THE BRITISH THREAD II

But English isn't a foreign language.







:wink:

I apologise for my error in saying this-



4 to 3 is, of course, about 11 to 8.

Anyway, the chap scrunched up his bottle and won the £4 grand. I gather he took no further chances and went away with £8,000 and good luck to him.

I wondered afterwards if a contestant from Aberdeen might have been certain Wigan is in Lancashire from his reading of Orwell.

I for one have always disliked Conrad Black.

Yes, the captains of industry think and behave differently from the rest of us; I would forgive high-handedness and the occasional impropriety.
But when they are caught with their hands in the till, they should be subject to the same laws as the "little people" who pay taxes.

No matter how educated, intelligent and urbane they might be.

Rubbish!

Well, if you're going to get caught and convicted, USA is the place to do it. He didn't get convicted of racketeering, though, did he? Reminds you of the '20s, doesn't it?

Further, I believe the Cdn prison system is much more lenient, and he no longer has the option of spending his incarceration here. Tsk tsk... one ought to never close doors...

The reason why the subject of smoking arouses such fury is that the pros and cons are fairly evenly balanced. New legislation often appears at that point in a debate. There were plenty of rabid anti-smokers in the old days using exactly the same arguments, if often not as scientific.

Both sides have a point. Are even both right. And that is what causes the heat and passion in the debate and the contortions and distortions employed in it.

Not by me though. I would make the same argument whether I smoked or not.


You see- what all this means is that when the pros and cons are evenly balanced the side that shouts the loudest will win and they will obviously have shouted loudest that the pros and cons are not evenly balanced asserting two brass-assed lies to prove it.

But it is the shouting loudest that is the key. Smokers are too intelligent and laid back or busy with other things to feel the need to shout at everybody so it was a one-sided contest from the start.

And what it fortells is that there will be more and more legislation thought up to provide shouting opportunities for the stupid, hung-up and bored section of the population who are addicted to shouting and that the Shouting the Loudest Party ( a Lab/Con/Lib Dem coalition ) will rule all our lives in an increasingly astringent manner possibly culminating in us all being fitted with an anal tag, monitored in local control rooms, so that if we should happen to overstep the alloted 35 farts a day allowance (which is the average last time it was measured) we get surcharged over and above the rate set in the budget to pay for the network of local control rooms which are under the aegis of the Food and Standards Agency after a vicious turf war in Cabinet and leaving something over for the usual offices.

Motorboating thus becoming a privilege of the well-to-do except for special occasions such as Christmas afternoons when everyone makes free with their assets.

You appear to be suffering from depression Spendi, if I were you, I'd forget all about it and go and get pissed, its doing you no good at all dwelling on things you cannot change!

Don't be such a gump.

It amuses me no end to watch you silly sods sleepwalking into the tangle of red tape you self-evidently have an ardent fetishistic desire to embrace and be pecked by every beak the Shouting Loudest Party can think up now they have discovered how to do long winded versions of "Hello Mum" on telly.

What a defeatist attitude "you cannot change" represents. That is flying the white flag from every rampart. That is an emblematic symbol of depression.

I hope you don't convey such servile attitudes to apprentice boxers.

Not at all it's making certain they train and establish the will to win that is all important!

Your banging your head against a brick wall though mate! there is no fight left in this little lot and the government know it. It seems a phone call shut down fourteen Tesco stores yesterday!

One phone call?

That must have cost some money, who's footing the bill for it all?

You haven't quite got it right though Spendi, your the one should be making a stand. Your not though! Your barking on here like a bloody King Charles Spaniel with a ribbon in your hair instead of being outside your local with a big placard and then going in and lighting up!

Your an ex serviceman and you can't have a bloody fag with your pint!

Well if they had even thought of implementing this little charade with the lads from WW2 (my old man being one ) the bloody pubs would have been wrecked, they'd never have taken the ash trays out even.

What are they after?

Ninety nine year old vegetarians with brain diseases, pissing their pants and sitting in fancy coffee shops (one time pubs) supping tea and eating scones and cream cakes!

Come on mate, get real your the bloody sheep, your being taken to the bloody abattoir like 'lambs to the slaughter.'


So you stand at the bar now like bloody wimps, moaning and groaning about how good it used to be and waiting for your name to be called out!

"Yes Sir, Private Spendi on his way Sir, how hard do you want to kick me in the bollocks Sir"

"Wearing the wrong clothes for a Tuesday night am I Sir, Sorry about that Sir, I'll not make that mistake again Sir"

You bloody wanker Spendi!

You'll be wiping Browns arse with pieces of confetti if he comes in your pub and tells you to!


I'm giving up because I want to get fit for a particular trip I'm making after Christmas and I have to be 100% fit to even consider it. I'm running up flights of steps thirty to forty times a day, lifting weights, cycling thirty /forty mile a day! I can't think of smoking pal, and I know it.

That's what I call serious angst treatment when fags are eschwed. I hope the population doesn't start following your example. There isn't enough flights of steps assuming running up your own stairs gets banned as it soon would under the Be Friendly To Your Neighbours Act.

If I ever do get humiliated in the manner you describe, or even some milder versions which your poetic licence wouldn't stoop to mention, at least I will be a reluctant victim and insinuate graded ground glass granules into the confetti rather than rushing at it enthusiastically with my tongue on the wag.

I don't do placards.

When 600 odd, and they are odd to want power over us, MPs vote to ban smoking in public places and exempt their own place of work, and presumably other palaces, they are into serious piss-taking and the rubbing of our noses into their own confections.

And on their own propaganda delaying the implementation of their vote for over a year killed 600 people.

I want to know where Smorgs is, and if DP has been to the Cloud Bar yet.

It's certainly not weather for being outside.

Anybody seen Steve?

I have just strolled home from the almost empty but pristine pub in which any farts would have smelled like the proverbial falling tree in the forest sounds when there are no ears to hear it. Noses were in short supply which is surprising after all that shite about them staying away because they were being assailed by smokers is a thing of the past.

It was a lovely night. Overcast I know but mild. Certainly not weather one wouldn't necessarily wish to be outside in.

It'll be "Lights Out" at 10 o'clock before the cock crows thrice.

Didn't go there, too hot: 36°C even at 19:00h!


('We' lost 2:4, and the Ranger supporters loved the local beer extremely well, according to the local press ..... and the police report.)

From the Ranger's website:

Follow, follow, we will follow Rangers
Anywhere, everywhere, we will follow on
Follow follow, we will follow Rangers
If they go to Lippstadt we will follow on.

(Usually followed by a song whose words I can't print sung to the tune of "Marching Through Georgia")

Absolutely fascinating isn't it.

There was even an allusion to a dirty bit. Snigger, snigger.

I'm really happy for Mr McCoist having declared himself "happy" despite the stifling heat. With no-one injured they must have been out for a stroll.

It's amazing what non-smokers have to do to try to give some meaning to their extra-long lives.

Not tried Cloud Bar yet. Don't think I could afford the drinks, MCT.

Going to see Blondie on Wednesday though at the Apollo. Should be interesting.

My daughter breaks up for summer hols on Friday and I'm really looking forward to spending days with her, just hope the weather cheers up.

We saw Blondie and the Scissor Sisters in Edinburgh at Hogmany Christmas before last. Not quite what she was but she's holding up well. Her voice doesn't have the range it used to. Let me know how you find her.

Not dirty, Spendy you silly prat, sectarian.

Rangers v Celtic matches make Arsenal v Spurs or Liverpool v Everon matches seem like a vicarage tea party.

Quoting A.A.Gill on the dear little things who brought in the ridiculous smoking ban in pubs.





It doesn't astonish me. Shouting "Education! Education! Education!" without defining education told you everything you need to know about that load of greedy, lying, nest-feathering scumbags, and their wiggle-tongued supporters, and the sooner every piece of legislation they brought in is torn up and burned the better.

And they murdered Dr Kelly which is far worse than anything Mr Black ever did and they went to war with an ally whose whole policies are based on foundationless assertions and without the slightest idea of how to go about it and against the advice of our two most important European partners.

They were as bent as a bag of wire-wool.