THE BRITISH THREAD II

Ah Spendy, a person as wise as you will know that the Scots were the people who built and who maintained the British Empire.
While the English were dreaming in their spires, the Scots got things done.
We even founded the Bank of England, to keep our bawbees.

And who controlled the engines of the USS Enterprise, without which no-one could boldly go anywhere? It was Scotty.

Great story Ionus ... a keeper ! (However, I think I'll create a new version with an Irisman in the lead.)

The Scots founded Coutts Bank too and that's "really posh", as Ms Lumley might say.

But I asked you whether your presence in our midst means that you agree with Dr. Johnson's remark.

I recommend Mr Boswell's writings to your attention. Any decent secondhand bookseller will have some at a cheap price and one most of them will reduce if mildly pressed.

Just wanted to pop in and say thanks!! Thank you very much!

http://www.accessatlanta.com/celebrities-tv/poll-world-s-best-309064.html

(Carry on)

Which is an excellent reason for people to take their holidays in the United States, Brazil, Spain, Australia, Italy and Sweden before considering coming here and bothering us with their idiotic ideas of their silly selves.

I'm confident you would be a major attraction spendi !

How are you, by the way. You can at times be a pain in the ass, but overall I like you and enjoy most of your posts. Not bad for a Brit !

If Northern Ireland leaves Britain, you will have to reorganise the flag..the Royal coat of arms...change the name ? Brit Ain is Hebrew for Land of the Covenant...it could do with a name change... How about Spiffy ? Or Lovely ? Those are pretty names. I know...Spendiain. Are we all agreed then ? Spendiain it is ?

England. (In gland--geddit?)

Of course I dont get it.

How come?

Well I must not do then. Not get it I mean. I wouldn't want to be seen getting a joke that Ionus didn't get. I would be mortified. So mortified I might say, you're honour, that I would seek a cubicle to be mortified in so I could be in private. Which word derives from the same root in some language or other as the word "privvy" does meaning bogs, shitthouse, and the various euphemisms one hears in genteel company for the office.

It would mean that I had been kidding myself that I had got the joke in order to appear smart and Ionus has exposed my weakness. That's pretty mortifying I should have said. I had laughed at the joke a good few times down the years, more smirking latterly, especially at the costume dramas, and here I am finding out it's not a joke and I had been laughing and smirking at something that wasn't funny.

The English Rose mate. What a race of human beings that conjures up. From Mrs Mops to mill girl to molls to madames of the mansions. I'd like to see Darwin pin that species of humanity to his exhibition board. I think it was the quality of the vapours off the hayfields and the number of hiding places there are associated with haytime. Which quality was mainlined on top of a haystack with the ladder pulled up and the church bells are ringing to call decent folks to their praying and singing.

It's a tentative theory. And the climate and the soil are not forgotten.

Obviously, with globalisation, She is becoming a distant dream. An anachronism some would say. Going to church on Easter Sunday in your new bonnet and flashing bashful, half downward glances at the squire's 4th-in-line who keeps catching your eye. It is a bit old fashioned I have to admit. And I don't forget that outside the church walls the infants were dying faster than they do now.

Although, having said that, your remark might be a sarcasm at my "geddit" thing as if I thought you needed any directions in order to get such a joke and that I was insulting your intelligence.

Not at all. It represents a nudge in the ribs. There's another level. There's a serious side to the flippancy. Ironic Zen maybe.

Welcome back Francois. What's going on in Greece? Are you one of the ones who goes around sorting out government finances in various countries in order to ensure that the European monetary mechanismsn functions smoothly and we can all sleep comfortably in our beds at night: and some of the day.

You were in Ireland recently you said. I don't believe anybody would go to Ireland without being paid. From Gay Paree!! Are you kidding?

Should we be worried about Greece. Wasn't Stendhal posted to where he was because France was worried about Italy? Our News suggests we should be worried about it but they are always suggesting things we should worry about. And politicians are being up-beat about the problem but they always are aren't they.

What's your take on Greece?

Oh--I nearly forgot--I hope you had a good trip and only returned with things you wanted to return with.

Weeeeaal it is the Brit thread.

Thank you for your welcome, Spendi.

What's going on in Greece is the result of loose governance, absence of political commitment and prevarication.

Spending more than you earn is a problem but not for those who deal with your money as a taxpayer.

Now, what's the better solution to correct this problem, no one really knows because of the too many variables involved.

Some guidelines are delivered by many experts and the result is a plan that is beginning to be implemented there.

Not many reactions from the main street, only sporadic demonstrations.

A general strike is planned to the next 24th, just when I'll be back there.

I'm not one of those who sort out the government finances, I'm sufficiently busy sorting out my own.

I don't travel for pleasure (only), I try to get a fair remuneration for my know-how.

That's what I did recently in Ireland, in Greece, in England.

As a matter of fact, I'll be again in England in about three weeks.

Most of the time, I have good trips and, being the spartan I am, I only take some dirty cloths home..

I almost feel the urge to offer myself as your chauffeur when you come to England providing the compensation is sufficient to entice me away from my daily routines which are very amenable.

Have you seen the Tiger Woods apology. And I I thought the death of Little Nell was gut wrenching.

Here is an apology to the self from James Boswell--



I know Boswell was unmarried but he was being unfaithful to that class of ladies from which he was expected to choose his wife from. And which he eventually did.

It can't be a coincidence that James Joyce made Molly Bloom an officer's daughter born in Gibraltar.

P.S. You know how much I admire your literary English considering it is not your native tongue so I'm confident you won't take it amiss if I suggest that your fourth sentence flows better without the second comma.

Spendi, I feel it would be ungentlemanly of me to bribe you as to remove you, even for a limited duration, from the amenability of your routines.

However, in the improbable happenstance we could be in the same region, it would be a pleasure to share a pint, of which obviously, I'd endorse the cost...


Ah! What couldn't I say about about officers' and diplomatic personnel daughters!

You know, Spendi, there's nothing to be taken amiss, on the contrary.

I don't pretend to be exempt of errors, there are inherent to my human nature.

Spendy, your recent essays lead one to suspect your current reading is more likely to have been The Ginger Man (Donleavy) than Boswell/Johnson.

Well done, very good.

I'm afraid you are wrong there Mac. I read The Ginger Man a long while ago. It was "alright". Quite amusing in parts. I even remember a sentence from it. From the coal-hole scene. I'll not quote it to save the blushes of the ladies. I didn't like Beastly Beatitudes much.

I have just finished In Search of a Wife and the London Journal. And I read a page or two of Tristram Shandy nearly everyday. More than that and I can start hallucinating.

I have the Hebrides Journey somewhere so I'm searching for that.

Because here a "gentleman's gland" is a euphemism for a penis. If I were to "get it " I would consider myself more French than English.

Obviously, we are cracking jokes that neither wants to understand..