home in the future. They would allow her to rest for a little while and then check her.

That seemed to work.

I've considered psychosomatic problems.

With Mo, it's so hard to know.

I have a feeling he's on the "outs" with a good friend as he has been seeking out the company of different friends over the last week.

Do you think allergies could have played a part, Linkat?

The week before last Mo was having some pretty seriously weird behavior. Last week I started giving him a Clariten (spelling?) each morning before school. Things really improved.

Today he told me "I think I'm allergic to that school".

Truth be told, they have had some air quality problems at the school this year. They had to do a big overhaul on one particular classroom (not Mo's). They say the problem has been solved but.....

I have spent some portion of my life with allergic rhinitis. Just this week over a day I probably sneezed two hundred times. I am used to it, it comes with the spring winds.

Really, if your child gets all stuffed up in school, work with it. Teach him about allergy.

Experts vary on shots. I had them for a couple of years and was minimally better. I don't know enough to mock them.

my kids used to fake being sick, but that does not work for me. Over time we have moved to a system where if they dont want to go they ask, tell me the real reason, and I either say yes or no.

They rarely get into any trouble of significants, are almost always on the honor roll,so I dont sweat it. Even back when I was in school skipping days or classes was one of the perks of good performance, as evidenced by grades.

My mom and dad were the same way.

Actually, my school was the same way -- if you kept your grades up they didn't care if you attended class or not.

I don't know how old you are but things have changed since I was in school. They don't even allow kids to leave the campus for lunch anymore.

you will be shocked then to hear that here in Olympia the campus is open, my kids often go out to lunch, and they are in class only sometimes. I get a computer call when ever they are marked absent, but what normally happens I am told is that in some classes they routinely check in at the beginning of class, and then go do something less boring.

I am class of 1980, and in 1977 my school started to crack down, before that it was hippity-dippity. The schools we had our kids in while in California and Arizona were often of the military/prison mentality. I was shocked when we got here. Olympia in many ways is freaky, kinda time warp hippy and new age greener with a bunch of us military families thrown in at the same time. I kinda like it.

Anyway, I hope it does not take too long to get to the bottom if this thing with Mo. My first guess is that he knows you are not loving his school, so he expects a sympathetic ear when he wants to not put up with it, but this is a guess only.

Jane used to fake illness in first and second grade and she was a real drama
queen about it. Even the seen-it-all school nurse fell for her. They called me
at work and I had to rush to school and get the little princess. The minute we
got into the car she felt already better. Nonetheless, when we got home she
always went straight to bed, curtains drawn and for at least 3 hours I let her
lay in her room without anything to do. She was cured as fast as lightening.....
until she tried again a few months later.

From 3rd grade on, she loved school and still does. She even goes when she
feels a bit sickish.

Sometimes the kids just want to stay home, they feel comfortable at home
and they like being with Mom, so there doesn't have to be a problem in school
or with the other kids, Mo probably just wants to extend his weekend with
you, boomer.

I hadn't thought of that - she tends to complain about stomach pains or feeling sick like throwing up sick so I never considered it. Since we have taken the route of having her "rest" for a while at school, she hasn't been sent home.

What are his sleeping habits like? We (too) often let things get out of hand over the weekend -- she'll sometimes sleep in on Saturday morning (because she's tired from the week) which then means that she's not tired Saturday night (plus we're often doing things 'til late) then sleeps in Sunday morning and is a bear to get to bed early enough Sunday night and then Monday morning is DRAMA.

And when she's really tired she does feel sick, but it's mostly about the tiredness. I have to really order her to get UP already when that happens, but once she gets to school she's usually fine (and then she goes to bed early Monday night and things usually level off after that).

Hey Boomer - this time of year - all of mine go through the I don't want to go to school phase. They have learned that they get to stay in their bed without TV or video games. We don't have a television in their room and that way I know if they claim illness they probably are really sick or certainly traumatized by something going on at school. It is hard for me...because if they are faking it - they whine all day long. So to be honest they don't use the "I'm sick" excuse anymore. Because they are truly bored out of their mind.

My 6 year old has started this "everyone is mean to me at school" excuse now. He is trying to play upon my sympathies. There are only some days that are like that and it is usually Mondays. I have seen him at school too. He is just fine...I don't see any picking and his teacher assures me he is happy - he never comes home saying that either. It only comes in the morning when I wake him up and start making him get dressed.

It is the end of the school year blues as far as I am concerned. I am longing for summer just as much as he is to be honest.

I think that also (and I meant to say this in the last post but forgot) that daylight saving time does a number on 'em. I talked to the school secretary the Monday after DST and she looked rather haggard, I asked her if she was OK and she said "things are always crazy around here after DST."

Several of my friends talked about their kids being impossible to rouse on Mondays for several weeks after DST.

Maybe not the only factor but a contributor to why now, especially when paired with the additional light in the evenings. (As in, it got dark at around 7 right when DST happened [6 right before], now it gets dark around 8.)

The Monday flu strikes again.

And we've had another episode between the time I posted this thread and now.

<sigh>

SonofEva tried this a few times before we put an end to it. The rule in our house became: "If you have a fever or you're throwing up, you stay at home. Otherwise, you go to school."

Many days I gave him a dose of Tylenol or PeptoBismol and took him to school. As we explained, Mom and Dad can't stay home just because they have a headache, and neither can you. You'll have to work through it.

All of this stopped when he hit middle school because they expected the students to keep up with classwork AND homework for all missed days...even if they were on a trip or sick at home. Hospitalization was just about the only out. They didn't want students falling behind. This meant parents had to pick up the work at school each day (or the teachers would e-mail it), and SonofEva had to do the same amount of work as if he'd been there. Except, of course, his parents would have to explain stuff instead of his teacher. Well, we weren't nearly as patient as his teachers! He quickly learned it was easier not to miss school.

I suggest you make it tougher for Mo to miss school. This is a bad habit, and you need to help him stop it now. It's going to get more and more difficult to keep up if he has frequent absences in higher grades.