Shiva Facilitator?

I've never heard of a shiva facilitator.

Neither did I, till I saw an advertisment in The Forward for one.
The ad read, bonded and insured, which surpirsed me.

What does a shiva facilitator actually do? Set up a house for shiva? Anyone can do that - you just cover the mirrors and set up boxes for the family to sit on, and give a torn black ribbon to the closest family members to wear (actually, the rabbi at the funeral is nearly always the one to supply the ribbons, and the funeral home provides the boxes - and anyone can grab a sheet or pillowcase and cover a mirror).

So, I repeat, what does this person do?

I have no idea, what they do. I never even had heard of them prior to the ad I saw in the newspaper. Maybe, the next time I see the ad, I'll contact them and find out what they do.

I'm not Jewish, but I'm guessing a Shiva Facilitater would be insured and bonded just the way employees of cleaning firms and interior decoration companies and other people who go into the homes of strangers to perform fairly intimate services.

I am Jewish, but when I read the topic, I thought of the Hindu god. No lie. I must be REALLY out of touch with my heritage. Then again, I did go to a show at the art museum yesterday all about Hindu mythology...

I don't know what it's like where you are, but shiva here can often mean some fairly serious catering. Bonding would be required for the service staff that comes into the home. I've been to a couple of reform and conservative homes where the food for the shiva rivalled anything i've seen at an Italian wedding. It was a bit startling the first time.

D'Artagnan

Without the word "sitting" in front of it, Shiva does tend to get interpreted as the Indian God.

Glad I stopped by.

Interesting info for non-Jews here.

I've never been to a catered shiva. Here (at least at the ones I've attended in NY, NJ, PA and FL), it's more of a potluck thing. You bring a covered dish; it's a part of showing that you care.

I can see what you mean if it does involve catering - I imagine the facilitator would be somewhat like a party planner in that instance. Interesting.

http://www.columbiajewish.org/chevrabklt.PDF

Good link for information.

Well, I suppose if bar mitzvahs can be overdone, why not shivas? Nothing would suprise me in this regard anymore...

True!

I guess I also gotta fess up on this.

One of the most wonderous taste sensations in all the world -- is the taste of a bit of lox on a bagel spread with a liberal dose of cream cheese.

The only time I have ever had that delight was at various shivas which I attended.

Don't get me wrong, I am not hoping for deaths among my Jewish friends just so I can get my lox and cream cheese (which I probably could buy and put together without a shiva) -- but it was just an observation I wanted to share.

Food is supposed to soothe the soul.

Should add:

I for one, could never sit down and eat after a funeral. I just want to be alone with my sorrow and memories.

Frank, as you point out, the bagel and cream cheese combo is a winner. I'm sure you can score some in New Jersey! Add some lox for a real treat. It's "to die for", if you'll pardon the expression...

It's later than you think. Go eat that lox right now!

I will add one more voice to the thread. I am Jewish and have both sat shiva and visited many people who were sitting. And never have I heard of a shiva facilitator. However,in today's world if there is a buyer there will be a seller. .

Anyone ever received an invite to a Bar Mitzvah weekend? I have. I just did the actual in-temple part and the next two hours. The invitation to the most recent one started with a dinner-dance on Friday night - then Saturday brunch for family and the closest 50 or so friends -then the Bar Mitzvah itself - then off to a room in the synagogue for a few speeches, wine, fruit, sandwiches and cake. The rest of the party then headed off to be 'done up' for the Saturday night dance. And then, on Sunday morning, another restaurant get-together! I don't know if I ever had the stamina for something like that.

And if you miss most of it (like I did, because I had a horrible cold), they'll bring the albums and video over for you to watch.