Bid to be bridesmaid

heh, the "chariots of fire wedding"...I wouldn't do that myself, but I can definately see where she's coming from.

If I knew my guests would like a certain something, or if I really wanted a particular thing, screw "that's not ettiquette". Who's paying for this deal anyway?

I don't think the bare feet is that unusual, I can see how it would go with a certain style.

The other kidding around stuff, that's where I can see where she's coming from. It seems she was totally like "hey, this is NOT some serious Queen of England coronation going on here, I'm just getting married, just like most people in the world end up getting married.

Life's too short to worry about if the chocolate doves match the finger bowls, or if the people in charge of making the rainbow over the bride and groom when they're saying "I do" get the perfect shade of violet by spraying the exact perfect amount of water.

It's not Disney World people.

No matter how hard you try, someone is gonna get drunk and pass out under the wedding cake table.

Now whats wrong with that??

(hiccup)

As long as their having a good time...

true true true.....


but, I think that would upset a fairy princess bride.

probably so...but no way to get around it...especially when television shows glorify being bridezillas and making it look funny or acceptable.

Missy you looked stunning in your wedding dress! You're very beautiful!

When I get married it's gonna be sweet n easy. In my county you can walk into the courthouse...get a license .... walk into another room and get married. In and out in 30 minutes.

Romantic, eh? As long as the one I love is standin' beside me.....damn straight baby! Damn straight!

Then we'll take all that money we saved and go on a kick ass honeymoon.

And that, ladies and gentlemen ......will be my perfect wedding!

HA - that's a similar one to mine She....

my little fella was an IVF baby - he took 4 years to make...

I got the "YES" from the gynae... OMG... what a day. I made a 20ft banner (yeah, I know, big and loud) and put on it.... "Daddy C. Lassoo Stork" (from Jommy Stewarts - It's A Wonderful Life) and placed it across the front door and garden. My (ex)hub was cycling into London at the time, so on his return home he cycled up and saw the banner! It was certainly a day to remember. Many tears.

'Fraid Chai I am fairytale world... thatsme. But I kinda like it that way, better than reality world at times.

MISSY - I knew you ver were beautiful.... inside and out.... but...PAPA DIXIE - how darn handsome is he a? OH MY

That's how most of our German weddings are, Brooke. Fast and easy without
much ado. My wedding was easy and mostly improvised (so was my marriage)

You indeed looked very beautiful mismi and your Daddy has the typical
ambivalent look on his face where he is happy for you, yet he mourns losing
his little girl.

Lovely photo, mismi. And I like your dress, TTH. It's something I would have chosen if I could've.

I had a pretty religious ceremony. We were the first kids on either side to get married so the parents went all out or as all out as possible but I doubt it was one of those going into debt things. Just, kinda large. There hadn't been a wedding on my side in quite a while, lotsa family came, you get the idea.

Pictures are around somewhere, might even be some scanned, I'll look for 'em later. Since I'm overweight and was then (I weighed less then, actually), it was quite a chore to find a gown for me. I was insulted in one delightful place, I remember the girl pulling the dress around me, securing it with clothespins and pulling it hard. Then she and her assistant told my mother and me that they would cater to all weddings, even the most modest, and told us that it would be an additional 20% because of the larger size gown. Basically, they were saying, in a not so subtle fashion, that I was heavy enough that no one would ever love me -- man, nasty! My mother and I walked out. No one needs that kind of treatment, not when you're going to drop what we ended up dropping. What jerks!

The place I went to was very nice and they had a lot of choices in my size. I was pleasantly surprised to not be the largest bride there (you can imagine how the other places had been messing with my self-esteem). My mother also got her dress there. We got the bridesmaids' gowns next door. I recall I picked out about 3 dozen possibles one day and then had the bridesmaids come with me when they were all free and they just picked out what they wanted out of what I'd chosen. I think my cousin ended up with something outside of what I'd picked anyway. I've been to weddings where everything the bridesmaids wore and their entire look, e. g. hair, makeup, nails, shoes, etc. was dictated by the bride. All I really cared about were the colors and a vague idea of the dress. After that I figured they were all adults and would wear and look however they wished.

Very very cool! So how'd the improvised marriage work out??

Friend of mine saw a wedding dress a couple years ago that she just had to have. So she purchases this dress with NO planned wedding. She actually was engaged though...just no dates.

Now.....2 years later (still no wedding) and she finds out she's pregnant. The big wedding went down the shoots and she's now getting married on a houseboat next Friday night! And the dress doesn't fit her anymore.

I'm gonna avoid all that crap and do it the easy way!

Oy it was sheer chaos, and I knew it wouldn't last when I got older and wiser.
Now we're both much happier while leading quite different lives.

I danced at so many weddings, big and small, expensive and cheap, but
what I really like to attend to are second (marriage) weddings. They're less frills, more tender loving and relaxing.

If I ever remarried - HA - gosh that sounds weird even saying that ...... man, it would be VERY different.


Plain, simple..... I could imagine in a forest.... probably no family, just the boys... and the closest friends.... and flat shoes or bare feet!!!!!!





(invites will be posted on A2K...... now, just gotta get divorced, have a fella find me and see if the toad turns into the Prince - warts and all) :wink:


(good job I'm laughing a?)

For my first wedding, we had a formal ceremony at my parents' house. I actually made my dress, we had flowers, 3-tier cake, rented chairs, table service, etc. Invited 50-60 relatives and friends. Took a 3-day honeymoon before he started a new job...whole thing was a major headache. (So was the marriage, but that's another story.)

For my second wedding, we spent $50 at a small wedding chapel with four guests (my brother and sister and a couple of friends.) Then we spent $200 on a private dinner for the six of us with a small custom cake and champagne. Then we spent $6,000 on a Caribbean cruise for a honeymoon. It was just right. Our 25th anniversary is next month.

I'm glad I did the formal thing once, but that was enough.
Nobody should have to go through that more than once.

Sorry to hear something like this jespah. My oldest sister is overweight and she is not treated so kindly. It makes me mad to hear what people say. She has a great husband, kids and grandkids. I told her she is lucky and to just ignore those type of people. What makes her beautiful is the person she is inside.

Funny you say that. I have never met an overweight person that I did not like. What makes them so sweet, I don't know.....but they are. Oh, I'm sure there are some that aren't .......but for the most part I find myself smiling at every overweight person that I pass by on the street because I'm just pretty sure that they are one awesome person. With one huggable heart.

Really? I don't find heavy people that different than the rest of the population. Some good, some not so good. I had a really mean overweight science teacher in high school and at the same time a really wonderful overweight art teacher. They even looked a little alike. The science teacher made me cringe in fear, the art teacher I adored for being funny and encouraging. I admit I made fat jokes about the science teacher, but never, ever for a moment did I think such things about my art teacher. In todays society, I think someone has to be really overweight for me to even notice, most adults are carrying some extra weight around, it's become a norm. A business owner who insults overweight customers should find a new line of work that does not involve people - or maybe s/he should become a telemarketer.

I was a bridesmaid ONCE and because the g'd Matron of Whatever had two kids, I had to do all that shite with this friend. You know, glueing **** on tiny hats, making signs (correctly spaced and using Lettraset and her f'g wedding colours) for the roads, bottling and labelling wine from a winery, organizing the stag (ugh), taking pictures of the "not-so-happy couple", etc etc. We had to wear a 2 piece silk eucalyptus green outfit that went to the ground and dye our shoes to match. It was UGLY. What the hell colour is that? Plus, her MOH was 6' and I am 5'2" so ... yeah, try getting an outfit that fit both body types and sizes. We paid for our own outfits but she bought us both 2 sets of pearl earrings and a lovely pearl necklace as a thank you. I deserved it but Matron of Nothing -- uh nope! C'est la vie.

I wore a light pink dress and top at my wedding and told my bridesmaid to wear whatever she wanted. She chose a dark pink cocktail dress. We had it in our backyard during a beer strike (hence more hard alcohol) - it was 90 deg out and flaming HOT. Luckily we had a lot of shade. Basically, just another excuse for a Newfie party.

I paid for all the food but various people cooked things for me (ham, roast, turkey). Lots of people brought salads. Cake was $35 (I don't have a sweet tooth so didn't give a ****) - really, it was a low-key, fun, big party - you know, Let's All Do the Time Warp Again, kind of thing. I don't take much too seriously.

With any luck, some day I'll post my wedding polaroid. Or hurl the jellyfish at the small banquet towards the side plates...

plus myriad other dishes amongst the few of us.

Whatever. It is the marriage that matters, or doesn't.




Figuring that out is the problem.

yeah....2nd weddings are cool, for the reasons cj said.

priorities are straight, more relaxed, you can tell that both people are both just enjoying being with each other, and just, well...there.

If the first marriage didn't work out, you are really glad you are just there, and are taking this second opportunity.


Brooke, my first marriage would have been a slightly larger affair, but right off the bat I realized it would have been nothing but grief.

I had moved up to Wisconsin to live with this guy I'd dated in Fla. The business he worked for moved up there. Only reason I went was that I got laid off my job and I thought, well, I've never seen Wisconsin, what the hell.

Long story short, we decided to get married after a few months, but we knew absolutely no one, except the couple of people we'd met from our jobs. More acquantancies that anything.

The ex had grown up in NYC, and, know my parents, who'd he'd never even met, lived in NJ, he had an idea. He still had a lot of good friends in NY, and knew a friend w/ an art gallery where we could have a reception, and even knew a priest who would perform the ceremony. Well, I figured having a priest perform the ceremony would make my parents, well mother, happy, so I thought this would be great.

I even went out and put a down payment on some tea length wedding dress, thinking that even a small wedding deserved a fancy dress, since family would be there.

When I told my mother about the NYC idea, you would have thought I'd suggested she go into the bowels of hell. It was beyond her that she would go and hour and a half away into the "CITY". My mother was a real whiney bitch, to be totally honest, and I knew nothing I would plan there would keep her from thinking I was doing all this just to ruin her life. I mean, it wasn't like I was the one getting married or anything.

So, instead the ex and I decided to just do it there in Wisconsin, and have his mother and 3 sisters come, and my mother, father and sister.

I lost the down payment on the wedding dress, but I wasn't going to wear one for a judge with like 6 people there. That would have been pathetic.

But.....when I let the folks know it would be in Wisconsin, in April, I think about 4 months away, disaster struck (sic) I called one evening and let them know we would do it right there, and I'd find a nice hotel for them to stay in.....my ex's family didn't have any money, so all 4 of them were going to have to stay in our 2 bedroom apt. My parents were loaded, and could stay anywhere they wanted.

My father, who put me into therapy years after he died, got on the line and immediately asked "So, you expect me to go to Wisconsin because you're getting married there?" (as God is my witness, that's exactly what he said).

Well, yes....

"So, how do I get to your place from the airport?"

Well, I don't know the exact directions from the airport, but this is going to be in 4 months, so I'll be able to tell you way before then.

"How do you expect me to say I'll come to Wisconsin if you can't even tell me how to get to your place?".....I am totally not kidding, this is burned in my memory.

Dad, are you telling me you don't know if you'll come to my wedding because I can't tell you 4 months before hand how to drive from the airport to my apartment?

"Well, yeah, how do you expect me to go there when I don't have directions?"

I'm not at all embarrassed to say my next words were "**** you, then don't come" before the phone got hung up.

To my credit, they sent me this $10,000 check as a wedding present and I tore the damn thing up.

The two of them deserved each other.

This doesn't anger or upset me anymore, but just because you're over something doesn't mean you don't remember, or that bringing it up means something negative. That's just the way it was for the way I got married the first time.

My wedding story....

I am so glad my husband is nothing like that to me, or his daughter, and makes me very grateful for having him in my life.

Oh Mame, you just won my heart forever with that rant.

I would rather run through a dynamite factory with a lit torch than have to do that crap.