THE BRITISH THREAD II

Before the pedants come jumping in I might inform them that I am aware that Liverpool is not in Lancashire anymore. But the gene pool doesn't not respect lines drawn on maps by gentlemen and ladies from the boundary commission which, as we all know, is the most perfected form of gerrymandering yet devised by mankind especially when it is in cahoots with the planning authorities and those who are ultimately responsible for these things.

Genetic Lancashire I had in mind.

Bloody gnashing teeth hell. It was brought down when going like a dream and jumping like a stag. The thing fell right in front of it. There was nothing my horse could do.

What a race though. Missing the Grand National is something I never do. The thought of all those men mooching around shopping centres holding their wife's hand while that race is on makes me cringe.

Spendy, I thought you were dead. I was missing the whiff of sulphur and brimstone about the place.

Good race though, wasn't it, by golly. In the paddock I liked the look of one of the greys. Good job I'm not a betting man, because it didn't start.

I've been watching your exercise in genteel foreign relations Mac. It's pitiful.

I've been playing on Trivia as usual. There was a good ten minute long stacatto session on Word Association, Use Last Letters, Change a letter, Not in my Living Room, A-Z of Occupations the other night with Dutch and myself and a newcomer whose moniker I forget. The trick is to try to stop anybody getting the top 5 posts on My Posts. He's game is old Dutch.

And I have been quite active on the dangers of evolution theory. And the tanker wreck thread.

I shouldn't respond, but....

What are you talking about, you stupid cnut?

There's no such thing as a stupid cnut Mac. Cnuts have IQs that IQ tests don't quantify for fear of making the testers look ridiculous.

"Cnut" ??? !!! Do you assume that transparent mask will protect the sensibilities of those who would be offended by **** ? I didn't realize you Brits were so given to such vaporous evasions.

Spendi has found great fault with me lately for inadequate dfefense (in his eyes) of somewhat common principles. However, I don't relish verbal battle with the unendowed as much as he.

Cnut was a king of england and still has family members alive today.

I'll have you know George that I believe I was the first to use the word on the new format A2K adopted a while back. Or at least on the threads I visited.

I was simply testing I'll admit to see if the **** had been dropped in the change.

There is, as you so astutely observe, a reluctance in the better circles in England to use the word "****" as an insult although Princess Anne has been reported to have employed the term with reference to her butler when he committed a solecism of etiquette which was unspecified.

In Skeat's Etymological English Dictionary his root 74 means to swell, to take in, to contain, to be hollow and to be strong. On the last Rabelais recommended that the oft thrown down walls of Paris should be rebuilt with cunts on the grounds that cunts are indestructible.

The root, Skeat claimed, is present in "cave", "ceiling", "celestial", "cumulus", "church" and "quaff" and is related in root 76 to "hug" and "hunch" (he doesn't mention "lunch" or "crunch") and to root 77 in "hide", "guard" and "keep". The actual roots as he gives them are KU, KUK and KDUH. To articulate these sounds it is necessary to arch the mouth and lips in a gesture of containment, shelter, protection and reception and the sound produced is roughly the same whether one is sucking or blowing. This is easiest to appreciate in emphatic usages.

Obviously, the worships and reverences on the USSC which legislated Roe/Wade were oblivious to these etymological considerations and their grave and dignified miens were not only mounting an attack on the most defenceless form of human life but on the very language itself. They effectively reversed Skeat's root meanings as one can see if one deploys the opposite of the words above.

But Skeat omits "****" which is "cunnus" in Latin, "kusthos" in Greek, "con" in French, "kutt" in German, "kunte" in Dutch and "q.efent" in ancient Egyptian. These expressions are central to the root meanings of "taking in", "containing", "hollow", "strong", "hiding" and "guarding", "swelling" and "keeping". "Womb" derives from this complex.



I will admit that I have tried to bring George's obvious intelligence and experience to bear on the antics of the "unendowed". I think that the "unendowed", if allowed to run amok unchallenged, will unendow the lot of us in their own image, their admiration of which knows no bounds, and my natural modesty leads me to believe that I am inadequate on my own to hold the line where it is now which is , Lord help us, drawn far enough from the bounds of both common sense and respectability. I think that the "unendowed" gain confidence and hubris from only having my weak and flawed opposition to contend with and that if I have to fight the good fight on my own dickheads and pricks will come to power cockadoodledoing all the way to the new Kremlin.

A failed experiment generally offers lessons to be learned for the next attempt which will, perforce, have a greater chance of success. The idea that the Soviet failure discredits state socialism is strictly for the faint of heart.

Do we know why the authorities at Augusta have made the pin positions easy for the last round?

We do indeed. Say no more.

Language! Ladies present!

This is England, where we still drape our table legs in lace or damask to protect the sensibilities of the fair ones.

However, if you think I should call Spendy a stupid **** then I do not demur. Good call. However you have enabled him to create a smokescreen and avoid answering my reasonable question.

Do you refer to "What are you taslking about?" ?

I don't think that Spendi gives that a moment's thought.

I do enjoy him though.

I'm inclined to think that the sensibilities of the ladies, particularly after Ms Austen's famous opening gambit, were not the reason for the use of veils on table legs. It was probably to avoid the sort of embarrassing scenes we sometimes see in the parade ring at racecourses on warm days if the designers of table legs were not discouraged from allowing their imaginations to run away upon free flights of fancy of a celestial nature.

Phil Mickelson deserved to win for that fantastic second shot he played on the 13th from among the trees. It was a worthy rival to the famous Bobby Jones bunker shot in 1923.

But only an English commentator could come up with the line when the camera caught Phil smiling--"He almost looks like he is enjoying it."

Tiger was a bit in-and-out as one might expect.

PS- Do American women not snigger at the dudes in shorts. There are few more distasteful sights than chap's legs. They are banned in my pub. One is forced to assume that American men must think they look attractive and fetching in shorts. They actually look ******* ridiculous. Especially the fatties sat on the front row with their knees apart.

Rumours of me being a lady are close to exageration.

Do you Americans get the chance to see our big steeplechase (the Grand National) on your TV screens?

A steeplechase is when the horses have to jump as well as run, if you don't use that word over there.

Of course they do Mac. That race is viewed worldwide.

Well you might very well think that.

I'm not talking about closed circuit betting things here: ordinary TV, news and sports reports an' that. I wouldn't be surprised if they don't.

It is not a big event here ('straylya) but the finish and highlights make the news.

No, we ('straylyans) use the word horses.

I'm absolutely quivering in excited anticipation here.

Only 15 minutes to TV history being made as the three party leaders, Mr Brown, Mr Cameron and Mr Clegg are in live debate on live TV all live and answering questions from a specially selected panel of 200 members of the public who are, if the interviews as they queued to get into the studio are anything to go by, 100% bone-fide fuckwits.

Ome promised to ask, if chosen, whether they would bring in a Robin Hood tax on the banks for the relief of poverty. Another one was intending to ask them what they are going to do for hard working families up and down the land.

It's now only 9 minutes away and the nation is coming to a standstill and I am going to have to go and prepare myself.

God save The Queen.