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THE BRITISH THREAD II

Forums: Europe, British, Britain, Brits, able2know
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Sat 12 Jul, 2008 03:40 pm
Or as we say here

"If Spendy is cynical and sarky, it's going to rain. If Spendy is going to be sarky and cynical, then it's already raining."
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Sat 12 Jul, 2008 03:46 pm
Hey Steve, what is your theory about Lord Lucan? I'll buy.
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Sat 12 Jul, 2008 04:09 pm
SATIRE IS DEAD: OFFICIAL

I see that in Norn Iron they have re-christened the Orange Order parades as the "Orangefest" and invited the whole community to join in as for a day of family fun.

Rolling Eyes

Only twelve policemen injured so far.
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Sat 12 Jul, 2008 05:20 pm
You do know that a policeman being injured is now defined as having your helmet knocked askew and it cricking you neck and causing a bad back and six months sick leave on full pay.
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Sat 12 Jul, 2008 05:25 pm
Mac wrote-

Quote:
On the other hand, I know a man who worked on a contract in Fort William and it didn't stop raining for six weeks.


Anybody who goes to work in Fort William deserves all he gets. I'm surprised the locals didn't tar and feather him for bringing such a deluge down upon them with his presence.
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Jul, 2008 01:14 am
Can anyone be more helpful here?

http://www.able2know.org/forums/viewtopic.php?t=119348
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Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Jul, 2008 11:22 am
McTag wrote:
Hey Steve, what is your theory about Lord Lucan? I'll buy.
It'll cost. Actually I have no theory about Lord Lucan, other than he murdered the nanny and ran away.

Fort William. There is an aluminium smelter there, using hydroelectric power. When I visited as a student I remember a) a six inch nail resting at a 45 degree angle to the floor because of the electric/magnetic flux. b) when we escaped to a bar, they wouldnt serve us because one of us aspirant metallurgists was a woman. And we showing solidarity with the weaker sex, although she could eat irn grdrs, wouldnt shift to the "lounge". That is a fair summary of my knowledge about aluminium...
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Jul, 2008 05:05 pm
You have it all ass-backwards Steve.

The lady wasn't banned because she was a member of the "weaker sex". That's just a literary conceit of your's.

She was banned for evolutionary reasons on account of the trouble her sisters had caused in the past.
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2008 02:14 am
In the 1960s in Scotland, quaintly, women were not allowed to drink in public bars.

I know a woman who was an airhostess at the time, she told me she and her smartly-dressed pal walked into a pub in Sauchiehall Street (Glasgow city centre, and therefore as civilized as you're liable to get) and the barman said one word to them: "Oot".

Charming. If the premises had a lounge bar, that's where the ladies were supposed to go. If not, not.
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Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2008 03:24 am
spendius wrote:
You have it all ass-backwards Steve.
Quite possibly. But then I am a mere male. Actually its a bit of a shock to the male psyche to realise that on just about every measure, women are the stronger sex.

And before someone says men are "stronger" thats only because women got us running after wild animals to provide food.

Men and women are equal in law but not in biology. immo.
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2008 11:46 am
I agree Steve- I am so much in awe of women that I steer clear of them as much as I can manage.

What a fantastic Test Match that one was. I saw every ball. most of them more than once.

They even managed to have a farcical denoument. It only lacked a lady streaker with big tits, to remind us men of our proper position in the order of things, for it to have been perfection.

There is no other game which has commentaries of the class cricket has. Nothing else comes close. It's a learning experience which beats 5 days in a bloody school into a cocked hat for usefulness.
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Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2008 01:32 pm
spendius wrote:
I agree Steve- I am so much in awe of women that I steer clear of them as much as I can manage.

What a fantastic Test Match that one was. I saw every ball. most of them more than once.

They even managed to have a farcical denoument. It only lacked a lady streaker with big tits, to remind us men of our proper position in the order of things, for it to have been perfection.

There is no other game which has commentaries of the class cricket has. Nothing else comes close. It's a learning experience which beats 5 days in a bloody school into a cocked hat for usefulness.
Gosh! What happened? I was watching Le Tour de France. Dont tell me England won?
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Jul, 2008 05:09 pm
Cricket won Steve.

Now on to Headingly for more days of idle bliss.
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2008 01:04 am
I don't like cricket.

In fact, I'm going off most sports.
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Steve 41oo
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2008 02:32 pm
you're just missing footie mct

wait until city play an exciting nil nil draw at home to aston villa.

that'll get the old juices flowing
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2008 03:22 pm
It will if he has a £50 a goal up bet on City.
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Jul, 2008 11:33 pm
That history book on the shelf
Is always repeating itself
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Wed 16 Jul, 2008 01:41 am
It was shining there for you and me
For liberty, Fernando
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Wed 16 Jul, 2008 01:44 am
Vodaloo
How does it feel to have vundavoh?
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McTag
 
  1  
Reply Thu 17 Jul, 2008 06:07 am
Seemingly my quotations from the classics have chased everyone away.
If Smorgs was here, she would gleefully pitch in, I'm sure.

Okay I'm off out for some pub grub in The Nursery.
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