Linda gives her best friend Rose the "evil eye" as they walk toward the bus. Because her eye was black, the look had a special air of evil-ness it didn't normally have. Rose snickers and says, "Just think about all the wonderful scenery you'll see on the way! Too bad I can't go with you, but if I miss that appointment tomorrow I'll never hear the end of it." She shrugs. "Gotta get to the airport so I'll be there in time for dinner!" Rose reaches to hug Linda goodbye.
"Bitch." Linda mutters as she returns the hug. They both laugh (Rose laughs hardest) and Linda reaches up and climbs on the bus.
"I can't believe I'm doing this." she thinks to herself as she stands at the front of the aisle deciding where to sit. Last night she and Rose, over several Scotch and waters, were trying to one-up each other in the tough times department.
Both were very wealthy, but hadn't always been. Neither of them had a terrible past -- both came from middle to upper-middle class families, hadn't been abused, had a date to the prom. They both went to college, where they met, and graduated to become successful business women. Both were also single moms and really did have a tough time making ends meet for a while, but for the past 25 years they've lived anything but the tough life.
One of Linda's sob stories was that she had to ride the bus to work for a while when she didn't have a car. "You gotta do what you gotta do." she heroically stated as Rose laughed histerically.
"I'd love to see you on a bus!" Rose teased, "That's the funniest thing I've thought of in a long time -- you on a bus!"
And that's where the bet came in. If Linda took the bus from Albuquerque to Oklahoma City, Rose would fly her first-class back to Houston, where they live. Linda couldn't resist, just to show how she can still live like "everyone else."
She scans the bus and decides to sit in the second row behind a couple of older men. She thinks they look interesting and tries to think of a story to tell them to break the ice and make friends. She was great at telling stories, and they were mostly true. She found that light-hearted self-deprecation was the best approach, and that would be easy with her black-eye.
She sits in the aisle seat and opens her Coach backpack. She retrieves an insulated water bottle and puts the backpack under her seat. "I'm glad I bought that bottle of J&B last night." she thinks as she takes a swig.
"Hi, I'm Linda." she introduces herself to the two men in front of her. She asks where they're going, thinks it's cool that they're musicians and they're friendly, and takes a sigh of relief.
"I've just been on a vacation with my girlfriend, we do this every year. We stayed at a wonderful farm -- Oh! It was so beautiful -- they had peacocks and big white geese and chickens -- the omlettes were made with fresh eggs! It was absolutely wonderful!" she told them. They looked unimpressed.
"And then, a couple of days ago, we walked down to the little area where they keep the sheep and the caretaker let us hold a little baby lamb. Oh! It was so precious!" She laughs and takes a drink from her water bottle.
"Well the caretaker had to run inside his little house to take a phone call, so he left us alone with the baby lamb, and the little lamb jumps out of my arms and starts running toward the pond! Rose and I ran after it and couldn't catch it, and then I tripped and fell right down and hit my eye -- so now I've got a black eye."
The men laughed at the thought -- Linda wasn't exactly the quick and agile type.
"My husband is going to kill me," she laughed, "he keeps telling me he's going to forbid Rose from calling because we always seem to get into trouble on our little trips!"
She took another sigh of relief. They seem to like her. She has friends on the bus. She wasn't alone and bored. Maybe this won't be so bad after all -- and it can't take that much longer than going through an airport, these days. She took another swig of "water" and asked the men for one of their stories.
LibertyD: that was great! I reckon the problem with this site is that I asked players to flesh out their characters in much more depth than is/was typical. That can require a couple of hundred well-chosen words instead of a quick, witty, response.
Thanks for coming back. -rjb-
Well I think this is fun -- thanks for posting it! Everyone else just doesn't know what they're missing out on.
Loved your entry, LibertyD! Have been down with back pain the last couple of days, only up for about 30 min. at a time. Seeing the doctor tomorrow, so will try to add more as soon as I'm able.
Eva, I'm sorry to hear that you're in pain. I hope that the doc can help you out. Take it easy, and we'll look forward to hearing from you when you're able. Let me know if I can do anything for you!
Just a back strain, nothing to worry about. Take my pills and don't lift anything for a couple of weeks. Will take awhile, that's all. Thanks for thinking of me!
Hi...I'm sad that that this little story didn't get along very far. Several people took the time to invent some characters. More than likely those characters will live on in other stories.
I love the concept of "communal" writing and I will stick with it. I hope there are other kindred spirits.
If you don't like the idea of the bus, please feel free to start a new story. I admit that I am a rural redneck; so an urban story could be more appropiate.
If nobody responds, watch out. Gothboy called with this: Swatting flies-$1.00 each.
I think he is in Oklahoma.
---realjohnboy---
Well, realjohn. I tried.
Bet you can drive a John Deere tractor...bet you can lift heavy stuff.
and to tell you the truth, that is the stuff that stories are made of.
Letty...yes...and no, not too much anymore.
I do believe it is your turn to craft a story that we can play with. Otherwise we're going with the gothkid and his $1 flies. -realjohnboy-
rjb -- I think it's time to start a new idea. How about one with some built-in humor and/or frivolity? This one was entirely too serious, IMHO.
eva--time to start a new idea, indeed. I'm not sure I agree that the bus story was too serious. Griffin, in the back, was looking forward to some heavy partying and Curtis was a pretty laid-back dude.
But so be it. Can you launch a new story for us?
I promise that I won't kill off any of your characters
for at least a day or two. -rjb-
Oh, I didn't mean any criticism, rjb. Several of the characters could have added some levity. It just didn't happen fast enough. It was a fine idea...too bad it didn't attract the usual fun-loving bunch of writers around here. I will try to think of a set-up.
Before I delete this thread, I invite the newer posters to the "Creative Writing" category to add on to this story or start a new one.
You will find out very quickly whether the characters you add resonate with the readers (I thought Griffin and Curtis would be great; but they bombed.)
Another character, in another story, not only lasted for a long time but also got fleshed out by other writers and became the hero. Please read back a couple pages and think about the concept of "communal writing." Thank you. -rjb--
Resuscitation attempt in the Original Writing category. More later.. Please stay tuned.
<adjusting the setting on the dial>
ehBeth wrote:<adjusting the setting on the dial>
Adjusting the setting on the dial still didn't quite bring the station into focus. The constant figgling wasted precious time. Julia was not in the mood to fight the boob tube tonight. She was ready to sit down to watch her favorite actor, Cary Grant, on BRAVO. They were running a Cary Grant festival and she was determined not to miss it.
All her desires revolved around Cary Grant. The perfect man for her. Suave, debonaire and the most handsome man that she had ever seen.
Ever since leaving the asylum her only thoughts were watching Cary Grant movies and revenge of course!
Griffin & Curtis were two of a number of characters I created on this thread and on another called "a continuing story" way back in 2003. It was fun.
I will make a contribution to Julia's story in due course. Thanks. -rjb-
My word. I killed off the woman on the bus because I thought there were no rules. Now we see the willow tree with the mad Julia stalking Cary.
I'm confused.
A Pompous Bunch of Asses
Snuggle in, folks, and let me tell you about Gloria.
A Ppompous Bunch of Asses
It is not called an insane asylum anymore, of course. When Gloria started working there back in 1965 it was called that, but then it was just the asylum and later the institution and now totally sanitized into Western State Hospital.
Gloria has worked there almost from the beginning. Her mother worked there when it first opened. The state needed a place like this and the legislators knew that but they didn't want it in Richmond or in Northern Virginia or in Charlottesville so they tucked it way far away where the states of Virginia, Tennessee and West Virginia meet. And they called it "regional job creation."
And Gloria has worked there for forty years.
(Catch the drift, folks? Nothing has to happen right away. Julia, Gloria...add more or expand) -rjb
