THE BRITISH THREAD II

As I understand it Mac we have been more efficient at polishing one side of the ball than the Aussies. Science has not yet explained reverse swing but it works best with old balls which have been carefully tended.

Americans probably look at the game and wonder what all the fuss and complication is about.
Their batters just stand there and try to whack the ball out of the ground. That's a refreshing approach.

There seems to be a goodeal less traffic on this site nowadays. Shame.

I had some John Smith's Extra Smooth this afternoon, five pints. And a kebab.

I had a pint of Guinness Draught (yes, just one) ... nice brew, that is.

You should try Woodchuck brand, Granny SMith Hard Cider. Its an AMerican drink and doesnt leave an after- taste like a traball in your mouth.

Just a thought.

It appears to be a talent that not one of our bowlers has yet mastered. I need someone to explain to me why we're paying them such big money! Batters too?? Isn't there some sort of performance requirement?

Well - I guess it was SOME sort of performance?! Bloody appalling.

You left out running between the wickets.

I've had it, but mixed it with lager for a "snakebite".

Give over Tico. Absinthe is more like snakebite. You're just trying to talk up your tough guy hard-drinking image and doing the opposite. I've seen young ladies drinking harder stuff than cider and lager. 5%.

I've never tasted absinthe. Just stating the facts as they are. Was introduced to the "snakebite" drink at a pub in Uxbridge in 1991.

I'm sure whatever tough guy image you have of me must be well-deserved.

Snakebite recipe

Adding Black Currant makes a "Snakebite and Black." Tasty.

and fielding - and even winning the toss! Sheeesh!

Actually, our batters stand there and try to whack the ball out of the air. There is an area, called the strike zone, relative to the batter's position that pitchers must throw into to be considered a hittable pitch, and a strike if the batter does not swing.

Don't forget this is the British thread. We drink tea and wear braces, and drive on the left as God intended.

Re-read my post with "stadium" substituted for "ground" and you'll get the sense of it.

Ahh, gotcha. Carry on then.

I bet Andy Gray does not know what all the fuss is about.





(The British Thread found languishing on Page 3 (no pun intended? Sic transit gloria mundi.)

Hi Mac. I've been wondering where you were. I didn't like to raise this matter myself because I'm at cross purposes on it. On the one hand I thought he was useless as a commenter. He worked backwards from what had happened in a passage of play and then attempted with his gizmos to prove it had been planned.

But there's a far larger issue here. Every bloke I know, and I know a good few, is appalled at these women getting their shapely legs under the table of male sport. That female linesman looked ridiculous. Incongruous. She was obviously chosen on the basis of titism for a start. A 48 Double D ++ would not be allowed to do the job. A discrimination against big tits.

And she adds to expenses because she needs a separate changing room. And that is discriminatory. Every ground needs to have a ladies linesman's changing room now just in case she is appointed to a match.

But TV has been feminised. So male sport is to have lady linesmen foisted upon it for no other reason than that the TV companies are in bed with the feminisation of everything. Which is a gross insult to women. And it exposes them to the jibes of the hooligans.

The offside rule in the Torres goal was an easy one to get right. That was not the aspect of the offside rule Gray was referring to. He was meaning the inactive player rule which some of the men haven't got clear yet.

And when it comes to pass that no female linesman is appointed to a Champion's League final it becomes obvious that Wolverhampton Wanderers were insulted because the FA's little experiment was tried out on them because they don't matter much and FIFA will not have the courage of its conviction in a big match.

I hope Gray sues Sky Sports for wrongful dismissal and invasion of privacy and then the whole subject can be aired in a court.

Last night on Sky News review of tomorrow's papers Anna Botting and two old bats discussed the matter at the top of the programme and at some length and there was Egypt going into the first phases of revolution and dramatic economic news with bad Quarter 4 results from 2010 and Mr King's rather worrying speech to consider. And guess what they concluded.

50 years from now men might not be allowed on the streets in case they look at a woman funnylike.

O the bitter irony.

A struggling Liverpool sell their best striker to Chelsea for £50 million, then they go and play Chelsea away, including the striker, and they win. And Chelsea don't score, not even one.

Fifty big ones and three points, thank you very much.

The journey back home for the Scousers will never have seemed so short.

It is good innit Mac? It's these Scotsmen managers. The Rangers/Celtic game was pretty good.

Did you see the romantic scene on Corrie on Friday night when the fraught canoodling was taking place across a table on which were three plates two of which had on them, still wrapped in that off-white paper, recycled, a bag of fish and chips each and the other was being tucked into by a lad of about 8 who was shown squeezing tomato sauce onto the delicacy out of a plastic bottle and the cuts on Leanne's knuckles, which is what Peter Barlow was getting squishy over, were caused by her having punched Nick in the gob a few moments earlier for getting Peter pissed knowing he is a reforming alcoholic, she loves Peter, or says she does, and Nick loves her and is using dirty tricks to win her heart. She's an ex-prostitute and a Battersby.

But Peter's story about where he had been all the previous night, bearing in mind that the viewer knew he had been in Carla's flat, was hilarious. Carla is a teetering reforming alcoholic who Peter had been counselling, having reformed once himself, and he had gone there because he was pissed and Carla would understand and he was afraid of Leanne seeing him like that her being so watchful about him sliding back into degrading habits: a few of which she has witnessed some months ago. Carla is also the owner of Underworld, the knicker facory in which many a tasty scene has taken place and a slightly fading looker. She lacks that youthful vibrancy which the two young lesbians have as does the builder's mate's girlfried who borrowed Kevin's baby on the pretext of babysitting for him to relieve a portion of the pressure he's under and took the little lad up town for a modelling assignment or audition, and quite reasonably too as the little lad is the bonniest, cutest little lad you ever saw on TV in a cot or a tansad, and returned with a little girl much to Kevin's indignant disgust. Which he might not persevere with if the kid is chosen by a multi-national baby products chain for their upcoming advertising campaign which is what I would do with his story. He is, like Tom Jones, a "love child. Kevin was in an adulterous relationship with Molly, who was Tyrone's bride of a year or so. Tyrone being Kevin's ex-apprentice, now his parner, in a very small auto-repair business. Molly was killed in the gas explosion, in which Nick had risked his life to save Peter, and confessed to Sally, Kevin's wife, who the father of the kid was with her dying breath.

Leanne, of course, thinks Peter has been shagging Clara. The fish and chips are on the table throughout his heart-rending spiel about a fellow reforming alcoholic who rang Peter to help him get over him backsliding. Had you heard it in isolation you would have put him up for an MBE.

Cut to the Rover's Return where they are knocking it back goodstyle and Steve, the landlord, is in an impossible situation.

But all that is pretty simple compared to the Viz and Colin/John plotline. Colin/John is in protective custody possibly in a padded cell. He was led away babbling incoherently.

There's irony and there's irony.

That sounds all very interesting, but I don't think I could get into Corrie now. The leopard cannot change his spots, nor the old dog learn new tricks.

Besides, I don't think I would like it.

Interesting documentary about Betty Driver recently.

Six-pointer next Sat at Old Trafford. Come on you Super Blues.



This is tribal warfare. Did you notice, Neil Lennon would not even look at Walter Smith when they shook hands after the game.